Pretense of Living
by Rachelle Ryan
Summary: Sequel to Bloody Hell. We all know there's more to Xander than meets the eye… but his friends don't. He intends to keep it that way only life gets in the way, as usual. Abandoned Sorry.
1. Return of the Zeppo

Disclaimer: I don't own anything that belongs to Joss; I don't have enough energy to list it all. I'm making no money off this so if he tries to sue.all the power to him. His lawyers are about the only ones who'd profit.  
  
Summary: Sequel to Bloody Hell. We all know there's more to Xander than meets the eye. but his friends don't. He intends to keep it that way only life gets in the way, as usual.  
  
A/N: You might want to be slightly familiar with season four because that's when this story is based and some facts come directly from the show. I got all my information from BuffyWorld- a complete guide to all Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel episodes. So I'd like to thank them along with my beta Tray. ***  
  
Pretense of Living  
  
Chapter 1: Return of the Zeppo (Never Underestimate the Power of the Twinkie)  
  
Xander  
  
It's strange. After all the shit that went down this summer I came home and finally grasped the fact that everything was going to be the same as I had left it. My father is still an abusive drunken bastard, my friends still white hats fighting the good fight trying to push me out for my own good. And me? I am still going to be playing the part of the Zeppo. I'm stuck playing something I no longer am. By my own hand. With no way out. I can't exactly jump up and say, "Hey guys you don't have to treat me with kid gloves anymore. I can pull my own weight. Hell, I can pull your weight too. Want to see?" As much as I yearn for them to treat me like an equal, and to see the looks on their faces, I just can't bring myself to dump my problems on them. I have years of experience when it comes to keeping the painful truth secret. I figured that one more undisclosed part of my life wouldn't be that much harder to handle when I told Methos and Richie that I was going back. I didn't want them to be burdened with my troubles before and I still don't. I'll admit I'm not just doing it solely out of the kindness of my heart. There's a good dose of selfishness mixed in. Knowledge of my abilities would give us a major edge in the slayage of bad guys. But Willow would never be able to look at me the same way if she found out just how many people I've had to kill to keep my head where it belongs and Buffy would never see me as a non-threat again. She'd always look at me and see someone who could easily hurt those she was destined to protect. I've been putting off a confrontation, out of guilt maybe, because I know that I'll be spending a great deal of my time lying to them about this summer.  
  
'God help me, but I am glad to be home.'  
  
The familiar pulse and beat of music thundered through the Bronze. While it wasn't my first stop tonight it was about the 14th. Cemeteries first, habits die hard, but they were dead as far as vamps were concerned. 'I guess the summer lull is still in effect.' I took another sip of my Coke and swept the shifting figures on the dance floor. While I didn't have Buffy's good eye for fashion faux pas I had my own way of detecting the undead. I took another swig to wash the bitter taste from my mouth. 'Oh yeah. My own handy dandy id service. One vamp to another and all that.'  
  
The band on stage switched to a slow mournful tune and couples took the excuse to snuggle closer. At that moment Buffy entered looking as if the music perfectly suited her mood. 'Down is not the right word.' She repeated my earlier gesture, sweeping the crowd, and impossibly looked more dejected afterward. Shoulders slumped as she drug her feet to the couch. Buffy didn't quite flop down, but it was close. 'Better go see what's got the Buffster in the dumpster.' Leaving my drink, I made my way to my long time no-see friend.  
  
"The whole world in front of her, and she comes back to this dive." I quipped in Buffy's ear after coming up behind her and simultaneously crouching to wrap my arms around her shoulders. She gave a start and I got a little satisfaction in knowing that I'd caught her unaware.  
  
"Xander!" She twisted in my arms to look up at me. I felt a twinge of guilt at the obvious eagerness on her face at seeing me.  
  
"Hey, Buff." I came around the couch and sat next to her.  
  
"Oh, when did you get back?" She looked like she wanted to cling to me.  
  
I hesitated for a few seconds. "Couple days ago." The best lies are mostly truth. Shock colored her face and she punched my arm, on the side of hard. If not for my interesting summer I had a feeling a bruise would have been forming.  
  
"You freak of nature. Why didn't you call me?" Thunderclouds began roaring on the horizon.  
  
"Well, I knew you guys were starting the whole college adventure and I didn't want to," 'Shit think fast Harris.' "um, you know... help you move." I finished lamely. I wanted to hit my head on the couch arm. However, Buffy seemed to buy it.  
  
"I missed you. How was your trip? Is America nice? I hear it's nice." 'Always with the hard ones Buff. Oh well, time for the joking. '  
  
"There's some purple mountains majesty, I'm gonna have to say." I slipped into character easily.  
  
Buffy plowed on despite that rather absurd answer. "What'd you do? What'd you see?"  
  
"Well... " 'I died, slayed, killed, and got staked. I saw vampires, immortals, Angel, oh and lets not forget Drusilla.'  
  
"Tell me!"  
  
'Sorry Buff.'  
  
"'Grand Canyon!'" I blurted. It was the first thing non-weirdo related that popped into my mind.  
  
Buffy seemed impressed. "You saw the Grand Canyon!"  
  
Inwardly, I smiled. "Well, I saw the movie 'Grand Canyon,' on cable." 'I enjoyed that cable at Chez Adam.' " Really lame."  
  
"Hunh?" She looked utterly lost there.  
  
'Ah time for the cover story.'  
  
I'd had fun thinking this one up. "Basically, I got as far as Oxnard and the engine fell out of my car, and that was literally." Yep. " So, I ended up washing dishes at 'The Fabulous Ladies Night Club'," 'Kitty's Men, not so fabulous or so clubish.' "for about a month and a half while I tried to pay for the repairs. No one really bothered me or even spoke to me until one night when one of the male strippers called in sick and no power on this earth will make me tell you the rest of that story. Suffice to say I managed to trade it for something not entirely made of rust and made it back to this fair burg. How's college?"  
  
Buffy face was a cross between disbelief and disbelief. "Male strippers?"  
  
"No power on this earth!" I answered forcefully, inwardly laughing.  
  
"Ok." She visibly tore her mind away from what was probably a very funny mental image. "College is good."  
  
I quirked an eyebrow at her. 'My Aunt Betsy's a better liar when she's three sheets to the wind.'  
  
"Ok, uh, once more with even less feeling." I punched the air.  
  
"No, really! I-I mean, Willow's in heaven and Oz has this really cool house off campus with the band." She didn't look at me as she spoke. 'That's them.' I silently mused.  
  
"And you're sitting here alone at the Bronze looking like you just got diagnosed with cancer of the puppy. " Buffy looked away.  
  
"It's just... there was this vampire, and she took me down, and I just... I don't know how to stop her. She turned this guy I sort of liked stole his stuff then she beat on me and stole my stuff. All I've got is a bare mattress and a note saying I couldn't take it and took off." Her thumb rubbed anxiously against her knuckles as she told me about it.  
  
I smiled. Gung-ho Xander reporting for duty. "Then where's the gang? Avengers assemble! Let's get it going!"  
  
"No, I don't want to bug them. I mean they're just starting school, and they don't need this." She looked really crestfallen.  
  
'This isn't like her.' " Ok Buff, what's the 'what' here?"  
  
She took a deep breath and let it out. Then waved her hands around mournfully. "It's just, what if I can't cut it?" I could hear the self- doubt in her voice. Something I am not unaccustomed to.  
  
"Can't cut what? Slaying?" I gently probed.  
  
She sighed. "Slaying, everything."  
  
The only cure I know of for self-doubt is laughter. Laughing at myself usually but maybe for her laughing at me will be enough. "Buffy, this is all about fear. It's understandable, but you can't let it control you. 'Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to anger.' No wait, hold on. 'Fear leads to hate. Hate leads to the dark side.' Hold on, no, umm, 'First you get the women, then you get the money, then you...' okay, can we forget that?" 'Ha all those years with Willow made me an expert at babble speak.'  
  
The smile that graced Buffy's face was worth my self-deprecation half- hearted though it was. "Thanks for the Dadaist pep talk, I feel much more abstract now."  
  
She's still fighting it. Okay to the root of the matter then. "The point is, you're Buffy. "  
  
"Yeah, maybe in high school I was Buffy. " She looked away, face drawn.  
  
"And now in college you're Betty Louise? " I guess I'm not the only one with an identity disorder.  
  
Falsely cheerful, she straightened and did her best hick impression. "Yeah, I'm Betty Louise Plotnick of East Cupcake, Illinois." She slumped down again and whispered, "Or I might as well be." I got off the couch and crouched before her feeling slightly silly. Pushing that feeling aside I focused on Buffy, my hurting friend.  
  
Gathering my thoughts I said, "Buffy, I've gone through some fairly dark times in my life, faced some scary things, among them the kitchen at 'The Fabulous Ladies Night Club.' Let me tell you something, when it's dark and I'm all alone and I'm scared or freaked out or whatever, I always think, 'What would Buffy do?' You're my hero." I spoke more truth than I had in a while. I continued with a diversion. "Ok, sometimes when it was dark and I was all alone I'd think, 'What is Buffy wearing?'"  
  
Buffy's face screwed up at that last detail. "Can that be one of those things you never, ever, tell me about?"  
  
I smiled. "It's a deal." I stood up. "Let's put this bitch in the ground! What do you say?" She held out her right hand and I helped her up.  
  
"I think I say thank you." I saw some of the fire returning to her eyes.  
  
Time to bring up the cover story again. "And nothing says thank you like dollars in the waistband. Ok, what do we do first?" Buffy looked slightly distressed at that. She'd been raring to go and now she was stuck at where to go. Turning my mind to the problem, I started talking. "Alright so she tried to set it up so it looked like you just took off? And it's safe to assume they've done this more than twice because you know vamps, no originality. There should be records of all the kids who've 'taken off' in the administration building right?"  
  
The uncertainty disappeared and her face lit up. "Right!"  
  
Now to reassert my stupidity. "Uh, exactly where is that?" Buffy rolled her eyes.  
  
Buffy  
  
The glass window made a satisfying crunch as I put my elbow through it. This wasn't the first time I'd done something on the shady side of morality. Breaking an entering isn't anything major compared to blowing up a school or burning one down though. I stepped inside wincing as I heard the glass crunch with every step. 'Good thing the guards here are as fond of their sleep as those all over Sunnydale.' The inside of the office looked like every other one I'd ever been in, those mostly being principal's. Eyes lighting on the computer I made a beeline for it. While I might not be a wizard at computer manipulation, Willow has taught me well. I heard Xander enter as glass broke even more beneath his feet. Looking up I saw him going for the newspapers on the desk.  
  
Turning back to the screen I began punching the keys with my right hand and started my search. "Kids disappearing every year. Not too many, just enough so that everyone thinks they up and left." I muttered as I called up the info on students.  
  
I heard papers rustling. "I still can't believe the vampires took your stuff. Murder I expect, but petty larceny seems so... petty."  
  
I had to agree there. Stealing some college kid's stuff seems so.low on the terror scale. "They have to be keeping it somewhere, on campus or at least near by."  
  
"Hey, how far back do the disappearances go?" 'Valid question.'  
  
I looked at the frequency of leavers. "Uhh... they weren't too common before '82."  
  
The rustling stopped. "Match number! Check this out." I looked up as he carried two newspapers over to me.  
  
"'Psi Theta loses its charter. Building to be closed for renovation.'" I read out loud.  
  
Xander nodded so vigorously I thought his head might fall off. "1982. Look at this." He picked up the other paper and started reading from it. "'Former Psi Theta fraternity house lies dormant while zoning issues drag on before the city council.' We have a winner."  
  
"Looks pretty cherry." My fears came back and I started feeling uneasy again.  
  
"You up for a little reconnaissance?" Xander asked with a grin.  
  
I frowned. "You mean where we all sculpt and paint and stuff?" 'What does that have to do with anything?'  
  
"No, that was the renaissance." Xander corrected me.  
  
"Oh. I've had a really long week. Let's go look at the house. " I wondered briefly why he knew that, then dismissed it.  
  
Xander  
  
It made sense the being able to see in darkness ability that I'd inherited from the vamp demon, they wouldn't want to spend eternity bumping into things, but I doubted I'd ever get used to it. Reading the "This Property Closed to the Public" and "Keep Out" signs, I crept up to the building trailing behind Buffy and letting her take charge. I think her confidence still needed some boosting. She tilted her head to the roof and I nodded. I could see a skylight up there. It'd be easier to spy on them through it than any of the ground floor windows where they might see us. Up on the roof, Buffy cleared some debris from the skylight as she laid on it. Joining her, I could see the vamps below us going through Buffy's things.  
  
"Score!" There was triumph in her whisper. One of the vamps held a skirt up to herself and shook her hips.  
  
"Look how tough I am." She pantomimed Buffy's voice, making fun of her. I looked over at her to see how she'd take it.  
  
"Oh! That's my skirt! You're never going to fit in it with those hips! We have to kill them!" 'Angry's good. It's better than defeated.'  
  
"We need weapons." I pointed out. I had my guns and a few stakes but I couldn't use just those to handle a nest like this in front of Buffy. That just wouldn't fit with her version of me.  
  
She nodded and squinted down below. "I don't see my weapons trunk down there. It was right by my bed. Mr. Gordo?" Her voice became like frozen steel. Suddenly I pitied those poor vamps. "Go to my room." I almost grinned at her command. 'She's back' "If it's not there try Willow's. I'll keep an eye... my diary?!? " I winced at the high squeal in her voice. I'd had my hearing up on high in case some vamp had tried to sneak up on us. I rubbed my ear. 'That hurt.'  
  
"Uh-oh, score!" Another vampire crowed plucking up the diary.  
  
"I'll hurry!" I started shimmying back to solid ground. 'Great Harris, now what are you going to do? You can't just leave her here.'  
  
I deliberately dawdled, but Buffy was no longer paying any attention to me. She was focusing on the vampires vandalizing her stuff. I heard Buffy growl. "Laugh all you want, this time we play it my way. And the rules are just going to be a little bit..."  
  
I was halfway to the edge of the roof when I heard cracking. I turned back, a warning on my lips, only to see her fall through the skylight. 'Shiiiit.' I ran back and looked down. Buffy had hit the floor right smack dab in the middle of the vamps.  
  
Sunday  
  
It's not everyday a mortal wanders into our lair. Falling into it happens even less often. I looked at the pathetic thing that had fallen through our roof and wondered what frat had dared her to make this suicidal pledge. The fact that this building is haunted is well known along with the one that anyone that comes here never returns. As she got up I realized that I recognized this particular meat. The Slayer. Back for more. I can't believe I was even slightly scared of her. "Say, don't I know you from... beating the crap out of you?"  
  
She got up and tried to look tough. "I just thought I'd drop in. Get it? Drop in? Boy, tough room." I rolled my eyes at her stupid quip. 'Any lamer and she'd be Seinfield.' I took her in. No weapons and the way she was holding her arm made it positively look broken. Easy kill. However my mother always said I liked to play with my food too much, and she should know.  
  
I raised my hands up in mock submission. "I must say, you've really got me now. I mean, it's a diabolical plan, throw yourself at my feet with a broken arm and no weapons of any kind. How'm I going to get out of this one?"  
  
"You got a nice set-up here, but you made one mistake." She threatened.  
  
Hmm, might as well ask. It's expected. "Yeah? What was that?"  
  
The little miss seemed to lose her bravado. "Well, I'm not actually positive, but statistically speaking people usually make at least..." 'Well enough is enough.' I smiled as my punch took her breath away.  
  
Willow  
  
Oz and I'd stopped by to see Buffy only to find Kathy, Buffy's roommate, looking at a bare mattress with a note in her hand. "Uh, where's Buffy's stuff?" I was pretty sure I remembered her having stuff in her room. I did.  
  
Kathy turned to us. "It's gone. So is she." She gave us the note. After reading it my heart sank.  
  
'This is all just too much for me. I have decided to take off. Sorry I didn't have time to say goodbye but I need to be by myself. Good luck this year. Buffy'  
  
She was gone? When? Numbly, I gave the note back to Kathy who read it again as if it would change.  
  
"It seems kind of weird." She handed the note to Oz again.  
  
He read it for a second time and nodded. "Yeah, weird's a pretty good word for it."  
  
"Buffy wouldn't just take off, th-that's just not in her nature." Last summer popped into my mind. "Except for that one time she disappeared for several months and changed her name, but there were circumstances then. There's no circumstances." I babbled. She'd done it once. What would stop her from doing it again? I was a bad friend. Something had happened and I wasn't there for her so she left. Oh, bad me, bad me.  
  
"Does Buffy have a history of emotional problems? 'Cause on my request form I was pretty specific about a stable non-smoker." Kathy put in annoyingly. Buffy's gone! No time for you to think about your request form!  
  
"I don't think this is her handwriting." Oz sounded slightly perplexed. I wasn't listening anymore.  
  
"I bet there were circumstances! We've probably been so wrapped up in our own petty lives that... that we totally missed the circumstances. We're bad friends!" I told Oz everything that had been running through my mind.  
  
"Let's think this through." He answered.  
  
Amazed, I stared at him. We'd been bad friends. "How can you be so calm?"  
  
"Long, arduous hours of practice." He didn't blink at my newest accusation. Sometimes it is down right annoying to have a boyfriend that takes everything in stride. "Now either Buffy took off, or she was robbed, or..." The phone rang. Oz looked at me and at Kathy, then picked up the phone. "Hello?" Oz turned his head to stare directly into my eyes. He said, "A prank? Oh, that makes sense. Xander says that some 'old' friends took Buffy's stuff as a prank. They went to get it back."  
  
'Xander?' I asked silently with my eyes.  
  
Oz nodded slightly.  
  
I was happy Xander was back but why would he be calling about a prank.oh, of course, vampires. I maybe slow to the up take but I'm not stupid. Old equals vampires. I nodded back as Oz listened to Xander.  
  
"They're throwing a party and they can't find Buffy's party chest?" Oz continued. This time I got it right away. He meant Buffy's weapon chest. I checked the ended of the bed. Not there. I shook my head at Oz. "Oh you've got it there. At the old Psi Theata frat house? Thanks we'll be right over." I looked over at Kathy who was looking really confused.  
  
"It was all a prank?" Her forehead was all scrunched up.  
  
"Yep. Well we've got to be getting to that party." Oz answered saving me from having to come up with something to say myself then grabbed my arm and started pulling me out the door.  
  
"Uh, nice meeting you." I called over my shoulder.  
  
Just to be sure I knew what we were rushing head long into, I whispered to Oz, "Vampires?"  
  
He nodded.  
  
I groaned. "Oh joy. What else did Xander say?"  
  
"We have to get to your place to get supplies. Buffy's holding them off but we need to get over there."  
  
Buffy  
  
Once more the air got knocked out of me as I fell after taking a hit. 'I'm going to suffocate at this rate.' Gasping, I looked up to see my trunk not ten feet away. 'Damn I sent Xander away for nothing.' I started pulling myself towards it only to be blocked by Sunday's feet. Not sure why I even bothered I looked up. I saw red when I made out my Class Protector award in her hands.  
  
"Oh, and this. This is my favorite item." The same sadistic grin that had been on her face all night grew bigger as she taunted me.  
  
"You don't want to touch that. " Anger filled me as she twirled the award in her hands.  
  
My heart stopped when she dropped it on the floor and stomped on it. I looked at the broken handle then turned my gaze to that laughing face. I've never hated anyone more than in that moment. The one sign of recognition I'd ever gotten and she destroyed it! Sunday moved quickly, but not that quickly. I let her grab my arm. I winced in pain but let her think she had me. "You know this arm's not looking so good. It might have to come off." She purred into my ear.  
  
"You want to know the truth? I only need one." I whispered letting my grim hate pour into my voice. I hit her. Hard. My roundhouse punch sent her spinning away from me. Rolling to my feet I kicked Sunday in the face and flipped her over the couch onto the coffee table. Catching some broken wood from the coffee table with my foot I kicked it into her face. Sunday fell into a pile of clutter.  
  
"This is startin' to suck." I heard one of the other vamps remark behind me. I kept my attention on Sunday. She was the most dangerous, proving it she got up all vamped out. I saw the fat vamp rushing me from the corner of my eye; he was kind of hard to miss. Grabbing a tennis racket and stepping onto the arm of a chair I delivered a roundhouse kick to Sunday following, through with a backhand swing with the racket into FatVamp's face to complete the motion. Sunday did a neat fly over of the couch and Fatso broke my racket making it a perfect stake. I flipped it to hold in the correct way for it's new job. Sunday decided to get up close and personal and rushed me. Another vamp decided that the sight of me holding a stake was too much and headed to the door. I smiled. 'Once more striking fear into unbeating hearts. Yeah!'  
  
I heard the door opening and spared a quick glance in time to see the fleeing vampire become dust as Xander stepped through the door and jammed his stake into his heart. Oz came in behind him brandishing a cross with Willow in the rear carrying a crossbow. I turned back to Sunday who'd taken advantage of my distraction to take a swing at my left side. Trying I to hurt me where I'd already been wounded. Cheap trick. I grabbed her wrist as she swung taking her by surprise with my alertness and twisted it flipping her to the floor.  
  
I heard a, "Woah!" and took the chance to look. One of the vampires crumbled to reveal Willow's crossbow raised. I gazed down at the fallen vamp. "When you look back at this, in the three seconds it'll take you to turn to dust," I saw FatVamp decide it was a good time to leave and make a break for it but I couldn't turn from what I was doing to deal with the lackey. I didn't have to worry though, because Xander staked him from behind. I silently congratulated him on his stealthy approach, which even I hadn't seen. "I think you'll find the mistake was touching my stuff."  
  
Sunday got to her feet and I backpedaled, not wanting her to catch me in a lucky blow. She rushed and I swung at her with my good arm. Sunday blocked catching it in a hold.  
  
"What about breaking your arm?" She grabbed my right arm and I almost cried out, "How'd that feel?"  
  
"Let me answer that with a head butt." I gritted my teeth and threw my head back. I heard a crunch and she let go of me, staggering back. "And for the record," I made a fist with my left hand, "the arm is hurt." I uppercut Sunday sending her flying. "Not broken."  
  
Xander  
  
Once Buffy had fallen into the nest of vampires I had no choice but to stay and make sure Buffy didn't end up dead. I'd pulled out my cell and called back up, thanking my lucky stars that I'd asked Joyce for Buffy's number the other day. Watching Buffy get beat may not have been the hardest thing I'd had to do in my life, but it was one of the harder ones. I wanted to rush to her rescue but I couldn't. First of all she needed this fight, needed to know she could beat Sunday. Or else she'd forever haunt Buffy. I knew Buffy could win a few seconds into the fight. The vampire had power but no control or real skill. If Buffy hadn't been so down about college I imagine their first fight would have ended with Sunday needing a dust buster to collect herself. Secondly, I didn't want to give up my image as normal that easily. Not for that shoddy excuse for a vamp. I waited near the bushes for back up to arrive, staking a vamp that happened to be unlucky enough to discover me.  
  
Fighting as a normal human is harder than I expected. I have to keep fighting my instincts to shift into vamp mode. Dodging another sloppy swing I tried to make it look harder than it was. Oz got behind him and beaned him over the head with a cross.  
  
"That's going to make for an interesting bald spot." I quipped.  
  
When the enraged vamp turned to lunge at me Oz crouched down behind him. Then I pushed the vamp over the kneeling Oz. Oz stood and the vamp ended up on its back. Quickly I moved in for the kill. The stake slid in easily as I used a little of my real strength.  
  
Another vamp, wearing a black tee shirt with a skull on it, took off by crashing through a window on the other side of the room. He was too far off for me to get to, like I had with the fat vampire by using a burst of speed, without someone seeing. Besides the vamp Buffy was fighting, all the rest were beneath us or gone. We surrounded Buffy, backing her up.  
  
"Hey, Buff. Need a hand?" Oz asked.  
  
Buffy twirled her stake around showing off. "No thanks." She twisted around and threw the stake into Sunday's heart. "I'm good." Sunday shook her head and put her hands on her hips as she turned to dust. Buffy went over and picked up her 'Class Protector' award. I noticed the way she cradled the broken handle and winced. That award meant a lot to Buffy. I remember how happy she was when she received it. I looked at the boxes of stuff filling the house.  
  
"Well Buffster, looks like I'll be helping you move after all. Darn." Buffy looked up and gave me a smile.  
  
I grabbed a box and started collecting Buffy's stuff. The rest of the gang followed suit. Buffy reluctantly placed her award in a box and started picking up with the rest of us. After Buffy checked everything to make sure that her stuff was all there and that it was her's, we headed out.  
  
I started thinking. "So, all that other stuff in there? That's just gonna sit in there, right? Uh, I mean, no one owns it in the strictest sense."  
  
Oz frowned. "It seems wrong, somehow." I nodded. If we called the cops they'd probably just throw it out or impound it. Maybe even sell it, seeing as how dirty the cops are in Sunnydale.  
  
"We could donate it to charity?" The gang all looked at me in surprise. "Hey what would I do with a rowing machine?"  
  
I heard footsteps fast and hard on pavement. I turned in time to see Giles carrying a crossbow in one hand and a battle-axe and cross in the other running towards us. "Buffy! "  
  
  
  
"Hi, Giles." Called Willow chipper as ever.  
  
I raised an eyebrow at him as he stopped in front of us. "What's with the arsenal?"  
  
I was mildly amazed that he wasn't panting, but then again he is in better shape than he looks. Keeping up with a Slayer is no easy feat. "I've been awake all night. I know I'm supposed to teach you self-reliance, but I can't leave you out there to fight alone. To hell with what's right, I'm ready to back you up. Let's find the evil a-and fight it together. "  
  
'A little late aren't we G-man?'  
  
Buffy shared an amused glance with me. "Great! Thanks! We'll get right on that."  
  
We stepped around him and continue walking. Giles followed us. "The evil is this way?" He sounded confused.  
  
"My room is." I was impressed that she said it straight faced.  
  
Not to be out done, I said, "Which constitutes."  
  
"Hey Giles, could you get this box on top?" Willow did her best helpless little girl thing, and Giles folded for as much of it as he could see over the box in front of her face. He juggled his weapons and grabbed the box.  
  
I turned to Buffy and smiled. "So, college not so scary after all, hunh?"  
  
She smiled back at me. "It's turning out to be a lot like high school, which I can handle. At least I know what to expect."  
  
Max  
  
'I was lucky to get out of there. I should have known when Sunday challenged the Slayer and didn't kill her that it was time to hit the road.' I brushed some dust, what was left of Bret, off my shirt. He's stuck to the skull decal. Giving up on getting my fellow vampire wiped off, I started sneaking from tree to tree again. I wasn't about to wait around for the Slayer to catch up with me. Biting my lip, I looked out at the clear area between cover. 'Just have to chance it.' A couple of feet in, I heard a twig snap. 'Damn.' I turned. Two somethings hit my chest. Then there was pain. Hot burning pain that spread through my no longer working veins. I shook with the pain. I went down, unable to stop as my legs folded up beneath me. From behind the very trees I'd used to hide came three men dressed in camo and wearing ski masks. One was holding a rope, another a pistol, and the third held a rifle. Slowly they stalked towards me. I'd seen enough X-Files to realize I was in deep shit.  
  
Xander  
  
Standing on the walk outside Buffy's dorm, I looked up at her window. Buffy's self doubt about college was just a reminder of how she has a choice. I, with my grades and supposed lack of funds, have none. No, if I want to be here I have to be what they expect of me. I think the choices are the things that scared Buffy the most about college. She's used to not having any. The whole Chosen One destiny thing pretty much had decided her life for her. No matter how she rails against it I think she finds comfort in knowing exactly what her life entails. So she's gone her whole life following what was set before her only to get to college where you're not forced to do anything but have to do it of your own free will. I think it scared her and confused her. Made her feel inadequate. I can sympathize. I felt that way all through high school.  
  
My life has been, as it turns out, the complete opposite. I used to be wide open where she had to walk a narrow predefined path. I never had the luxury of knowing what my life was going to be like in the future, or Hell, even what it was going to be like the next day. My father wasn't going to force me to do anything since he just didn't give a shit and he certainly didn't have any expectations.  
  
'He has called me a worthless loser practically my whole life after all.'  
  
All he wants is for me to not be home as often as possible, which I willingly do. Then there was slaying. If I'd really wanted to I could have told Buffy to go to hell and no one would have been able to force me, or have wanted to, back into the dark. I was a nobody. No one no was going to come gunning for me like they did for Buffy when she tried to quit. Still I made my choices. I picked to fight the good fight not because I was destined to but because I wanted to. It was the harder path but I still chose to take it. Now I find my choices limited. My life has been defined for me by a twist of fate. The Gathering looms in my future, a thought that makes me sick to my stomach.  
  
'Betray my friends in a rather permanent way by cutting their heads off for some mystical undefined prize? No thanks.'  
  
There can only be one. Well I don't want to be the one who does the Reaping. For all I care the Game can go to Hell as long as it doesn't visit the Hellmouth. Yet I can't escape it anymore than Buffy can escape vampires and fighting. All I can do is try and survive it.  
  
Sighing, I turned away as the light went out in Buffy's room.  
  
tbc. ***  
  
I know this took a long time to get out, and a lot of people have been patiently or not so patiently waiting for it, I'm sorry but I'm a slow writer. I wouldn't hold your breath waiting for more. As I said I'm slow. However I'll try to get it out before next year. 


	2. Soul Eater Inc

A/N/N: Originally I had no intention of doing anything for the second episode of Season 4, but then I started working on other episodes and there were all these references to Kathy, Buffy's erstwhile roommate, and felt that it would be unfair to people who didn't remember the episode to just skip it or write a summary. So I decided to basically rewrite the episode using most of the same text and actions only changing things slightly to accommodate the things that happened to Xander. Therefore this is not entirely or even mostly my creation and do not claim that it is. Oh, and sorry for the wait folks.  
  
Summary: Sequel to Bloody Hell. We all know there's more to Xander than meets the eye. but his friends don't. He intends to keep it that way only life gets in the way, as usual.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything that belongs to Joss; I don't have enough energy to list it all. I'm making no money off this so if he tries to sue.all the power to him. His lawyers are about the only ones who'd profit.  
  
A/N: You might want to be slightly familiar with season four because that's when this story is based and some facts come directly from the show. I got all my information from BuffyWorld- a complete guide to all Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel episodes. So I'd like to thank them along with my beta Tray. ***  
  
Chapter II: Soul Eater Inc. (Till Eggs Do Us Part) Buffy  
  
If I hear 'Believe' one more time I'm going to scream. Cher's all well and good but hearing her 24/7 is clearly cause for justifiable homicide. I've got to get out. Slay some vamps. Relieve some pressure in a way other than killing my roommate. Grabbing my jacket, I head for the door. "Going out?" Kathy's ultra cheerful voice stopped me in my tracks. 'That girl's got to be on Prozac.' I turned back to my roommate and plastered a grin on my face. 'Quick girl come up with a reason other than her driving me to murder.' "Yeah. I'm seriously caffeine deprived. Figure I'd head down to The Grotto and get a jolt and, you know, do some studying. " 'I can't believe how lame that sounded.' "Oh. It's late...won't you be up all night?" Her face was scrunched up with what looked like genuine worry. I picked up my backpack. "Oh, yeah, but it's cool. I'm sort of an 'up' kind of night person. I mentioned that right?" Cause I don't want to have to play twenty questions for the next four years every time I have to kick demon ass. Kathy's expression didn't change one wit. "I guess I just didn't realize you'd be coming and going at all hours. Well, not that I mind. I'm just surprised." 'Now I feel guilty.' "I'll be quiet as a mouse, I promise. Ok." I tried making a break for it again. "Oh! Say, Buffy. I wanted to show you this little system I implemented." 'So close.' I turned back as Kathy pranced over to the nightstand and got a little notepad and pen and pranced back. "Oh, goody... system." Just what I need. I never did get the Dewey decimal thingy. Kathy's smile looked like it was going to crack her face it was so big. "Just log every call you make in here and that way when the bill comes it won't be a problem. I figure, 'Stitch in time...' " " '...catches the worm.'" I finished sarcastically. Kathy cheerfully gave me a "you got it" gesture my sarcasm going right over her head.  
  
'I guess sarcasm isn't going to work.' "You bet. Ok, then." I turned again. "Also..." she started. My hand hovered over the doorknob and it took all my willpower not to snap at Kathy. I turned around once more and resisted the urge to sigh. "I noticed that some of my milk was missing. Did you...." "Oh! Yeah, actually, I did. I meant to..." 'Oops. I didn't think she'd notice. What did she do, measure the level of milk?' Kathy looked kind of hurt. "No! It's totally ok, I was just wondering." "Yeah, I-I-I was making my coffee and I just...." It was kind of rude of me. Kathy nodded. "Buffy, it's fine. I just wanted to make sure..." The song ended and before I could give a sigh of relief Kathy headed over to the stereo to restart it, again. 'Damn.' She came back while I just stood there uncomfortable. " ...that we didn't have a thief or something." She went on as if she'd never stopped. "Like who? Sid the Wiley Dairy Gnome?" I joked. Kathy shrugged. "I don't know, it's no big deal. Please, feel free." Even as she said it I felt as if she didn't mean it, that she was disappointed. Creepily, it reminded me of Mom. "Ok, I'm really sorry. I have to..." I started to go, again. "Have a good time," she called to me, all cheer once more. "Yeah, you too. With ironing." I breathed a sigh of relief when I finally made it to the other side of the door. 'Demons are definitely easier to handle than roommates.' Kathy 'My sweater is absolutely ruined!' I frowned at the stains caused by Buffy's shove into the bushes. I'd followed her thinking coffee sounded good only to be attacked. We were just walking along then suddenly I was flying into the bushes, pushed by Buffy. In a way I was grateful for the save but I was seriously exasperated with this stain. I sighed after another scrub. My gaze fell on the rug. I felt a wave of irritation at the disdainfully turned up corner. I pushed the feeling aside and leaned down to straighten it. Satisfied, I looked back at my sweater. 'I will never feel satisfaction from that. It is ruined.' My gaze was drawn to Buffy's closet. 'Maybe.' Unfolding my legs I hopped off the bed. A few short steps and I was standing in front of Buffy's wardrobe. Pulling the bolt back, I opened it and began looking over the choices of clothing. Buffy has some nice clothes. I complimented her on her style. I took a sweater off the rod and when I turned it around to see it fully a bag on the floor caught my eye. More precisely, the crossbow sticking out of it caught my eye. Hanging the sweater on the knob for the moment I knelt to take a closer look. I opened the bag and pulled out the first thing I grabbed. It was the crossbow I'd seen sticking out. I reached in again and this time a wooden cross was in my hands. 'Well.' I paused for a moment, my thoughts ricocheting around in my skull. Then I put them back and grabbed the sweater. 'One for the other indeed.' A plan forming in my mind. Buffy It was nice and sunny on Giles' patio and that fountain was kind of pretty, but going through his mail just wasn't normally my idea of fun. I sighed and went over my findings. "Boring... boring... bill... bill... " I frowned to myself. I just had to get out from under the Kathy cloud. That girl makes Willow look like the most cynical slut in existence. Eager as a puppy and twice as naive. If she follows me out on patrol every night she's going to end up dead and it'll be all my fault. Not that I wouldn't mind getting her out of my hair. just not that way. 'I mean come on. She doesn't even swear! She completely ruined my slay. And I woke up to 'Believe'. Doesn't she ever get tired of that song? ' I was shocked out of Giles' mail by the man himself. In exercise clothes. I checked. . And yep he was wearing sneakers. I stared as he came up to me looking winded.  
  
"Hello," Giles greeted me, then stopped to take a deep breath. I couldn't help myself. "You run?" The thought of him doing anything other than reading a dusty book was slightly astounding. 'Okay he swings a mean axe but I've never actually seen him - exercise.'  
  
Giles gave me one of his patented small British smiles, the ones that let me know he's finding me particularly amusing right now. "And jump. And bend." He paused for another breath. "And, occasionally, frolic." A picture of Giles frolicking in a field with big blonde pigtails flopping around behind, wearing a blue checkered dress, a wicker basket looped in one arm a daisy in his other hand, a big smile on his face, and the light glinting off his glasses popped into my mind. I quickly banished the disturbing image and changed the subject away from frolicking. I grabbed the magazine I'd put aside earlier. "Ok, and, uh-" I held it up. "What's with the motorbike and scooter magazine?" Giles shook his head. "Congratulations, you've found me out. I'm a mod jogger."  
  
I frowned. 'What the hell is that?' "Ok, you're not having one of those mid-life things, are you? 'Cause I'm still going 'ick' from the last time you tried to recapture your youth." Definite ick. I'm SO glad I got there before they did anything.  
  
"Buffy!" Giles shouted indignantly, blushing slightly.  
  
I felt heat rise on my own cheeks. "Sorry," I mumbled. Better head right for the supposed reason I'm here. "Demon. Last night. Made with the pummeling, but he got away."  
  
Giles became all business. "What sort of demon?" Giles moved over to the fountain and sat on its edge. 'Once a Watcher, always a Watcher I guess.' Drawing up everything I remembered, I was struck by my lack of information. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. Hesitantly, I began. "Umm, had a cloak on, and glowing green eyes, and skin had a, like, super-bad fake rub-on tan."  
  
Giles rubbed his nose telling me he was annoyed. "Translate?"  
  
I felt my forehead scrunch up. This was California. Hadn't he ever seen a fake tan? "Orange-y?"  
  
He looked at me expectantly when I didn't leave. "Thank you. Anything else?" I felt I really should tell him about Kathy. The whole fiasco had me feeling out of sorts. I wanted someone to tell me what to do about her.  
  
"My roommate Kathy was there, but she didn't see anything," I said sulkily. I wanted to talk about it but I didn't. 'I seem to be two minds about everything lately.'  
  
"You took your roommate patrolling with you?" Giles looked scandalized at the thought.  
  
"Well, I invited the whole dorm, but she was the only one that could make it." The look on his face told me he didn't hear the sarcasm. I rolled my eyes. 'After more than three years around teenagers you'd think he'd recognize sarcasm of all things.' "I told her I was going for coffee and she decided to tag along," I explained.  
  
"Right." Giles looked uncomfortable at his slip. "Well, we should discourage her from that habit. From what you described, I-I'm not familiar with the creature, but I-I'll look into it and give you a ring when I've found something." Giles hit his knee, then got up and headed for his apartment. Boredom loomed in front of me. Desperate I called after Giles. "You know, it's nice out here."  
  
He turned towards me. "Yes, I take my tea out here sometimes." 'I'm not surprised.' Giles started to go again. 'No wait!' "What are you doing today?" That was lame. But it was the first thing that popped into my mind. Looking in high spirits, he turned back again. "Uh, it's a good day for me, actually. A friend of mine recently acquired an, uh, an original Gutenberg demonography..." My eyes were starting to glaze over and he noticed, stopping to take a deep look at me. I straightened, trying to look innocent and absorbed. Wary now, he continued. "And it suddenly occurred to me that you've never once asked me what my day's plans were, which leads me to inquire whether you're feeling entirely yourself. "  
  
"That's not true," I protested. "I ask about you all the time." He gave me a look and I tried to actually recall the last time I'd asked about him. "Ok, well, maybe the words don't actually make it out of my mouth, but I think about it."  
  
"And it's appreciated. Which doesn't explain why you're hanging around here instead of rushing off as usual." Giles looked very parental at the moment. He was pushing, for my own good. Times like these make me wish he really was my father.  
  
That doesn't mean I'm going to pour my heart out, right away. He's going to have to work for it. "It's no big. I just figured I'd hang here-you know-until my roommate goes to class." I dropped the clue.  
  
And he snatched it up like I knew he would. "Ah, I see." He sat back down on the fountain and just looked at me, letting me see his concern and understanding. 'He's worked enough.' I looked down at my hands. They were clutching each other nervously. "I know, it's probably just me having a bitch attack. But it's not... me." I'm feeling so guilty but at the same time I'm not. I really dislike Kathy. and it's not all my fault!  
  
"Buffy." I didn't look up to see his face but I felt the patience in his voice, "Living with somebody is never easy. Especially for an only child...." 'That's not it!' I looked up, some of my frustration leaking into my gaze. "Giles, listen to me, ok? When she sharpens her pencils she measures them with a ruler to make sure they're all the same size." God, she's anal.  
  
Giles blinked. "Which is fussy, I agree, but everybody has their idiosyncrasies. You'd do well to learn to tolerate them." I grinned wryly at him. "Or I'll end up an old lady who can only live with cats?"  
  
He chuckled a little. "Something like that." "Ok. You know what? You're right." I stood up. "Take a mental pic, this is the new Buffy. Kinder, gentler... roommate extraordinaire." 'You can sharpen your pencils all you want, Kathy. No more letting it get on MY nerves.' I smiled at Giles and he got up as well. "I'm sure you will be. Now head along before the birds take you as a permanent fixture." His fatherly smile gave me confidence and I headed off to face Kathy the pencil queen. Parker I watched a blonde duck behind a tray and smiled. 'The Rocket Café does it every time.' She was a little more muscular then my usual type but still quite a view. My smile grew bigger when she jumped into line in front of me. I took a quick peek behind me trying to see exactly who she was hiding from but gave it up. Too many people. Besides it didn't really matter, it was whoever's loss and my gain. "Ex-boyfriend? Or loan shark?" She jumped again, only this time because she was startled. She turned to face me, a puzzled look on her face, which in no way decreased her attractiveness. "Excuse me?"  
  
I gestured to the press of people around us, my smile still tugging at my lips. "The person you're hiding from."  
  
"Oh... both. Ugly breakup." She suddenly looked abashed. "I'm sorry, I just cut you..." She moved to get in the back of the line.  
  
"No, stay... stay. I'll watch your back." 'Along with everything else.' Before she could say anything more we were moved forward with the line. I watched her carefully as she picked her food. "Freshman, huh?"  
  
"Is it that obvious?" She looked startled again and I found that look appealing.  
  
Smiling at her, I nodded. "There are signs." I grabbed a box of Fruit Loops and stuffed it into my shirt. "For instance, people who've been around for awhile know how to use their dining hall card," I casually mentioned, even though I'm actually trying to get her in my good graces by helping her out.  
  
A little frown creased her forehead. "It's not for food?"  
  
"Work it right and you can get three meals worth, which equals fewer punch cards used annually." I let her in on this commonly known trick as if it were a great secret or as if I was the genius that thought of it. Well, anything to impress a girl.  
  
I received a nod and look of gratification for my troubles. "And more cash from dad which you get to keep for yourself."  
  
"Right! The goal is to polish off as much as humanly possible at one sitting. Enough to get you through the rest of the day, if necessary. while chipmunking items for future consumption." I slipped more food onto my plate, putting actions into words.  
  
"Ahh, got it," she said, grinning at me. Her smile was truly worth the wait.  
  
'More tips to keep her awed, Parker.' "Excess dry goods fit nicely in a backpack or your pocket." I grabbed a bag of pretzels and shoved it into my back pocket. "The wetter items - macaronis, your turkey loaf - then you're into Ziplocs. It's not for beginners." I didn't demonstrate, as it was a rather messy procedure, not something likely to impress either more like gag.  
  
"I'll just take it slow," she said, mock seriously.  
  
We got to the end of the line and I gave my card to Old Betsy who didn't give me a second glance. The girl I'd been trying to impress started looking around as Betsy finished up with her usual silent efficiency. I followed her gaze and saw a cute red head waving at her. The red head had a sort of sweet innocence thing going on and if I hadn't already seen whoever this knock out was, I might have made a try for her instead. Taking my eyes off the red head I looked at her dining companions. The guy next to her had dyed hair and was sitting rather close to her in a way that screamed boyfriend. He seemed vaguely familiar, but then with so many people who gravitate around in my circles just about everyone does to me. Looking past him I stopped and took a deep breath. 'Nick?' I took a closer look. 'No, not Nick. Shit, he could pass for my brother.' I could barely keep the shock off my face. The guy's dark features, high check bones, and angular jaw wouldn't have earned him a second glance at one of the family gatherings and for a moment my heart gave a lurch. 'What if he's one of my cousins?' The thought certainly wasn't pleasant, as the family wouldn't appreciate what I'd been doing. No one but the elders ever kept track of all the cousins and the possibility was there that he was one. I glanced at the girl trying to decide what to do. Her sunny smile gave me confidence. "So."  
  
"So, those are my...." She waved at the people waiting for her. "Are you..." I could tell she wanted me to come with.  
  
I felt a second of panic. I glanced at her friends. 'I'll try again, hopefully when he's not around.' "Oh, no, I have someone waiting. Otherwise I'd... heh, uh, Parker Abrams." Doing the polite thing I held out my hand. She gazed at it for a second then took it in a firm grip. "I'm at Kresge hall."  
  
"Buffy Summers, Stevenson." A name at last.  
  
I gave her my most winning smile. "Ok, well, I'll see you around, Buffy Summers of Stevenson."  
  
"See ya, Parker Abrams." She turned to go. I watched as her butt swashed as she walked. "You certainly will," I muttered to myself.  
  
Xander Coming on college grounds made me feel kind of like a trespasser. Not that I'd let anyone know that. My days of quivering in fear are over, at least in public. It's just that being among these hallowed halls reminds me that some people actually have to work for their knowledge, unlike me, who's basically inherited it all from someone who no longer had any need of it. I wasn't complaining. It just made me feel sort of guilty. but I never did get the hang of listening to my teachers. Most of whom thought I was an idiot because the years between kindergarten and fourth grade saw me learning from private tutors after school. My mother didn't believe in the public school system, being a product of private tutoring herself, and I had to beg her to let me go. Mom never looked at my public school report card so the whole thing was basically playtime for me. After her death the bastard didn't want to pay for anything that he could get for free and I was in public school full time. That's when my reputation for clowning around and never doing my work turned against me. Combined with the loss of the outside learning from people I respected (along with my mother), the scorn of my new teachers, and my belligerence in the face of their scorn, I didn't learn much during school hours after I turned ten. I graduated but did the bare minimum to do so. In later years when I might have begun to regret my actions in elementary and middle school, I basically didn't think much of it. I thought I was going to die an early death so there was no point in trying to make up those years. Ha on me. I was just lucky I acquired the memories of two people who had actually gone out of their way to be educated. Seeing my friends, though, was the reason I'd come - not to confront my feelings about my acquired memories. They were the whole reason I'd come back and I wasn't going to let a little thing like how I felt keep me from them.  
  
Finding them was easy enough, though they'd forgotten to give me their room assignments; I just hung around the cafeteria until one of them got hungry and showed up. Eventually Willow left her books at the call of her stomach. I saw that college life seemed to suit her; she was practically glowing with excitement. I smiled at Oz tagging along beside her. He looked as calm and unflappable as ever. I couldn't tell if college life was any different from high school life for him, not that I really expected to. His stance was guarded and every once and a while he shot a look at a party that seemed a little interested in Willow. 'How doggie of him. At least he hasn't marked his territory. I don't think Willow would appreciate the smell.' I, for one, knew that the competition eyeing my bud didn't have a chance. Wolves mate for life. Now that they've done the nasty Willow would no more stray than I'd . dress up like a clown and do the hula. I waited in the background, being an innocuous college student among the dozens of hungry college students, and checked to see that I was breathing and on the immortal side of my being. I'm not sure how much his lycanthropy affects his senses but I don't really want to take the chance that Oz would notice if I had no heartbeat. Controlling my life systems is no longer an unconscious part of me. I have to focus to make sure I'm breathing and such because my body no longer requires it. It's a form of muscle control and when I forget I find that my body does too. I slip into "dead". I guess it wastes less energy. It's like there are two things my body can do with itself- be immortal or be vampire. Why it has to drift to vampire is probably one of God's jokes on me. This strange duality comes in handy 'cause I can hide from both mostly hostile types by becoming the one they can't sense. I can even toe the middle line and be exactly neither at the same time. Now that one takes A LOT of concentration. It makes breathing a piece of pie with a cherry on top. I did a double check as they grabbed their food. When they were settled, I moved in. I made with the smiles as l plopped down in an empty chair besides Wills. "How's my best buds?"  
  
"Xander!" Willow half rose and hugged me. She then let go and smacked me on the back of the head. "Where have you been?"  
  
I rubbed the back of my head more in surprise than pain. "Jeez, Willow. What have you been doing here? Taking Cordy lessons?" I took one look at her frowning face and a bark of laughter escaped me. Several people from surrounding tables gave me looks that said, "there goes another one," and went back to their meals as if craziness was just another part of college life. 'Makes me suddenly glad I'm not going.' Willow now she looked slightly amused but she was holding on tightly to her indignation at being compared to Cordelia. "Ah, but who could teach that save for the Master herself? And clearly she's not here." Oz's dry comment made Willow's decidedly red face turn redder. "Too true." I decided to let Willow off the hook. "So how are you two?" Oz gave me a small smile and a shrug which I interrupted as, 'Fine. For now.' And I shook my head at my own ability to read his way of "speaking". I turned to Willow and she was practically bouncing in her seat. "I'm great. College's great." Enthusiasm smothered her voice. "Now there's the Willow I love." I gave her a kiss on the cheek and she blushed again. "Isn't that Buffy?" I turned my gaze from my embarrassed friend to look for the other one Oz had apparently spotted. Following Oz's gaze I saw Buffy talking with a guy. "Yeah. It is," I said coolly, assessing Buffy's new friend. Willow waved and caught Buffy's eye. Me, I focused on the guy. Maybe it's because of the way things tend to happen in my life - scratch that it's definitely because of the crappy way things tend to happen in my life - but it's made me paranoid. This dude was paying attention to our neighborhood Slayer. Now, he may have just been bitten by the love bug. Not entirely impossible, in fact it was rather likely. I didn't fall of my skateboard at first sight for no reason. However plenty of demons would take any opportunity to get close to the Slayer and then destroy her. He was to be watched. Buffy split from her new friend and weaved her way over to our table. She sat down between Oz and me. I gave her one of my trademark goofy smiles. "Hey, say hi to the non-college guy." Buffy smiled in return. "Not that I mind, but don't non-college guys usually populate the non-campus." Her tone was teasing but it stung nevertheless. 'If I didn't come on campus I'd never see you.' Instead of saying it I covered my hurt and stole a fry from Wills. As I munched I answered, "Usually. I just thought I'd come around and check on my girls." I gave Oz a tap on the arm to show I wasn't counting him among the girls but I was happy to see him too. Then I realized what I'd done. 'Oh, God. I'm beginning to speak Ozese.' "And eat off my plate." Willow put in trying to guard her fries as I made another supply run. "What's the deal, Xand, parents not feeding you?" Buffy teased and once more I marveled at how little she actually knew about my home life. 'Well it's not like you actually tell her anything.' My conscience put in. 'True. Wills never tells what she knows either.' Willow learned long ago that talking about home was not a good thing. I nodded, "Sure. For a price." The lie rolled easily off my tongue, which I rewarded with another fry from Willow's plate. 'And so the fiction continues.' Willow gave up on protecting her plate and I flashed her a grin. I waved a fry formally-known-as-Willow's in the direction of the guy she'd been talking to. 'Reconnaissance time.' "Doing some recruiting, Buffy?" I quirked an eyebrow at her. She glanced over her shoulder and turned back with a blush on her cheeks. I revised my judgment of his threat level up a notch. The ones that are nice at first hurt more than the ones who are evil from the start. Buffy shook her head in denial. "No big, just random adorableness." "Oh, a technique I know well. Hit the girl with your best shot, then hasta. " Her further blush told me I was right on the money.  
  
"Gotta respect the drive-by." Oz added. I nodded to him. "Low rejection, fond memories." I might not have done too well in the relationship department in high school but charming a girl for a few minutes, that I could do.  
  
"It looked like more than that to me. He got all googly-eyed." Willow protested. I grew up with a girl best friend. I spent most of my high school life surrounded by females. No way was I going to discount women's intuition. 'Crap. Gotta dig some more.' I turned to Buffy, "That's because he got hit by the Buffinator. Now he's powerless."  
  
"You think?" The hopeful tone in Buffy's voice sealed it. Potential trouble ahead. "No question, he'll be back." Oz said with usual certainty. Buffy smiled happy at her prospective new conquest. "Does this he have a name? Cause referring to him as he will be pretty rude if next we see him attached to your arm," I asked, trying to coax more out of her. "I'm glad you think so highly of my snaring ability. His name's Parker Abrams." Buffy face was covered with a happy little smile. "Oh, the sweet prince." I clasped my hands together and fluttered my eyelashes in false awe. I dropped my pose at Willow's giggle. "Seriously, don't worry. He'll fall at your feet." I gave Buffy a wicked grin, "especially if you throw him there." Buffy groaned and covered her face with her hands to smother her giggles. "So your budding romance aside, anything on the vamp front?" Buffy sighed, no longer laughing. "I did get jumped by a demon of non- specific origin last night." I looked her up and down. "Well you seem to be in one piece. So did this non-specific demon leave by its own volition or get chopped to itty bitty bits?" Buffy opened her mouth but it snapped shut as a strange girl set her tray on the table between us. She was a gawky, tall and skinny, with close a cropped head of hair, and a WAY too cheerful expression on her face. She looked like a future kindergarten teacher to me. "Hi, everybody." She gave us a little wave as she delivered her ever- cheerful greeting. The girl turned to get a chair and I shot a look at Buffy who was staring at the new girl with barely disguised dislike. Buffy swallowed her disgust by the time the girl had dragged her chair over and sat down. "Kathy." Buffy pointed to the girl and the newly christened Kathy gave me an extra cheerful look. "Xander." She pointed to me, the Exalted One. She pointed to the girl again. "Kathy, is my roomie." "Hi," Kathy said again with just as much pep. She stuck out her hand. I gripped it. "Hi, yourself." I frowned a little, still shaking her hand. I could feel her heartbeat through her skin. It seemed a little off. I glanced at Oz. I couldn't take the risk of going vamp with him here. 'She probably just has a murmur or something.' I let go and snatched Willow's last fry. Willow glared at me then turned to Kathy. "Hi." Oz tilted his head. "Hey, Kathy." "Is that my sweater?" Startled, I looked at Buffy. There was some real anger in her voice.  
  
Kathy looked down at the presumed article then back up, her expression the epitome of innocence. "I didn't think you'd mind, I mean you got mine all muddy."  
  
"I was saving you from a..." Buffy protested only to be cut off by a frantic Willow. "Bear!" Buffy gave Willow a long look. "Mugger," she finished. I smothered a chuckle.  
  
Kathy looked hurt. "It's not a problem, is it? I mean, I figured we're almost like sisters now, living together and everything." I looked at Buffy and could tell she figured no such thing. "No," Buffy said half-heartedly, "it's.it's fine. I just wish you'd asked." I got the distinct impression if Kathy had asked the door would have smashed her nose when it got slammed in her face. 'Oookay, time for old distraco Xando.' "So where're you from, Kathy?"  
  
Kathy twisted in her chair to face me. "Nebraska, originally." She gave me a big joyful grin then picked up a burger that would have made Larry proud of her tray. "Ahh, yes. Big sky country." 'That's about all I know of Nebraska.' Kathy smiled again and bit into her burger. A big red blob of ketchup oozed out and fell right onto Buffy's sweater. I looked past Kathy to Buffy. A look of pure dislike was on her face. Her eyes were narrowed on her sweater. 'Oh boy. I think this means war. I hope Kathy has Blue Cross.'  
  
Willow I rubbed the sore spot on my forehead as I hung up the phone. Listening to Buffy complain about Kathy is absolutely testing my limits. 'You don't hear me complaining do you?' My roomie is just as bad or worse. Ever since she got over her jet lag she has been throwing all night mixers, every night. I turned my gaze to the comforting dark outside the window. Compared to the flashing lights and booming noise of the party going on around me the night looked so much nicer. If I weren't afraid I'd be listed in the obits the next day I would be out there instead of staying in and. Suddenly the Nerf ball hit me in the head again. Growling I picked it up and threw it back at it's owner, hard. I was a little miffed when he caught it. 'I think I'll start asking for a new roommate yesterday.' Kathy When I got back from the communal bathroom I found Buffy quickly hanging up the phone. "Don't forget to log those calls." I wish she'd remember to do it on her own. Oh, well. I got on my bed and started flossing. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Buffy get up with an apple in hand and head to the refrigerator. I was suddenly hit by a draft. Looking for the culprit I spotted the open window above Buffy's bed. 'Well I can fix that.' Getting up I shut the window then hopped back on to my bed and grabbed my floss. 'She probably just forgot to close it.' I see Buffy is still at the refrigerator and smile. I'm not usually a proud person but putting my name on everything, even all my hard-boiled eggs, was a pretty smart idea. Now nothing will get mixed up. Buffy turned around and I saw her face had settled into a blank mask. She glanced at the window I'd just shut. Without preamble she strode over and swung it open again. 'How rude. She should know if I closed it I did it for a reason.' I frowned at Buffy as she climbed into bed. Caught up in my thoughts, I finished my last tooth before I realized it. Pulling the floss from my mouth I coiled it up and threw it in the trash. 'I'm going to be tidy at least.' I sighed at Buffy's sad manners and reached for my newest novel. Trying to pick it up, I strangely encounter resistance. Pulling harder, I was disgusted by the trail of gum that followed it from the table. "Ewww! Who left their gum here?" I looked accusingly at Buffy. She didn't say anything for a moment then shrugged. "Gum gnome?" "It wasn't me! It had to be somebody, Buffy!" I heard a gulp followed by an "I don't know" from Buffy's bed. 'Ohh, I thought I'd find another way but that's it. No more Mrs. Nice Kathy.' I slammed my gum covered book down and turned off the light. I was so angry I didn't even stop to clean the book. Buffy's light went off and all was dark. Buffy I almost told Willow no when she said that the gang was going to meet in the lounge to talk, now I'm glad I didn't. I'm not really a day person, probably a side effect of my being the Slayer, but then again I never really was a day person. Still, the nice comfy chairs of the open area lounge made up for the kind of icky out of body feeling I was experiencing. My dream flashed back on me as I told Oz, Willow and Giles about it. *Darkness all around. Bad tan demon with green glowy eyes leaning over me. Feeling helpless then tasting blood on my tongue. The scorpion crawling on my bare stomach. Feeling pinpricks of sweat form in time with its pincher legs steps. Bad tan demon back leaning over me. A twist inside me and something pearly white threading out of my mouth to be swallowed by the demon.* Shaking it off I started talking again. "So then after the scorpion, the demon opened my mouth and sucked some kind of weird light out of me. And the worst part? I wake up and there's Kathy, staring at me like I'm some kind of freak." *Do you always make that noise when you sleep?* Kathy's voice ground through my mind taunting me. Oz gave me a funny look, but then again most of the looks he gives anyone are funny. "Well, actually, for the worst part, I'd have to go with the demon poring the blood down your throat."  
  
Willow swallowed and looked a little green. "Me too, I would vote for that too."  
  
I snorted. "But that's just a dream, and this Kathy thing is real. All she cared about was that her precious sleep had been disturbed."  
  
Giles cleared his throat. "Perhaps it would be more productive to examine your dreams, um, determine their meaning." I opened my mouth to tell him demony dreams were not at all uncommon and analyzing it wouldn't do much good because when the thing was dead then the dream would go poof!  
  
Kathy popped out of nowhere. "You can read dreams? Neat." I ground my teeth at Kathy's fake admiration.  
  
I swallowed my distaste and introduced my roommate. "Giles, Kathy. Kathy, Giles."  
  
Willow jumped in. "He's our grown-up friend." She hesitated then hastily added, "N-not in a creepy way."  
  
Giles gave Kathy his politest British smile. "Nice to meet you, Kathy."  
  
Kathy smiled back with her usual sappiness. "Ditto. Maybe you could read the dream I had last night? There was, like, this monster, and he sat on me and did all this stuff to me." I rolled my eyes at her description.  
  
Oz raised and eyebrow. "Stuff like, scorpions? And Bloody Mary minus the Mary?"  
  
"That's it! How'd you know?" Kathy looked at Oz in awe.  
  
He just shrugged. "Well, I'm a good guesser."  
  
"Me too, and I'm guessing that you need to be on your way to class. Right, Kath?" My voice was snippier than I meant; no wait, it was just as snippy as I meant.  
  
Kathy looked at me patronizingly, "Hmm hmm, sounds like somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."  
  
"Hmm hmm, and guess what? You were next to it." I shot back.  
  
Kathy just kept looking at me pityingly, "You know, I do need to dash. My whole schedule is off because someone kept me up all night. Well, it's been fun. Toodles." She turned and left, finally. "Toodles." I growled at her back.  
  
Giles cleared his throat. "You know what this means...." He barely registered through my hatred. It did get through though and I nodded. "Yes. Not only does she take my sweater, but now she has to horn in on my dreams. She is the most ever mooch.... Oh, I haven't even gotten to the floss." I seethed as I began listing every little annoying thing about Kathy that was detestable.  
  
"Buffy, focus, please?" Giles sounded irritated. "If Kathy and you are having the same nightmares, chances are something happened to you both when you met the demon in the woods." I waved my hand at him, still caught up in my internal monologue.  
  
"So we need to figure out if this ritual they're dreaming about has some special use, or meaning." Willow said seriously. 'Willow's going all witchy on us.'  
  
I sighed. They didn't need me to help them analyze my dream pointlessly. I got up and gathered my stuff. "Cool, you guys can do the brain thing. I'm gonna go to class."  
  
"Which could also be construed as the brain thing." Oz pointed out.  
  
I shook my head. "Not when you're minoring in 'Napping 101.'" It wasn't that I was really anxious to get to class, it was more that I just wanted to be away. I gave them all a final look then went on my way, not realizing I was leaving some severely worried friends behind me.  
  
Raggitt (Bad Tan Demon) This dimension is very strange. The night is far too bright and the day. is not worth mentioning. The only good thing about those too bright hours is the heat. Why our prey would choose this place to run to is beyond me. At least the wood areas are dense enough to hide us from the humans and also serve as a way to warm the night hours. Fire is not something widely called for in our plane and I thank my ancestors that I had picked up the skill to create one. My cohort came up to the warming fire. He gave me a nod as he settled beside me. ^We were correct. She is the one.^ His lyrical speech was lovely to my ears after hearing the harsh words the humans used all day. ^Good.^ I communicated my happiness that we would soon leave this rock. ^I have prepared for the summoning of the great one, Taparrich.^ At my words we removed our hoods, letting our bald heads reflect the fire into the night. I turned to face the fire and my fellow followed suit. Together we began to speak the words to bring Taparrich forth. Buffy I dragged my feet a little after class, not wanting to be faced with Kathy. However I couldn't stay away forever; for one thing I had nowhere else to go. I paused outside my door when the haunting strains of 'Believe' assaulted my ears. A shudder went through me but I forced myself to turn the knob. Swinging the door open Cher hit me full blast and so did the sight of Parker half lying on Kathy's bed. My nostrils flared at the sight of them looking so cozy talking together in our room, alone. Parker was smiling, "Lots of popular artists don't get their dues. Madonna? Whitney?"  
  
Kathy was nodding her head in agreement. "That's so totally true."  
  
And me, I was ticked. The one thing I had she hadn't touched and now.. "Parker?" My voice communicated my disbelief at this final invasion.  
  
Parker looked up guiltily then climbed off Kathy's bed. "Hey, uh, I just dropped by to say... that. Uh, and bring you...." He gave me a box of plastic baggies. I looked down at the box incredulously. After consorting with my deadly enemy he was trying to give me Ziploc? "You know, to maximize your dining hall exports. They're heavy duty." Still a present is a present.  
  
I read the box for lack of anything better to do with it. "Plus freezer guard! That's so...." I looked up at him at a loss for words.  
  
Kathy got up and moved in close to Parker, almost touching him completely on his side. She looked up into his eyes but her words were directed at me. "Parker was just going to leave his number and go, but" her laugh was like nails on a chalkboard, "we started talking. He's such a blast, and time just flew." 'Flew. Oh girl you're going to fly, right out the window!'  
  
Instead of voicing my murderous thoughts I turned to Parker. "Time, really? How much time?"  
  
Parker looked guilty again. "Uh, I'm not sure, we sort of got caught up talking Red Wings. It turns out that Kathy's a closet hockey fan. I think it's the violence." He chuckled. I almost told him he was about to see some violence up close and personal.  
  
Kathy gave another laugh and I couldn't help my stare. 'Does she really think that's alluring?' "Quit it! I told you that was just between us."  
  
"It could be the sweaty men." His words were teasing and flirty. I couldn't believe Kathy was getting to him. Kathy laughed and shoved him. I couldn't stand it anymore. I pushed past them, making for my bed. "If you two are going to rassle, do you mind taking it outside? I've got a lot of work to do." My bitterness was reflected in my voice. I put my books on my bed and reached over to turn off the damn music. "Sorry, I didn't realize." He turned to leave. I could sense the hurt I'd inflicted on Parker and felt my own flash of guilt. I was just mad at Kathy not him, not really. "Oh, Parker wait. Look, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to...." I started apologizing.  
  
Parker shook his head and a small smile touched the corner of his mouth. "No, it's totally cool. I should go anyway."  
  
I swallowed my own pain now. "Well, it was great of you to stop by; m-maybe we could do it another time?" I asked almost plaintively. I didn't mean to scare off the one decent person I'd met here at college.  
  
"Another time for sure." Parker's smile became more genuine. Then he turned to Kathy. "Bye, Kathy." He gave her a little wave and I felt hate boil up. 'He gave her a wave! He didn't even say good bye to me specifically and he does to her!' Kathy waved back, awkwardly like a dead fish I was happy to note. "Bye, see- ya." I saw him out. When I closed the door an ominous click resounded through the room. I turned to face Kathy. For once she didn't look like her perpetually happy self. The same anger that was roiling through me was reflected in her eyes and I felt a sort of twisted triumph in knowing I was the one who'd broken through her mask.  
  
"It wouldn't have killed you to be nice, you know." She practically spat it, making no effort to reclaim her cheer.  
  
I rewarded her with a scornful look then moved to my bed and pulled out my new security. "Looked like you were being nice enough for the both of us. "  
  
Kathy moved over and shut MY window. "I wasn't moving in on your territory, if that's what you mean."  
  
I pretended to ignore her, closing my window as I placed my new padlock on the closet bolt. Hopefully it would keep certain people out of my closet. "Right. Just like you didn't destroy my sweater."  
  
Kathy pulled out her floss and started sawing back and forth. I went to my window and opened it again. Kathy paused in her flossing to glare at me. "I'm cold."  
  
"Well I'm hot. Deal with it." I snapped at her. I no longer gave a damn what she thought. She was the roommate from Hell.  
  
"Do you know what your problem is, Buffy." The way she said it made my name into a curse.  
  
I smiled at her, teeth bared. "You?"  
  
Kathy shook her head. "Hardly. Your problem is you're spoiled. Maybe the world revolved around you where you used to live, but it's share time now." She talked to me like I was a child. A not particularly bright child. 'I hate that.'  
  
I started to growl then something better occurred to me. "Share time, huh? Fine! I'll show you share time." I got up and went for the fridge. A nasty smile twisted my lips. I got out Kathy's milk, popped it open, put it to my lips, and started gulping it down paying no heed to the milk spilling down my front as it was pouring faster than I could drink.  
  
Oz I was attracted to Willow before I even knew her name or had even seen her up close. She drew me to her. Our relationship is the longest one I've ever been in. It's been close to three years now and I'm no less attracted to her. I never told her the reason I didn't go to summer school that year was so I wouldn't have to leave her side. She wouldn't have liked it so I didn't tell her. I also didn't tell her the reason I had to go to summer school in the first place was because I'd been planning my delayed graduation from the second month of our dating. She would have been livid over that. I've stayed by her side for all these years and I plan on doing it for as long as I live. I haven't told her that because I don't think she'd want to hear it just yet. When she is ready I will tell her. I will tell her over and over till she believes it. For now I am following her as she walks to her dorm. "You're worried about her."  
  
Willow turned to me startled at the sudden voicing of my thoughts. "Yeah, both of them. I mean, what kind of demon runs around putting ookie blood dreams into people's heads, like some kind of nightmare fairy? It's not right."  
  
"Well, I'm against it."  
  
"And Buffy's completely being not herself," Willow went on, worriedly. "If it wasn't for this English paper I'd be there right now. Um, listening. Doing the girly best friend thing." Willow's kind heart may not be the best spoken but it is bigger than any I have ever seen. We reached her door too soon in my opinion. I wish I could have convinced her to stay at my apartment but she insisted she couldn't. Her parents were paying for her dorm room directly. They would know if she wasn't in it. I'm surprised she would think so. I know how oblivious they are in regards to her and it hurts me because it hurts her.  
  
"Well, I can do that." I can't help the way her parents are but I can help with this. I many not be a girl and therefore it is impossible for me to do "the girly best friend thing" but I am a friend. Besides, it would ease Willow's burden if she didn't have to worry about Buffy.  
  
"You can?" Willow sounded hesitant but also grateful that I would volunteer.  
  
I gave her one of my "Willow-reserved" smiles. "Well, I'm not saying we'll braid each others hair - probably-" I let her think about that one for a moment as the mental image occurred to me as well, "but I can hang with her, watch for signs she's going over the edge."  
  
"You're the best." Willow practically glowed at me. Then she tilted her head in thought. "Oh, she's probably patrolling by now. Check around the science center. If you need me I'll be-" she opened her door and I flinched at the noise from the party. My ears sometimes are far too sensitive for my own good, "-at the library." She turned around and went back the way we'd come. For once I didn't follow her, though I wished I could have. I watched her retreating back until I couldn't see it anymore then turned to get to my own task. I was now Buffy-finder-extraordinaire. I walked the path around the science center, grateful for the lights illuminating it. It made all potential hostiles easy to see. Not that my night vision was shabby. I actually saw pretty well in the dark. However I appreciated the light, every little thing counted when the sun went down in SunnyD. I came alert as a triad approached: two men and a woman. They didn't have the feel of vampires but that didn't really count for much in this town. Vampires weren't the only things to watch for. I walked past them and relaxed when they didn't do anything. Only as I passed I felt something, something that seemed familiar. I kept walking but curiosity made me look back. The blonde woman was looking back and my eyes met her's. I turned around first. Her searching gaze had made me feel uncomfortable. 'Huh.' I thought to myself as I shook her eyes from my mind. It didn't take long to spot Buffy. Willow was right and she was patrolling. In fact she was REALLY patrolling. Inside I winced at the hungry look on her face. 'Taking out her anger by killing things. Not good.' "Buffy," I called to her. She looked up surprised. "Oz. Hi." I gave her a nod. "Hi." I fell in step with her and it was several seconds of painful silence before I realized Buffy wasn't going to talk. It's unusual for me to have to initiate conversation. Buffy usually can go on for hours. I shrugged. "So how are things with you?" That opened a floodgate I'd rather not have and Buffy detailed her latest argument with Kathy. I sort of got lost at the part with popular artists and didn't get found again until.. "...so then Kathy's like, 'It's share time.' And I'm like, 'Oh yeah? Share this!'" Buffy punched the air with enough ump to bowl over a small hippopotamus. I quirked an eyebrow at her. "So, either you hit her, or you did your wacky mime routine for her."  
  
Buffy looked a bit flustered, then she said, "Well, I didn't do either, actually. But she deserves it, don't you think?" She had the look of someone who had just vindicated herself.  
  
"Nobody deserves a mime, Buffy," I said in all seriousness. I had a cousin who was a mime for a month. Worst month of my life. The way Buffy felt Kathy deserved a beating set off an alarm in my head, though.  
  
"Hmm, Kathy does." Her expression was kind of nasty, then it lit with a happy smile as a thought occurred to her. "She deserves to be locked in an invisible box and blown away by an imaginary wind and... and...."  
  
"Forced to wear a binding unitard?" I ventured when it looked as if she wouldn't be finishing her statement any time soon.  
  
"Yeah, the itchy kind, it's perfect." She gave me a huge smile as if relieved that I was with her in Kathy-hating.  
  
"Just here to help." I felt slightly guilty about being here to watch for a break down. I really was here to help though, just not in quite the way she thought.  
  
"Which I appreciate." Her eyes narrowed as she looked at me. 'Uh, oh.' "But you've never come on routine patrol with me before, Oz. So, what's the deal?"  
  
"Seemed more interesting than homework." Which was true as well. Homework is a tedium only to be done as a last resort. I'm a tester, not a homeworker. Too much with the work.  
  
"As long as it's an elective. I can handle myself alone, you know." Her eyes were still narrowed at me. Buffy might not be the most observant but evidently she wasn't the dullest knife in the drawer.  
  
"Not in question." I assured her. Though internally I wasn't so sure.  
  
Buffy nodded to herself. "Good. So then, I go into the refrigerator-- right?--and the label queen has managed to put...."  
  
I favored her with a look. "Just a, just a thought, Buffy, but do you think all this ranting is scaring away potential demons?" Buffy stopped and I joined her in the stillness. "You're right." Her face did that scrunch up thing it does when she's truly angry. "Ooh!" I calmly noted her hands balling into fists. "She's even affecting my work, now. She's the Titanic. She's a crawling black cancer." Her leg shot up in a move that would have made Cordy, Queen of the high kick, proud and swung around to smash it into an innocent park bench. Wood splinters flew and the two wood heaps became formally-known-as-bench. "She's... other really bad things." I turned my gaze back to Buffy but her flashing eyes were focused elsewhere telling me she apparently hadn't noticed the untimely demise of the bench.  
  
"On the plus side you've killed the bench, which was looking shifty," I quipped, trying to cut through the murderous mood hanging around Buffy.  
  
Buffy glared at me and I got the uneasy feeling that if Kathy had been standing behind me my life would have been worth nadda. "This isn't funny, Oz. Something has to be done." She stalked away. I watched her rigid shoulders and noted her terse gate as she moved away from the unfortunate bench and me.  
  
"Agreed," I said softly. I looked at the bench for a final time then began trotting after her. Kathy would make more of a mess than the bench both in the literal sense and in the sense of Buffy's life if Buffy decided to take a heel to her. Kathy 'Darn these nails. And darn her.' I glared over at Buffy who was tapping her pencil on her book. The booms were getting louder with every hit. It was driving me insane. Finally I couldn't take it anymore. Putting the clipper down, I hopped off my bed and strode over to my CD player. I felt a supreme sense of satisfaction as I turned it all the way up then hit play. Cher drowned her out for me. Turning back around, I barely contained my smirk as I folded up on my bed again. Suddenly the tapping was back and I glanced up to see Buffy was hammering her pencil down increasingly hard. I felt a flash of irritation, which was quickly replaced by another flash, this time of smugness, as her pencil snapped. Buffy dropped the pieces of her pencil and grabbed a pair of earmuffs. I curled my lip. 'What kind of person doesn't like Cher?' Choosing to be the bigger person I ignored her slight to Cher. 'I want an egg.' Getting up once again I passed Buffy, who took the time to shoot me a glare, and grabbed the fridge door. Inside I was happy to see were all of my items still neatly labeled. Taking an egg out, I went over to my desk so it'd be easier to clean up the shell fragments afterwards. I began rolling it over and over again on the hard wood trying to crack the whole shell. My name looked rather neat with hairline fractures running through it but sadly to eat the egg I had to de-shell it. 'Bye bye egg.' I began ripping away its covering. A thunk dragged my attention from my egg and I turned to see that Buffy had thrown her muffs down in a fit of pique. "I'm going to bed," she announced like she was the Queen of Siam proclaiming something to her subjects. I glared at her as she got into bed and shut off her light. 'I can't wait till the transfer's complete and I don't have to live with her anymore.' Willow Kathy had ambushed me in the hallway. Now I was trying to think of a polite way to tell her to leave me alone. I needed to get to class. I bounced on my toes and looked around at the passing traffic as Kathy delivered her tirade. "I do what I can, but Buffy's difficult. She's secretive, for one thing, she comes in at all hours of the night, and she leaves her gum all over the place." I knew Buffy had a good reason to be secretive. 'Wait. does Buffy chew gum?'  
  
I shook off that thought. Things sounded bad. I had to try to divert what was starting to look like a full-blown war. "I-it sounds like things are rough, but don't you want to be talking to Buffy about this?" At that moment I saw Buffy coming towards us in the stream of students.  
  
"I would," Kathy protested, sounding very self-righteous, "but she is so touchy about all kinds of weird stuff. I mean sometimes I get the feeling that she is not quite normal. You know?" I was getting nervous with Kathy's pointed questions and Buffy staring at me from the other end of the hall wasn't helping. "Well, normal is relative. Right?" My voice sounded squeaky to my own ears. I turned fully to see Buffy and Kathy followed my gaze.  
  
"Later, ok?" she whispered to me as if I was a fellow conspirator and hurried off. I almost sighed in relief but then Buffy walked up and turned abruptly towards Kathy.  
  
"Why were you talking to her?" Buffy demanded accusingly.  
  
My worry for my friend intensified. "Buffy, come on, we were only just saying hi," I said, trying to calm her down.  
  
Kathy turned around for a second. "Yeah, that's what she wants you to think." Then she was gone but her parting shot enraged Buffy. Buffy continued to stare where Kathy had been, cold fury on her face. Dread filled me as I looked for my friend and couldn't see her in the person in front of me.  
  
"Buffy, this has to stop," I pleaded with all my heart. "I mean I-I get it, I have a sucky roomie, too." I reached out to her, trying to get her to see reason. "But you just have to deal."  
  
Buffy's face lost its rage. It became a determined mask. "You're right, I've been thinking a lot about this and it's clear to me now."  
  
"Good, that's better." I smiled in relief. I'd gotten through to her.  
  
"Kathy's evil." Buffy's words pounded into me like fists. "I'm an evil fighter. It's simple... I'm gonna have to kill her." I stood there in stunned silence for the few seconds it took to fully process that she'd said what I thought she'd said. "You have to kill her?" I couldn't believe those words had come out of her mouth. "Don't you think you could just switch rooms, or something?" I said desperately.  
  
Buffy looked at me as if she was proud of herself. I felt sick to my stomach. She leaned in close. "Well," she said, as if she was letting me in on a grand secret. "I would, but it's not just me in danger from Kathy. Look." She pulled out a plastic baggie containing what looked like toenail clippings? "Toenails?" I croaked out hoarsely.  
  
Buffy nodded as if I'd finally got it. "Evil toenails." That absurd statement didn't sound quite as absurd as it should have because I could see the fanatical gleam in Buffy's eye and knew she was serious. "I took them off the floor last night when she was in the bathroom. She thought I was asleep."  
  
"Good thinking, 'cause in the middle of the night those toenails could have attacked you and left little half-moon marks all over your body," I managed to joke, I don't know how  
  
"Don't be ridiculous," Buffy scoffed. "The point is I measured them before I fell asleep and again this morning, and they grew. After they were cut! That's a demon thing, she has to be eliminated." 'Oh god she thinks she's got proof. What am I going to do?' Thinking fast I decided to do the only thing I could to prevent a homicidal Slayer from killing an innocent person.  
  
"Of course. I-it makes sense, now." 'I can't believe I'm humoring a lunatic.' "But you better show those bad puppies to Giles before you do anything just to be sure." 'I'll call ahead and warn Giles. Maybe he can come up with something to get rid of whatever demony thing is causing this.'  
  
"Absolutely. I don't want to do anything crazy." I almost couldn't believe the craziness of that statement.  
  
"Uh, you hurry on to Giles," I managed to get out with out panicking. "I'll hang here and-" I thought fast. I needed something to keep her from guessing I thought she was under demon influence. Something she'd believe.. "-and keep an eye on Kathy," I finished with only a slight pause.  
  
Buffy didn't notice, she was so caught up in her own confidence of Kathy's evilness. "Great. Good. Thanks, Will." She turned and headed off to Giles and I swear she was swaggering. I watched to make sure she was gone then went for the nearest payphone. I punched in a number I'd memorized between Apocalypses and waited nervously as it rung. 'Come on. Come on.' Relief flooded me when Giles' voice came over the line. "Hello?" "Giles," I practically gushed in my relief, "I-I just talked to Buffy and," I glanced in the direction she'd went, "yeah, I think she's feeling a little... insane." "I know she's been. out of sorts lately but.." Giles said trying in his British way not to say she'd been acting like a bitch. Me, I had no problem saying it. Not now when she was acting much worse than bitchy. "No." I shook my head even though I knew he wouldn't be able to see me. "Not bitchy crazy, more like homicidal maniac crazy. So I told her to come to you. Kay?" I heard Giles take a deep breath then let it out. He didn't say anything for a few long moments and I began to worry that he didn't have any more idea what to do with a homicidal Slayer than I did. And that was not reassuring. Giles was plan guy. He was supposed to have a plan. "That's alright, Willow." His voice was very soft and his accent very pronounced when he finally said something. I released a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding. "I'll contact Xander and Oz. We'll come up with a way to restrain her until we can find some way to reverse this. You might want to warn this Kathy to lay low for a while as well in case. in case it doesn't work." There was a pause when neither of us could think of anything to say. "Be careful," I whispered to him. I had no clue how Buffy would react to what she'd see as her friend's betrayal. She'd practically ripped my head off when I was just talking to her "enemy". "Yes. Of course. Good luck." Then the dial tone was ringing in my ear. I pulled the receiver from my head and looked at it. "Good luck," I said to it then solemnly hung it back on its hook. Xander I was laying in wait for a potentially unbalanced Slayer. Not one of the smarter things I'd ever done. Still, Oz was waiting with me, along with the ever-redoubtable Giles playing bombardier. Oh yeah that made me feel A LOT better. I've faced a deranged Slayer before; it's not good for the body. I heard a creak as Giles' door swung open and glanced at Oz. Of course he'd heard it too and I nodded to show him I was ready. There were footsteps then, "Giles? Anybody home? Hello?" I heard a muffled thud and knew Giles had dropped the net from his second story perch. 'God I hope he didn't miss.' I took off down the hall, Oz at my side. We reached a struggling Buffy just in time. She almost had the net over her head. Taking a chance, I body slammed into her and Oz followed my example. Giles hauled ass getting down the stairs and helped us get her hands behind her back. Freeing one hand from restraining Buffy I grabbed the slipknot hanging from my pocket. 'Soldier boy strikes again.' I forced the rope over Buffy's wrists.  
  
"What are you guys doing?" Buffy cried, fury and confusion in her voice. "This is... this is ridiculous." She jerked her hands trying to escape the rope but I pulled it back, putting a bit of my real strength into it.  
  
"Buffy, this hurts me more than it hurts you," I told her truthfully. I always assumed if one of us were going to go nuts, well, that it'd be me.  
  
"Not yet, but it will." Buffy's voice was deadly.  
  
"Don't say that," I said. Then her words really penetrated my brain. "Oh, PLEASE don't say that." A Slayer was mad at me, as the Thing would say I was going to be in for a world of hurt.  
  
"We're doing this to stop you from making a terrible mistake," Giles gently assured Buffy as we removed the net and maneuvered her over to a wooden bench with a back. "Clearly something is amiss." I snorted at that statement as I tied the loose end of the rope to the back of the bench. 'Oh yeah, "amiss".'  
  
"Yeah, something's amiss here." Buffy glared at us and jerked forward. "A 'Miss Kathy Newman.'" Her voice was mockingly sweet. "Giles." She jerked again twisting towards Giles. "Ow." She winced as the white nylon rope tightened on her wrists. "Giles, look in my bag." Oz and I shared a worried glance while Giles looked at her for a moment then went over and picked up her bag. "Look in the bottom pocket of my bag." Giles opened the pocket slowly. "She has parts that can grow after they're detached," Buffy insisted as Giles pulled out a baggie with apparent nails in it. "She irons her jeans. She's evil. She has to be destroyed."  
  
Giles motioned to Oz and I and we went off to the side. I noticed he was still holding the baggie, and yep they were nails. "I fear the demon that Buffy met in the woods has somehow possessed her," he whispered to us.  
  
"Lite FM. Love songs. Nothing but love songs. " I heard Buffy muttering to herself.  
  
"You think?" I almost pointed out that it must have taken days for her to get this bad and know one had thought to contact me, just in case she went completely wacko and decided to go on a killing spree, but there was no real point. Even if they'd tried I wouldn't have been available. In fact, they'd been lucky to catch me for this. "Um, you stay and watch her. I-I know a spell that will make the possessing demon reveal itself so that we can fight it, but I-I need to get some supplies from the magic shop." Giles turned to the tied up lady in his living room, which under different circumstances would be really kinky. "Buffy, I... see you around." Giles finished stuttering and left, leaving Oz and I all alone with a mad Buffy. "So anybody want to play I Spy?" Wasn't my best one-liner but at the moment I was busy worrying about when Buffy was no longer tied up. Her glare illustrated quite clearly she was listing ways to kill us in her head. I was hoping she wouldn't think of dismemberment. "I can't believe this, after all that we've been through together and you guys won't believe me when I tell you that Kathy is bad." Buffy spat at us.  
  
"We want to, Buff, it's just..."  
  
Oz interrupted me. "Shh, don't engage." 'I haven't been there. I don't know. Better safe than sorry.' I finished in my head. Buffy started putting a little more effort in her struggles and the bench started rocking. 'Ah, I don't know if those knots will hold against Crazy Slayer.' A slipknot would hold a normal person but watching Buffy I couldn't help but worry. 'Maybe I should tighten them up again and put a little more oomph behind it this time.'  
  
"I don't know if I tightened those ropes enough," I said to Oz.  
  
Oz managed to look concerned. "Then we'd better go over there and check 'em."  
  
I nodded. "Avoid the legs," I advised him. 'Should have bound those too.' We approached from opposite sides. I leaned over to check the ropes. I saw Buffy's arms move free of the bindings but she was too quick for me to duck. My head slammed into something hard and unforgiving and the world began to fade out in a red haze. My body ached as I fell backwards, crashing into the hard wood floor. 'I think she cracked my skull.' I thought fuzzily. Something landed on my chest. "Nope, not tight enough." Buffy's voice drifted down to me and then I was gone. Willow 'I hope this insanity is not catching.' I guess it doesn't really matter. I have to warn Kathy. I raised my fist and started knocking, tentatively at first then harder and faster as my fist became the fulcrum of my fear. I was startled when the door opened. I almost smacked Kathy in the face but managed to check my fist just in time. I took a deep breath. "Can I come in?"  
  
Kathy glanced up and down the hall suspiciously then nodded. "Sure." Kathy stepped back, letting me in. I stood nervously in the middle of the room. She shut the door and turned to me. "Where's Buffy?" The words came out bitter and sort of eager. Inside I groaned at the confirmation that Kathy was being possessed too.  
  
"I don't know, exactly," I fretfully told the truth. 'Hopefully wrapped up at Giles'.' "But I've been thinking, it might be a good idea for you and Buffy to give each other some apart time. In fact, you might want to be, uh, apart before she gets back." 'So she doesn't rip you, ah, apart.'  
  
Kathy glared at me. "What do you mean? I should leave the room? Why should I go?" She started towards me looking as if she was ready to kill the messenger.  
  
'N-not good.' "I-it's not fair, I know," I said, backing up.  
  
"You bet it's not fair," Kathy snorted, doing a fair impression of a raging bull, "having to live with someone who's obviously troubled. Someone who so clearly needs to be in a home, not in a dorm." She stomped her foot down.  
  
"I don't know about that. Uh, Buffy's going through something, yes, but...." I said defending my friend and at the same time trying to defuse Kathy.  
  
"I wouldn't put it past her to drop out, or take off or something." Kathy's eyes took on a speculative gleam. "Do something horrible to herself." Her eyes were almost merry at the prospect. 'Definitely not good.'  
  
"Herself?" I whispered.  
  
Kathy sagely nodded. "Or worse. She's capable of it, you know? You can see it in those shifty little eyes of hers. One of these days she might even push somebody too far." I let out a breath in relief when the phone rang. Kathy went to answer it and I considered what she'd said. Buffy was most certainly capable of hurting people, with her strength, but she'd never hurt a human. okay, she would. At the moment she was under the influence. As for the pushing, the only ones who seemed to be out to get her were the demons that wanted to kill the Slayer before she killed them and, well, Kathy.  
  
"Hello?" Kathy chirped into the phone. She listened for a moment then held out the receiver in my direction. "It's Oz." I frowned and reached out to take it. I put the phone to the ear. "Hi." I was glad to be talking to a non-crazy person. "You don't have to worry. We tied Buffy up for now." Oz's calm voice reached out to sooth my nerves. "You did?" I looked at the ceiling. 'Thank God.' "Yeah. We're at Giles'." My boyfriend, master of the few words. "She's at Giles, uh, ok. Bye." I turned my eyes away from heaven and found Kathy was eyeing me strangely. 'I think I'd better leave before she starts thinking I'm guilty by association.' "Bye." I barely heard Oz as I hung up the phone. I smiled at Kathy reassuringly and started edging for the door. "You know, during that really short phone call I realized you are so right. I mean, it's not fair to make you leave your own room. So, you're good. You just stay, right there. Kay?" I made a break for it, bolting through the door. Raggitt The summoning spell is one of the lengthiest and most mind numbing ever created. Chanting for days is most harrowing and I could not help wishing, in those long hours when nothing was heard but our voices repeating the same passage over and over, that the elders would get around to revising the spell. Finally my partner and I uttered the last words to the spell. Our words were no longer lyrical they were more akin to harsh grating but I sighed in relief at hearing them. Keeping the fire going while chanting had been a real joy and as the ground started shaking I fuzzily worried the spraying dirt would put it out. I wasn't too demon to admit I was dead with exhaustion. Suddenly from the split in the earth Taparrich appeared. His rich black robe designated his higher status. As he towered over me I couldn't help but wonder at the need. He excreted his power. All who stood in his presence would know him. ^Where is She?^ The air vibrated as Taparrich spoke and I was glad that I was not the object of his search, as his wrath was also legendary. My partner made no move. I stepped forward. ^With the humans, my lord. I will show you.^ I said, relieved my voice was recovering and no longer sounded like a human's. I waved my hand, calling the image I had obtained following our prey. The resting place was replicated in careful detail several feet above the ground. Taparrich tersely nodded and made a motion. A traveling portal materialized beneath his feet and he went to bring back his quarry. Kathy I didn't even glance up from my book when Buffy came into the room. I knew it was her. I could smell her. "Kathy." Buffy spat out. "Buffy." I looked up and sneered at her. She disgusted me.  
  
"I think we need to talk, don't you?" I saw her fists clenching and I knew what kind of "talk" she wanted. I wanted the same kind. I swung my legs off my bed and got to my feet.  
  
"Absolutely." I grinned at her. "Let's talk."  
  
Buffy returned my grin and kicked up a corner of the throw rug. I looked down at her deliberate sloppiness and felt a cold rage settle in my stomach.  
  
"Oops, look what I did," Buffy said sweetly. I yanked my head up and backhanded her across the face. Her head jerked to the side. 'Look I can flip things over too.'  
  
"Huh, look what I did," I said, just as innocently. She reached for me and I reached for her. I got a hold of her head at the same moment she got mine. I felt a grim sense of determination fall over me as I prepared to wrench her head off, only to be beaten to it by that wench. I lost my balance as Buffy lost her grip on me and we both stumbled back. The air felt strange on my suddenly exposed and raw face. The light was too bright but I could see my human mask in her hand. Buffy looked down at my very expensive mask then back up at me. "I knew it!" she cried triumphantly, shaking my mask at me in her fisted hand. 'That--that-ooh I'm going to get her!' I charged forward, intent on beating the crap out of Buffy. I hit her around her middle and she flew back into the wall. Before she could move, I straddled her. I wrapped my hand around her throat but she kept struggling. "Quit it!" I said impatiently.  
  
Buffy kept wriggling, trying to buck me off. "I knew it! I knew you were one of those demon things." She spat clawing at my hand.  
  
I rolled my eyes. "Oh, why don't you just stuff it and let me finish my ritual."  
  
"Ritual?" I got some real pleasure out of the confusion on Buffy's face. It didn't last though. "My nightmares.they were real." A little bit of guilt hit me. I might as well explain. "I'm sorry, ok? I left my dimension to go to college and they sent these guys after me. They can tell who I am because I don't have a soul so I'm borrowing yours."  
  
"Without even asking." Her tone screamed how typical and any guilt I felt disappeared. She deserved it. "Tonight, when they come looking for me, they'll take the one without a soul." I gloated.  
  
"Well, thank God I won't have to watch you floss anymore," Buffy retorted.  
  
"And I won't have to live with a slob," I shouted back at her, furious. Suddenly Buffy wrenched beneath me and my hand slid off her throat and up to her chin. She took advantage of the slip and sunk her teeth into my hand. 'Ahhh..' I pulled my hand back, realizing too late that wasn't a good idea. Abruptly I was flying. My back exploded in pain as I landed on the end of the bed. Buffy's foot caused another burst of pain as she planted it in my stomach. I smacked her foot and she fell back away from me. As she scrambled back to her feet, I got to mine. We stood facing each other for a few seconds then Buffy twitched, telegraphing her charge at me. I grabbed her wrist and flipped her over onto the bed she'd thrown me into. I underestimated her and she bounced off using her momentum to deliver a kick to my face then following through with another to my side. I threw a punch but Buffy ducked it and I growled to myself. I was aching all over. She threw a punch of her own that I had to block with my forearm. My whole arm tingled from the blow. Buffy was a lot stronger than she looked. Desperate, I grabbed Buffy's head and threw her back. Buffy flew across the room and through her closet. "It's share time, Buffy," I sang out. I ran over to finish this. Gripping her feet, I pulled her out of the closet. "Fine, let's start with my sweater." 'What?' Buffy twisted her feet out of my hands and got up, her ketchup-ruined sweater in her hands. She flew forward and wrapped it around my neck. I choked for a second as she tightened it, cutting off my air. Then I grabbed the two sides of the sweater and ripped it apart. I smirked as I took a deep breath and Buffy stood holding the pieces of the sweater.  
  
"Oh!" she cried, stunned. I closed my hands around both her arms, picked her up, and threw her back down on the floor. Buffy made to get up and I savagely kicked her face. Still furious, I grabbed the phone and straddled her again. Then I started smacking Buffy across the face with the handset. *Whack* "All you had to do was," *Whack* ",write," *Whack* ",down," *Whack* ",your," *Whack* ",calls!" Throwing the phone aside, I pulled her up by her hair and threw her against my desk. My pencils rattled to the floor. Buffy managed to stay on her feet. "Ah-hah!" she cried and brought her heel down on my scattered pencils. They broke beneath her feet. 'Bitch.' I took a swing at her but she blocked me. Buffy's hands gripped the sides of my head and twisted me around. My jaw exploded as her fist delivered an uppercut. I soared back, crashing into my bookcase. My books scattered and splinters dug into my back. Something was crushed under my hand. I looked down and saw my ceramic dog Fluffy. Rage filled me and I threw myself at Buffy. She was caught off guard and I plowed straight into her and kept going. We crashed into the door, which amazingly held. 'Must be oak.' A muffled shout came through the walls. "Do you mind? People are trying to study!" I picked Buffy up and ran her across the room, slamming her into the window. The glass cracked and broke, leaving Buffy lying on the sill. I grabbed her and pulled her off the sill. "The window's open. Happy?" I threw her again, this time over my bed. She landed against the side of her own. I leapt over to her and started prying at her jaws. "Open up! Let me finish!" 'I need to finish. YES!' Buffy's mouth opened. Xander The top of my head was tingling, that was the first thing that I felt. 'Damn, she smacked me good.' I sat up and immediately regretted it as the room started spinning. I brought my hand up to my forehead to try and ease the pounding. I heard Oz starting to stir beside me. 'Going by the pain I'M in it's a good thing he's a werewolf or I'd have to call an ambulance. Either Buff doesn't know her own strength, which I seriously doubt, or payback really is a bitch.' "Oow... why couldn't Giles have shackles like any self-respecting bachelor?" I winced at the sound of a door slamming. It seemed to vibrate through my brain. Light, yet hasty footsteps told me who exactly was coming, even if they were slightly louder than usual. Definitely Willow.  
  
Willow started babbling even before she entered the room. "Guys, I just saw Kathy and she's acting... Oh my God, are you ok?" She rushed over and helped Oz to his feet. 'What about me?' But Wills ignored me all together, fussing over her boyfriend. 'Boy is she overreacting. Doesn't she remember the whole 'only silver can kill a werewolf' thing?' I shook my head. 'Well I guess I'll just have to help myself up.' I did a quick roll and hop to get to my feet. I felt a slight wave of dizziness but it passed. 'Ah the wonders of an immortal constitution.' I glared at Oz who looked as if nothing had happened to him at all. 'Apparently not as good as a werewolf one.' "Yeah, Buffy's got a pretty good lead on us, though." Oz broke the news to Willow.  
  
Willow blanched as she realized what that meant. "I-I'll call Kathy, tell her to get out of there." She shuffled to the phone and started dialing. She let it ring, and ring, and ring but finally she hung up. Willow turned to us her face grave. "No answer." The door slammed again and a disheveled Giles rushed in the room. "Toenails!" he blurted as if it would explain everything. I was in a big state of non-comprehension. Apparently Giles realized toenails wasn't going to solve it for us and held up a baggie. "Buffy was right." He handed the baggie to Willow. She held it like it was a bomb that would explode if she twitched. "Kathy's toenails not only keep growing after they've been cut, they actually regenerate after they've been destroyed."  
  
Willow squinted at, well the toenails. "And that's a demon thing?"  
  
Giles nodded, "Oh, unequivocally yes. So... where is Buffy?" I held up the piece of rope I had found on my chest, which Buffy had thrown on me when I was down. "Oh dear, we have even less time than I feared." He reminded me of the rabbit from Alice in Wonderland, scurrying off for a very important date as he disappeared into his kitchen. Giles began grabbing stuff at what looked like random to me. "I've looked up all known regenerating demons. Only one species practices the ritual Buffy's been seeing in her sleep. It's used to steal the soul from a human body."  
  
"Wait." I held up a hand. "Are you saying that Buffy's been doing a Linda Blair on us because Kathy's been sucking her soul?"  
  
Giles set his stuff on the table. "I believe so, yes. Excuse me, please." He brushed me aside to move some furniture around.  
  
"So Buffy was right all along. Later on, big remorse," Willow said.  
  
Giles picked up a book. "Now, I've found a spell that should reverse the soul transfer procedure immediately." He gave the book to Willow. 'Why is he giving all the stuff to Wills today?' "Willow and I will perform it at once." 'All right. That's a good reason.'  
  
"Leaving Xander and me to help Buffy in the flesh," Oz stated. "Oh yeah, that's what I want to do. Help a Slayer who'd rather play ping- pong with my eyeballs for tying her up and calling her crazy." I shook my head at the absurdity of it. "Well, Dogboy, we're off to save the Slayer, maybe." Oz gave me a rather odd look as I headed out with a smile. 'Don't worry. I'm not insane. I just look that way.' Giles I'd acted as a sort of surrogate father for all of. the Scooby Gang, for lack of a better description. I thought of all of them as the children I'd never had, but Buffy holds a special place in my heart. I'm duty bound to protect her and fight with her. Now because I hadn't believed her she may have lost her very soul. Not something any father wants for their child, I'm sure. I leant over the book I had handed to Willow more to reassure myself than to actually read the necessary words. Trying not to show my nervousness, I turned from Willow and the book and began lighting the candles. Unable to resist I glanced at Willow and saw in her face the same fear and determination I was feeling. Taking a deep breath, I began speaking the words to return our Buffy to us and reverse the spell of the Mok'tagar demon. "'Hear me, elders of the upper reaches... elders of the lower reaches... elders of the dry land... elders of the river flats.'" I took the required pause. "'Ancients, I beseech you. The soul, abstracted. Let it revert to its true seat.'" The pause after this verse was spent swallowing my fear. "'Let it be finished. Let the unnatural vessel be emptied, let the essence be returned to its original host.'" The spell was simple and over. But I had no way of knowing if it was successful.  
  
Buffy My jaws were throbbing along with the rest of me. Kathy was holding them apart, and I knew that wasn't good. Kathy tried to do something but suddenly the white misty thing from my dream poured into me. 'Is that my soul?' I felt more complete than I had in days but sort of like a hand in a new glove, all turned around and not quite filled in yet. Kathy fell off me spent.  
  
"How did you do.... " she demanded weakly. Then there was a flash of light and a vortex opened up and dropped out another bad tan demon. 'Where are all these guys coming from?' I tried to move but found I had less energy than Kathy, who managed to crawl to her feet. ^There you are. Do you have any idea how much trouble you're in young lady?^ The new demon spoke in a funky language, yet creepily enough it seemed to translate in my head. 'Just what I need. More people messing with my mind.'  
  
^I'm not going back!^ Kathy screamed at our new guest. 'And she calls ME rude.'  
  
^Don't take that tone with me.^ he scolded Kathy.  
  
Kathy stomped her foot. ^I'm 3000 years old! When are you going to stop treating me like I'm 900?^  
  
Xander ran into the room followed shortly by Oz. 'What are THEY doing here? I knocked them out!' The demon currently inhabiting the center of my room turned around and roared at the nowhere near dastardly duo. Xander blanched and took a step back. Oz followed suit only without the face. After years of exposure to Oz and his Ozness I wasn't terribly surprised. Ignoring my friends, the demon turned back to Kathy. ^Enough. You're coming home.^ His voice was stern and he gave Kathy no chance to continue their argument. He waved his robed arm and what looked like a black hole to me appeared in the floor. I felt air tugging at my feet. 'I think I'd better move.' Summoning up my strength I crawled around my bed putting it between me and the hole. I turned back in time to see Kathy get sucked in. She screamed the whole time. 'Good riddance.' The other demon calmly stepped in and the hole closed up behind him leaving no sign that it had ever been there. "Now that's the way to travel. No lines. No waiting," Xander quipped. I just stared at him speechless and filled with relief that it was over. Willow Despite everything, Buffy had forgiven us, something I was supremely grateful for. My roommate hadn't reacted so well when she found out I had requested a transfer and was moving out. Buffy was kind enough to give me Kathy's space and the Admin didn't object. Kathy's disappearance was pretty easy to explain to the authorities. Xander suggested we just do what the vamps living in Psi Theta had. He pointed out the cops hadn't looked too closely before and if they thought the vamps were behind it they'd probably just take a few notes then go on their way. Sadly enough he was right. We just cleared out her stuff, wrote a note, called the cops, waited a few days, and gave everything to charity. I'd moved in this afternoon, with the assistance of Buffy and the guys. There was a moment when I ate Buffy's sandwich when I thought she was going to go uber on me but nothing came of it and I got the hint. I guess too many years with Xander the Mooch Master had made me forget some people don't like sharing food. My mom for one has to have everything carefully separated and eaten one thing at a time. Trying to eat something off her plate used to earn me a smack as a child. 'I can live with no touchy my food. At least here I don't have to worry about going deaf at twenty.' I glanced around at my new and much cleaner surroundings. 'Still who would have thought it? A neat freak demon.' I shrugged at the inconsistencies of the universe and cracked open my psychology book. Xander  
  
After the absolutely humiliating way Buffy had knocked me out the day before and everything that had happened in the days before that I felt the need to do something, anything, to get me out of my stinking basement and away from my memories. The walls were closing in on me and I growled at them. I was going to do something before I went completely nuts. I grabbed my trunk, pulling out my 'hunting clothes'. I was going to get all dressed up and spread a little misery around.  
  
The walk to Willy's was uneventful, which just mad my fuse even shorter. I knew I looked like a vamp on the hunt; it was a fact I counted on. I wanted the Sunnydale vamps to feel challenged and the cops' eyes to slide over me. What I didn't realize at the time was that my anger followed me like a crowd and nobody, and I mean nobody, wanted to mess with someone dressed like me in that mood. I swept down the stairs of the Alibi Room in all black, my coat bellowing around me looking like the specter of death looming in for the kill. I was venting. So sue me. Obviously Willy was no stranger to silent visitors. He knew I was there and without turning said, "We're closed."  
  
"Too bad." My voice was cold and hard. Willy turned fear on his face. But the moment he saw exactly who it was that had disturbed him in the middle of the day his face relaxed. That just made me angrier. Clearly he, like everyone else, assumed I was absolutely no threat. The fact that a guy who didn't even know me and was afraid of his own shadow thought I was harmless definitely didn't make me any happier. I lunged for him and before he could take another breath he was hanging a foot off the ground. I took no small amount of joy in seeing the fear return to his eyes. The only reason I hadn't vamped was because I didn't want him to be able to hold that over my head. After all, information was his business. But I really wanted to. Growling deep in my throat, I glared at the miserable excuse for a human wriggling in my hands. "We've got to talk."  
  
Willy  
  
'I need a drink. A BIG drink.' Hands shaking, I reached for a bottle of whiskey I keep under the bar for these occasions. I took a long swig from the bottle to calm my nerves then grabbed a glass. Filling it up to the brim, I stared into the liquid as if it held the answers of the universe.  
  
The elder Harris, a frequent customer here as well as several other establishments in Sunnydale, was a putz and until tonight I had considered the younger one just as much of one. Oh, he had more suicidal tendencies for sure, hanging out with the Slayer, but from my contacts I'd heard he wasn't much in a fight. I snorted. 'Not much in a fight, right. That's why he held me three feet off the floor for ten minutes without even breaking a sweat. I'm never trusting Myke again.' I hadn't considered him a danger when he darkened my door. I pressed the glass against my pounding forehead. I groaned out loud, "I'm such an idiot."  
  
I knew I was damn lucky to still be breathing. I learned early on that dismissing anybody makes the weakest demon ready to fight, it's a male thing, and dismissing the younger Harris almost got my head handed back to me on a platter. 'I don't know what that boy's hiding and I don't think I want to find out.' I shuddered at the images my mind called up. Harris was scary. Scarier than the Slayer for sure. 'At least she has life in her eyes when she beats on me.' It was a good thing he hadn't come just for another round of beat the Willy or I'm pretty sure I'd be sitting here dead. Amazingly enough he had wanted to HIRE me.  
  
Several demons do the same thing but I never imagined a demon killer, let alone one of the Slayers lackey's, ever considering it. It was against their moral high ground. The "good guys" usually beat me, not pay me. Come to think of it, I like this better. 'Fewer bruises and more money, not a bad arrangement.' Some of the conditions were bizarre but not too much if one considered the town they were living in. I was supposed to keep all mention of Harris's activities from all parties or..The boy's glare explained without words that I wouldn't like what would happen and it definitely did provide a vivid fill-in-the-blank for my imagination. He didn't have to worry about me telling the demons, they understand when you get the info beat out of you, but I didn't think they would take kindly to me supplying for both sides. Sighing, I put the bottle away and reached for the coffee. I could hear the first scuttles of the night from below. 'Still whatever puts bread on the table.'  
  
Jennifer Lowery  
  
'I can't believe it. She had the nerve to tell me what to do! She's not even my real mom!'  
  
I slammed the door and crashed face first onto my bed, taking out my frustrations on the bedsprings. I gazed down at the book in my hands struggling for a moment to decide what to do. 'To heck with it. I'm twelve years old. I'm not a baby any more.' Flipping to the page I had read over and over, I started reciting the words at a shout.  
  
"ZXOERTA, OHIS. MOREAT. MOREAT!" I heard banging outside my door but I just ignored it. It was just my stepmother again. I could barely hear her over the din and what I could make out didn't faze me.  
  
"WOAT MI FE OUMTIS. MOREAT! MOREAT!" I wouldn't have to listen to her much longer any way. I grinned as a green glow started pulsating in the corner. Not for very long at all.  
  
Megan Lowery  
  
'That little witch! She's at it again! I knew I should have sent her off to boarding school as soon as her father bit the dust but they cost money. This time she's not going to get off so easy.'  
  
I lost my temper once more as my miserable stepdaughter shouted more gibberish. Gritting my teeth I pounded on the door. "You stop this right now, you wretched thing. I've had enough! You're a freak and I'm getting rid of you. Your father wasn't that loaded!" It suddenly got quiet and I smiled in satisfaction. 'Little twerp at least knows when to shut up.' I sighed. This was more work than I'd expected. Best bet probably was boarding school. A smile curved across my features. 'And it will leave me available to find the next sucker.'  
  
Thinking all was right again and mentally planning for the call to Switzerland tomorrow, I turned away from my stepdaughter's door. Then the screaming began.  
  
Officer Randolph  
  
"Man that stinks." The stench rolled over me as I stepped into the crime scene. At first I was occupied with pulling a handkerchief out of my pocket and covering my nose. Then I focused on the sight before me. I grimaced in disgust and stepped lightly around the corpses, making my way over to Stein. Automatically I noted both looked female, what was left of them anyway. Both bodies were covered in a green slime and looked chewed on. The younger girl was lying on the floor near the bed and the older woman had been pulled in, if the way the rug was scrunched up was any indication. I tilted my head and considered the slightly less mauled woman and then shook it. 'What a shame. She was hot.' I nodded to Stein who was holding his nose. Inwardly I grinned. 'Bastard.' He briefly looked my way then turned back to the scene. 'Man thinks he's so great.' I snorted at the detective's holier-than-thou attitude. He glanced at me again. 'He couldn't find his ass with both hands and a map.' Finally he sighed and turned to me.  
  
"Wild animals this time?" I nodded. If you removed the green slime it was even more believable than usual. He nodded as well. "Who should we call?"  
  
"Ben's on vacation."  
  
"I guess Jack gets this commission then." We made our way out of the bloody mess. I heard him mumble. "Clean up's such a mess."  
  
I nodded again. 'That's for sure.' Behind us a wind blew shut an open book lying on the floor. It was probably the last book an unfortunate and naïve young girl had read. The cover read in bold lettering CONJURING.  
  
tbc.... 


	3. Eternal Love?

Chapter 3: Eternal Love?  
(Yeah, right)  
  
Ed  
  
Life had never been too good to me and unlife hadn't turned out to be much better. Nothing about me was right for being a vampire. I'm average looking, you could pass me in a crowd and never even see me, I'm not aggressive, and my name is Ed. The last one was probably the most pathetic. Seriously, who ever imagined a fearsome vampire named Ed? The name Ed just doesn't inspire terror or even a sense of mystery. The guy who owns the bowling alley, that's the guy named Ed.  
  
Lots of days I cursed my sire for making me. The idiot isn't even around any more to offer me protection from the others. The Slayer dusted him not long after I was made. I never really met the bastard. The whole five minutes it took for him to turn me weren't big on chitchat but for the ribbing I got for being of his get he was a real idiot. He probably thought when he made me that I'd be his minion. Maybe I would have been. The sire- childe bond is pretty strong. That would be the only thing worse than the way I live now. Willing lackey to an idiot, what an existence.  
  
Still all I knew was that without a sire for even the appearance of protection I had to seek another kind of defense. There were just too many vampires in Sunnydale to be a lone wolf.  
  
I grasped the precariousness of my situation the day after my rising. Vampires are pack animals, the weak are culled and the solo hunters can easily starve to death. I was a childe of a known imbecile, shaky ground to begin with. Then to top it off he'd gotten himself slayed. No one would care if anything happened to me. I was stuck. The high of power crashed around my ears as just how little I really had became apparent to me. Sure I was stronger, faster, and all round physically improved but that didn't mean much. I'd been a sheep, well now I was a sacrificial goat. If I joined with a master vampire and his minions I'd be cannon fodder for sure. Bye- bye Ed.  
  
It humbled me to realize that the thing that set me apart was the one thing becoming a vampire hadn't changed, my wits. I'd been an anthropology student before my turning and I could read the hierarchy around me because of it. My knowledge let me see the trap before it sprung on me and led me to a safer alternative. Not a great one but one more likely to let me live a while longer.at least I'd thought so.  
  
The small independent band I'd joined wasn't big enough to draw attention and I had figured that Justin, the alpha male, was just smart enough to see that rocking the boat in Sunnydale would lead to a quick end. I'd been wrong.  
  
Exactly one week after my turning I stood in one of Sunnydale's numerous graveyards and knew that I was dust. Justin held a squirming little girl in his arms and he was grinning like an idiot. I wanted to ask God what I had done to deserve this fate but I was pretty sure that being a demon would be somewhere in his answer. I looked into the toddler's face and felt my un- beating heart drop into my stomach. Tears were streaming down her face but she wasn't screaming her head off. In a way I admired her composure. I was falling apart. 'This is utter lunacy!' Nothing would get to the Slayer more than killing kids, and I desperately didn't want to draw the attention of the Slayer.  
  
"Fresh meat tonight boys, " Justin crowed. I looked to the two other vampires that were part of the group, hoping they'd see the insanity of this but all I saw was anticipation on their faces. 'Damn. I'm dust.'  
  
Andy vamped out with Carl close behind him. The little girl let out a single scream and bit down on Justin's hand.  
  
Xander  
  
It felt weird patrolling alone after so much time hunting with Methos and Richie. I kept expecting to hear their breathing behind me or the slight crackle that Richie still gave off when he walked. Skulking in the woods of Sunnydale was also different than staying unseen in the blocks of the city and I was feeling out of my element. Soldier boy had more memories of the jungle than of America and his skills were rusty anyway. I was wishing that Adam had thought of that before he threw me out of the nest, but he was five thousand, not all knowing.  
  
Stopping at the Henderson mausoleum, I did a quick scan of the area. The spell I'd had placed on my hood made things a little darker but with my vampy-vision I could still see just fine. Before I had left L.A. I had asked Angel if he knew of any powerful witches willing to perform a spell for me. He'd been surprised but had recommended a trio, rather reluctantly. Can't say as I blame him. The Furies were something. 'I am not going to ask him why every time I said his name they went, "Mmm, Angel." I have enough nightmares.'  
  
The bit of bought magic I had placed on a couple of hoods was one of Darkness. If anyone, or anything, looked into the hood all they would ever see is darkness. Complete darkness. I had a secret identity and unlike some people, *ahem* Superman, I wasn't stupid enough to think a change of clothes would keep me in the secret business. 'And they say you don't learn anything from comic books.' I also had a minor spell put on so it wouldn't fall back in a fight. What good would that neat (and expensive) darkness trick be if the hood fell off revealing yours truly?  
  
I had about twenty minutes before I had to be at Giles' so I was just doing a last sweep. Then I heard a scream. Small yet loud at the same time. 'Kid.' Without a second thought I spun and headed in the direction of the little screamer.  
  
Ed  
  
Justin dropped the kid when she bit him with a yelp. Smart girl that she was, she hit the ground running. She dove into a hedge of bushes that surrounded the graveyard and I could hear her stampeding away. The guys moved to chase after her. I was seriously contemplating running in the other direction and not stopping till I hit the state line. The guys got as far as the hedge.  
  
A man dressed completely in black with a hood hiding his face jumped over the bushes. He seemed to hang in mid-air, his black coat flapping around him. Whimsically, I was reminded of those Batman cartoons I watched as a kid. I felt a chill run down my spine. I had a feeling things had just gone from bad to worse.  
  
I was right. It went so fast I felt like if I'd blinked I would have missed it. Gravity reasserted itself and the guy landed on Justin with a heavy thud and rolled away from him. As he sprang to his feet he drew a sword from somewhere in the folds of his coat. It was the color of fresh blood and reflected a beam from a nearby streetlight.  
  
I then did the only smart thing I could think of. I ran. About twenty feet away, I turned around. I don't know why. Maybe because the fight was like a car crash and I couldn't look away. Whatever the reason I saw the figure kick Justin in the stomach then spin and behead Carl. Justin scrambled to his feet and lunged only to get a slash across his stomach. He was too busy tying to keep his guts in to duck the swing that took his head from his shoulders. Of Andy there was no sign. The entire fight couldn't have lasted more than thirty seconds.  
  
Then the scariest thing of all happened. The hood shot up, focusing in my direction. My stomach clenched when I looked into that hood and saw there was nothing holding the cloth up. It was empty but some how it saw me. I backed up as the thing started for me. It stopped, though, when the sound of a couple girls reached my ears. It spun around and ran for a tree. Placing one foot mid-trunk, the thing ran up it. It had just gotten out of sight when a couple of girls walked beneath the tree it was hiding in. And I gulped when I recognized the blonde. The Slayer.  
  
Swallowing my terror I turned and crashed through the brush. I had escaped. I had escaped.  
  
Xander  
  
'I feel like a monkey.' I was gripping onto a couple branches and sitting spread eagled up a--I glanced at a leaf--oak tree waiting for a strolling Buffy and Willow to wrap it up and move along. I shook my head at their girl talk, their rather loud girl talk. Buffy's "innocent girls/free meal" routine wouldn't work nearly as well for me. Oh, I could play the dumb fool out for a walk but for some strange reason vamps tended to like young nubile girls better. Go figure.  
  
One of the vamps had gotten away. Still, the little girl was all right, she'd high-tailed it out of there, and was probably in her mommy's arms right now. Yep. The wind carried the sound of a woman scolding and a little girl's voice to my ears, followed by the sound of a door slamming. She was all right.  
  
My focus was thrown from the little girl when I heard Willow say something about Parker. I strained my ears to catch what they were saying. Too late, they were too far off and all I caught was "Bronze". I shook my head and released the branch. There was something about that boy that I just didn't like. He reminded me too much of the jocks at high school I guess.  
  
My coat snagged on the bark a couple times as I slid down the tree's trunk. I looked at my watch. With a groan I slapped my forehead. I was going to be late.  
  
Ed  
  
I'd never been as happy to see anything as the sign for Willie's. I stumbled once when I let myself relax with relief. I caught myself before I hit the ground again but it was a close thing.  
  
Willie  
  
The loud crash was what made me look up. It wasn't uncommon for a demon or vampire to crash into my place drunk and wanting more to drink so I wasn't terribly worried, just mildly curious. The winded and dirty vampire who stumbled in, though, looked more than half wild and hysterical. Not the usual look for a vampire unless the Slayer is chasing. Hastily I looked behind him to see if she'd followed him in. So close after the Harris kid visited would be bad for my bones, and she didn't have any respect for the furniture.  
  
But no, the vampire was alone and I was a little concerned over his continued nervousness. He glanced back at the exit several times even as he sat. Doing my job, I approached the jittery vampire who ran a dirty hand over his equally dirt face.  
  
"Give me a shot of tequila and leave the bottle." His voice came out in a harsh whisper and suddenly I had a jolt of recognition. This vampire had been here last week with Justin. He was a newbie, Fred or something.  
  
I set the glass in front of him and filled it up, setting the bottle next to the glass. Then, true to the role of bartenders every where I asked, "What happened to you buddy?" The vampire looked up at me in shock then started laughing. It was soft laughter touched with hysteria but it drew the attention of "people" in the bar.  
  
"The Slayer just saved my life." After he blurted that shocking statement out he collapsed face first on my bar overcome with laughter.  
  
Growls flitted throughout my bar and I nervously wondered if there was going to be another fight tonight. The only reason I could think of for the Slayer to save a vampire would be if he were working for her. I had a feeling that the demons had come to the same conclusion.  
  
The demon nearest to the hysterical vampire, a Peeth demon who came here regularly to get piss drunk, and was solidly in that state at the moment, got up and yanked the vampire off his feet. The vampire hung from the Peeth's fist looking for all the world as if he'd stared death in the eye and no longer feared anything.  
  
"What do you mean by that trash?"  
  
I didn't dare wave my hand in front of my face to dispel the rank smell of the Peeth's breath that I smelt even across the bar. Peeths' grew to impressive standards even as demons considered such things and this Peeth was no exception.  
  
"It fell on us. This black thing. It ripped into us like we were humans." The vampire related the fight to us blow by blow, like recalling a wrestling match.  
  
The bar was silent with shock as the Peeth lowered the vampire back down onto his stool. The vampire grabbed his shot with a shaking hand and downed it with one gulp. It slammed down on the bar breaking the silence.  
  
"In L.A.," a soft voice started from the corner of the bar. I swung around to focus on the speaker. It was a vampire that had recently migrated to Sunnydale that I'd been keeping tabs on because he had been compiling minions. "He cleared out 250 of us in two months." A growl of disbelief rose up from my patrons. He shook his head and kept his gaze focused on his drink. "He was everywhere. All over the city. Always with that sword." He spat the word sword with disgust. "The one that looked like it was covered in blood. He became the boogey man for us. We called him Death. Because that's what he brought, not to just demons and vampires but to humans as well. We found a building full of bodies, carved to pieces by something long and sharp." I swallowed my fear. This sounded like a major bad.  
  
I continued listening as the vampire from L.A. went on about the force that had ripped through his city, the whole time making internal notes. 'Some one should be willing to pay for this information.'  
  
Willow  
  
'Parker seems nice, and normal. Normal is definitely good. Not that not being normal is a bad thing. I mean I'm a witch dating a werewolf and Buffy's a Slayer so normal isn't our strong suit but Buffy needs normal. Angel most definitely wasn't normal as a man or as vampire--'I stopped myself. I knew from experience that I could go on for hours. Turning my attention back to the real world, I watched as Buffy and Parker left the Bronze together and silently wished them luck. Buffy had been eyeing the boy for a week now but her past experiences were making her gun shy. I had the feeling that she'd need all the luck she could get.  
  
"Hello beautiful." I smiled and twisted around to face Oz. I happily let myself be wrapped in his waiting arms. I couldn't help the blush that spread across my face at his words. 'I'm nowhere near as pretty as he says. But I like it when he says it.' "We're loading up. Meet me outside, okay?" He pulled away and gave me one of his slow smiles. I nodded, still smiling. He headed off to find Devon and I made my way through the throng of Bronzers.  
  
Outside I hung around the entrance and waited for Oz to finish and come get me. 'It's chilly out here.' I grabbed my arms, trying to warm up.  
  
"Willow?"  
  
I turned, surprised at the familiar voice. I turned to see a familiar and not too welcome face. "Harmony? I haven't seen you since we graduated. How are you?"  
  
"Oh, I'm good." Harmony hadn't changed that I could see. Her clothes looked brand new and expensive. Her face was overly done up with makeup as always and her eyes still betrayed her scorn as she looked at me--like I was beneath her and she was doing me a great service by talking to me. A few months earlier I would have let it get to me but lately I've learned to stand up to what I once shrank away from. Popularity has nothing to do with the real world. I'd seen one of the old Cordettes the other day working at McDonald's, which just strengthened that knowledge.  
  
Knowledge doesn't keep all my nervousness at bay, after all I was subjected to years of programming to shrivel up when the popular even looked my way. I tried to wrap up the awkward conversation. "That's great." I turned back, looking for Oz, then suddenly I felt a sharp pain from my neck and strong hands holding me. I struggled. 'No! A vampire!' But soon I began feeling lightheaded and my struggles became too weak to do anything. Then suddenly the pain in my neck increased and the pressure was gone. I staggered back and saw Harmony with my blood on her lips.  
  
"Oh, Harmony." I felt guilt wash over me and sorrow. I hadn't liked her much but even she didn't deserve this. Oz wrapped his arm around me protectively and I realized who my rescuer was.  
  
Harmony hissed at us, her face distorted with her demonic visage and her mouth covered with my blood. Weakly I leaned back against Oz. Harmony tried to get around the cross Oz was holding in front of the both of us to ward her off but she couldn't get past. "This is so unfair!" She flipped her hair over her shoulder as I'd seen her do a million times before when she was miffed. I was haunted, as always, by seeing the familiar mannerisms of someone I used to know now belonging to a monster. Harmony continued, "Okay, fine. Hide behind your boyfriend. But I have a boyfriend too. And he's gonna be mad that you were mean to me." Then she turned and fled.  
  
"Come on." Oz pulled me to his van. He nodded to Devon then opened the door and hustled me inside. I was still too shocked to react. My mind was blank til the second that Oz slammed his door shut. Then I snapped awake.  
  
"Where are we going?"  
  
"Buffy needs to know about this." Though his voice was as calm as usual I noticed a slight tremor in his hands as he started the engine. 'He was scared for you.' I reached over and placed my hand over his.  
  
"Thank you," I said softly. I was rewarded by one of his slow smiles. Instantly I felt a warmth spread through out my body that I hadn't felt since I'd exited the Bronze.  
  
"I love you." His voice was rough with an unusual show of emotion and I felt a shiver run down my back. He said it with such finality, as if that was all there was in the world that mattered. 'That's because to him it is.' Suddenly I felt warmer still, like there was a miniature sun inside me right where my heart was. Oz turned his eyes to the road and we were off but not before I noticed the unshed tears glistening in them.  
  
Buffy  
  
'Damn! Just when we were going to kiss too.' Parker and I had been walking home, discussing old emotional scars, basically working up to a kiss then Willow and Oz rushed up and reminded me of my job. At least I'd managed to confirm the party date before I had to rush up the stairs. Willow related everything that had happened at the Bronze, pausing every once in a while to gush over her hero boyfriend.  
  
I shook my head. "Harmony? A vamp? Drat. I'm going to have to revise my estimation of just how low they'll sink to find members." A thought occurred to me. "You know, she must be dying without a reflection." Pacing back and forth I threw a glance at Willow. She was looking far too pale.  
  
'What do you expect? She was just vamp food! Damn angry puppy.'  
  
Oz was putting a neon green band-aid on her newest injury and looking uncharacteristically grim. "So who do you think this boyfriend is?" Willow opened her mouth but I raised my hand to stop her. "Forget it. Stupid question. Knowing Harmony it's an ex-football player with an I.Q. in the single digits and muscles the size of the balls he used to toss around."  
  
Oz looked up from Willow. "Devon dated her for a while, but she was too flaky for him. Which, stop and marvel at the concept."  
  
I rubbed my forehead. "Well there's nothing we can do except wait. Oz, you'd better head home. Willow, I think we'd both feel better after a good night's sleep." Oz nodded and kissed Willow on the cheek. I turned away to let them have some privacy for their goodbyes. I heard some whispering but tried to tune it out. I nodded to Oz as he left I threw myself onto my bed.  
  
"Sorry we interrupted your moment with Parker," Willow tentatively offered her apology.  
  
Not looking at her I blew air at the ceiling in response. I didn't really want to talk about it. Good things in my life turn bad when thought of too much. I hope things go better at the party tomorrow.  
  
Bryan  
  
I don't know when precisely I gave up. When I gave up my hope in escape and my disbelief of what was really happening to me. The exact second escapes me. Just as basically every moment afterward has become a blur to me. Occasionally I would be pulled back to reality, someplace I desperately tried to avoid since the only thing in it for me was pain and confusion. In my more lucid moments I figured the fuzzy quality to my thoughts was a byproduct from my situation of permanent blood loss and that only when I regained enough blood did I become semi aware. This time I was jerked back to the pain that was currently my whole world by a hand ripping my hair out of my head. I felt part of my scalp go with my hair but I only let out a low moan. It was just a new sharp pain amidst all my others. Still it was enough to jerk me back. Closing my eyes, I felt silent tears stream down my cheeks.  
  
I felt a moment of bitter irony as I heard Harmony call me Bernie. 'Even now she can't get my name right.' Seeing Harmony, the ditziest peroxide blond to ever saunter the halls of Sunnydale High, as a vampire was perhaps the most mind warping part of this. She didn't act any differently now that she was evil incarnate. But then it had been rumored for years that she was exactly that. Harmony was blathering on about how she wanted to go to a party and kill some fresh food. I heard her making advances, trying to get her way through sex. 'She really hasn't changed.'  
  
Things started getting foggy again and I welcomed oblivion with open arms. I was a coward but I couldn't be in this hellhole.  
  
Xander  
  
Anya had just left a very confused immortal boy behind her. I watched her retreating back, stunned into immobility. Then I shook it off. I re-entered Giles' place still slightly dazed. The G-Man gave me a questioning look but I pretended that I didn't see it. I had no clue what to tell him about my visitor and her blunt confessions. I sat back down amidst the multitudes of books I was sorting for a piddling amount but I couldn't focus at the task at hand. I kept going back to what Anya had just told me out on the porch.  
  
'Her dreams! God I can't believe it. She's actually fantasying about me! That's certainly a new one for me.' Still we're not together because of a few dreams. If it worked that way than Buffy and I would have been a couple for most of high school. I remember Anya wanted me to go with her when she decided to get away before the Mayor went demon at graduation and we did go to the prom together.but I didn't know she.. So what am I going to do? She's an ex-demon-- Oh who am I to judge anyone. One of my best friends probably has her death rate beat. He did have a few more millennia to work on it after all. Before I could stop it, that thought lead to Angel. 'And you have the right to judge him?' I growled at myself and shut out that particular quandary. 'Not now. One thing at a time.'  
  
Okay, let's think about this logically. There's the age difference for one thing. She's really robbing the cradle, but won't I be doing the same thing in a couple of decades? That brings up another one. She's mortal now. She is going to die eventually. What it boiled down to was do I really want to get involved with her? Sure, she's pretty and kind of funny in a not-on- purpose kind of way. There's some chemistry. I sighed mentally. 'Why am I'm always drawn to the demons?' I shook it off and focused on the problem. Do I want her in my life? I have so many secrets and problems. Should I lay them out for someone I'm not even sure I trust? I don't know. 'Damn.' I rubbed my forehead. 'Boy can I pick 'em. Well, in my defense this time she did pick me.' I snorted. 'If she hadn't I probably would have gone looking for her.' Shaking off thoughts of my disastrous love life, I got back to work.  
  
I can't believe I'm actually following through with this half-baked plan. I needed the cover but this was bordering on ridiculous. Filing things for Giles is not an overly interesting job. Though from time to time I'd recognize a book that Mallory had read and his recollections would flood my mind, such as the content of the book and how he'd come by it. Not always pleasant depending on how stubbornly the previous owner had tried to keep them in their possession and the actual subject of the book. This job was teaching me the necessary skill of controlling those memories, adding on to what I had already learned to cope with-- the soldier boy's memories. Mallory's were a lot more intense because of the combination of insanity and years he had to build on to his personality. The extracurricular learning and the fact that this, along with several other jobs, were earning me enough money so that I could pretend to "buy" a car at a fictional steal made the hours of dust inhalation bearable.  
  
I had the car sent down from one of Mallory's estates. The driver dropped it off yesterday. No questions asked. Mallory didn't hire his people for their inquisitive natures. Besides they're used to odd requests. They don't seem to care that they suddenly had a new employer as long as they got paid. I had already fired the more questionable people that were on the payroll. Assassins, torturers, and kidnappers aren't something I have much use for. Mallory kept them around because he didn't much like to play by the Rules of the Game. The only one he'd had any respect for was not fighting on Holy Ground. I think he would have broken that one if he hadn't feared another Pompeii. Accessing Mallory's assets was made easier by the fact that he was a cunning megalomaniac, and a rather paranoid one-- he had the strangest nightmares about the IRS; he'd filed everything under an assumed name. No one had ever seen "Jonathan Newman" because everything was bought and paid for through middlemen. The only people who met "Jonathan Newman" were the ones who worked directly for him and now me. They had no trouble transferring bosses due to not caring one wit what happened to their former one. I just continue running the other things through that fiction of a man Jonathan Newman.  
  
I had the driver leave the car with a mechanic that I learned through Mallory's old information channels could refit a car for practically anything. As much as I hate to admit it, the lunatic's memories make my life a lot easier. When they're done-- at the latest next week--I'll be driving around a small, reinforced sports car that is practically brand new but doesn't look it. I got tired of walking and hitching rides. My borrowed... all right, stolen bike got smashed, along with basically all my bones, when I figured out that you really CAN'T go through a cement wall like they do in the movies. 'Of course I wouldn't have tried if that Hlylarsk demon hadn't been standing in front of it.' The bus was just too degrading for even the old me but I was still confined to my friend's perceptions and had to come up with something that fit into their view of me. A sudden sneeze ripped through me making dust fly. 'This still sucks.'  
  
Spike  
  
'I don't know what I was thinking when I turned that twit. Has fewer brains than Dru on her not so lucid days.' Growling, I dragged Harmony's whining ass all the way back to the hideout. Once we reached our room I released her and started pacing the room. 'How did I let her talk me into that stupid party anyway!'  
  
"Spike! Why didn't you stay and hurt them?! Those mortals were meeean to me!" She stamped her foot and dirt rose into the air. Crossing her arms over her ample chest she started complaining. Again. "I'm sooo tired of this! We're down here digging in the dirt hiding from that little bitch and her weirdo friends! Why can't we go to the mall? You could steal me some nice things." Her tone had changed from whiny to what she thought was coy, trying to manipulate me as she used to high school boys with their raging hormones. I was sorely tempted to smack her.  
  
Instead I grabbed her and pushed her against the wall. Right up in her face I roared. "Why? Why! Because--you silly twit--the Gem of Amara would make me invincible! It's close enough to taste and you just told the good guys the bloody plan!" She just smiled and kissed me roughly. I felt her face morphing against mine and my demon responding. I resisted for a moment then gave in to its arousal. Now I remembered why I'd turned her. Girl knew more tricks in bed than any mortal I'd ever known.  
  
Anya  
  
I stood outside the door to Xander Harris' room and told myself. "This has to work. It will work." Thoughts of him have been driving me insane. He's always in my head. Whispering, touching me. I need to get rid of him. He's a male; they always betray you sooner or later. This plan has to work. This body just wants him. If I give it what it wants I'll forget him. Grabbing the knob, I take a deep breath and step into his room. 'It's cleaner than I imagined.' There was clutter but the floor was visible and there was no half consumed food or beer bottles lying about, as there were upstairs. In actuality the first floor had been rather rank. Mrs. Harris, who'd let me in, seemed to not mind. She just walked over the garbage so she definitely wasn't cleaning the room for him. Xander was sitting on the couch half bent over something when I came in. He hurriedly shoved whatever it was under the couch then rose, surprise coloring his face.  
  
"Anya? What are you doing here?"  
  
"Your mother told me you were down here. She said to ask you to add fabric softener when the timer goes off. Can we talk some more?" I was practically pleading and I knew it. 'See what he's reduced me to?'  
  
I saw something flash across his face but I couldn't identify it. He opened his mouth to say something then shook his head before finally saying, "Would you like something to drink?" I had the distinct feeling that wasn't what he had been about to say. "I have cran-apple." I nodded and when he turned his back to me I quickly pushed down my dress, ignoring his further questions. I had expressly worn this dress for it's easy to get out of design.  
  
The form I currently inhabited wasn't ugly, I knew that. I'd made sure it wasn't. Cordelia would never have paid any attention to an ugly face. But when I had created my human façade in preparation for earning Cordelia's trust I didn't design it to turn a man on. At the time my hate for men had been so complete the mere idea would have made me kill whoever proposed it to me. Still I was pleased now at the shock and arousal my body obviously had on him. As I stood in the center of his room naked I pressed my advantage, outlining my plan. I watched his eyes get wider and wider as I went on.  
  
"You.Anya I.. 'He's stuttering. If I don't make a move I could be standing here all night.' While he might enjoy it, it's cold down here. Walking to him, I made sure to walk as sinuously as I could, flaunting everything I had. 'This is taking longer than I expected. I thought he'd just jump me.' I grabbed his hand and pulled him to the bed. He seemed to shake himself out of his trance when I pushed him down onto the mattress and began unbuttoning his shirt. I never saw his hand move but all at once he had roughly stopped mine with his. Shocked, I jerked up from his chest and locked my gaze on his eyes. His eyes. They were no longer glazed over. They were full of concern.  
  
Softly he asked me, "Are you sure this is what you want?" The intensity of his stare was almost scaring me. Then I realized. 'He's actually asking me?' I knew he wanted me, there was no question of THAT but he wanted to make sure that this was what I wanted. I felt my need intensify. I couldn't even talk as emotions bombarded me. I nodded dumbly. He pulled me close, wrapping his arms around me. Oh so gently. Then he kissed me thoroughly and completely. In that moment I knew my plan had failed just as completely. I could never forget Xander. I ignored the buzzer. Xander was a lot more important than laundry.  
  
Buffy  
  
'Pay phones are a bitch.' "Yeah, Spike with Harmony. If you can believe it. I couldn't figure out why he ran away but Harmony said something. Why they were here. They were looking for the gem of something... Amara."  
  
"The gem of Amara. Are you sure?" I could practically see him reaching for his books. I rolled my eyes even though I knew he couldn't see me.  
  
"Yeah, what's up?" Please don't let it be another apocalypse. I was really looking forward to getting back to Parker.  
  
"Uh, oh, it's just, uh, it's not real." I heard shuffling around on the other end. 'Yep he's going for the books.' I smiled at Giles' predictability. "It's uh, the vampire equivalent of the Holy Grail. The source of some enormous power, was conveniently vague. Oh, here it is, yes. There was a great deal of vampiric interest in locating it during the, uh, oh the 10th century. Questing vampires combed the earth, but no one ever found anything. It was concluded that it never existed."  
  
"Well, Spike seems to think it exists. And he's looking in Sunnydale." I frowned. Just because it didn't exist didn't negate the fact that Spike was back in town. Did I just think negate? Okay no more hanging around Giles, he's corrupting me.  
  
"Yes, well, I'll research it as best I can. You've done all you can for tonight. Why don't you go to bed?" 'Yes! He's not going to make me patrol.'  
  
"Uh, huh. Sleepy. Yawn. Bye." Now I have to find Parker and explain my mondo weird behavior. Oh joy.  
  
Parker  
  
'Fate lands another one into my hands. That line's almost as good as the sob story about my dear old still kicking father. Sympathy and a good dose of faked willingness to wait does it every time.' As I kissed Buffy half my mind considered how I should approach my next conquest. Name's Wanda from Minnesota. She's still in a state of culture shock. Buffy practically ripped the shirt off me. 'She likes it rough. Well those ones are fun.' I didn't believe for a second what she said about the British guy with the Billy Idol riff. There was some definite sexual tension there but the truth was I just didn't care. She tumbled backward onto my bed, already half naked. I smiled down at her and she smiled back. 'God, she's gullible. I'll have to give her the cold shoulder tomorrow though. She'll become too attached.' She pulled me down for a rough kiss. 'It will be fun while it lasts.'  
  
Giles  
  
I glanced at the unslept in bed once more and sternly told myself. 'You're not her father. You. Are. Not. Her. Father You bloody pillcock.' But I knew she could be walking into heartbreak and wanted to save her from that pain. 'I've seen all the tricks. Heck I used most of them.' I couldn't help it. I knew from Willow that she'd only been seeing this fellow for a few days and already she was..'You don't know that, Rupert, she could be elsewhere..'  
  
"Why do they always hide it in Sunnydale? Giles. Giles!"  
  
I heard her practically shout my name and shook myself sternly telling myself. 'Not her father.' "Yes, what did you say, Willow? I'm afraid I was lost in thought." I caught the eye roll she sent to the ceiling.  
  
"Why do they always hide it in Sunnydale?"  
  
I frowned. "Hide what?"  
  
She gave a broad wave. "The whatever. The Glove. The Cross. The Master. Okay, well, he wasn't exactly hidden and the Hellmouth had him trapped so I suppose he had to be here. No Hellmouth anywhere else but--She stopped-- obviously realizing she'd been babbling--then started up again on her original venue. "Why here? You'd think everyone would come here looking for whatever cause they'd know it's always here. Besides all the demons and vamps come here anyway. Why hide it here of all places where it's more likely to be found." She took a deep breath at the end of her tirade. I sat in shock. Then I blinked several times in an effort to stall so I could sort through everything she'd said.  
  
"I've never thought about it before.. Maybe it's unadorned stupidity?"  
  
She gave me a look that said it couldn't be that easy and I shrugged. I was betting on stupidity. Always the best bet in this world.  
  
I heard the door opening. I had to force myself to turn slowly and not yell bloody murder. I started my silent mantra all over again. 'You're not her father. You're not her father.' I managed to keep my voice calm and my face casual as I told her what I'd learned about the Gem. It was a real effort since I could plainly read the emotions on her face. Hurt. Confusion. Bewilderment. Covered by hope. 'That bugger! Whoever he is I'll-- Stop. Not her father. Not her father. Want to go Ripper. Not her father.' I managed to leave before I lost all control and started interrogating her.  
  
Anya  
  
Xander was still sleeping when I decided to investigate his room. There didn't seem to be much in the way of personal possessions. It reminded me slightly of my apartment. Xander had lots of magazines. Some were really strange. The gun and military ones made sense; Xander was a man and they like guns and big macho thingies. I just never imagined he'd have a subscription to New Science or the Smithsonian. Mixed amongst it all were comics. I smiled at those. 'Xander never grew up.' Xander had a few books. A beat up copy of A Tale of Two Cities caught my attention. It looked often read and well loved. I ran my hands over it and smiled. I could imagine Xander with this book in his strong hands, gently flipping pages.  
  
I turned to his sleeping body and faced what I'd been avoiding. I wasn't over him. I was very much not over him. Every moment I spent with him or his things it got worse. The only question was what did I want to do about it? I saw this often enough in my work to recognize the symptoms. It was love or at least the beginning of it. 'And I swore I'd never fall in love like those fools who'd simper at my feet.' I sighed and leaned back into the beat up couch. I hugged the book to my chest.  
  
'He looks so sweet wrapped up in his white cotton sheets, drool collecting at the corner of his mouth.. Boy, do I sound sappy. Xander's great in bed too.' Digging through his stuff had revealed no unsavory habits I could combat my feelings with. Xander seemed perfect. Perfectly lovable.  
  
Thoughts were racing through my mind, colliding and confusing me. I knew I should be scared of this love, I'd been avoiding it my whole life but I wasn't. I was delighted and tingly. Trying to clear my mind I started hitting my heels against the bottom of the couch as I vaguely remember doing at the chairs in our kitchen as a little child when I was trying to make decisions. I was startled when one 'thunk' didn't sound like the others. 'What the--'  
  
The memory of Xander shoving something under there when I first came in surfaced and curiosity took hold. Shifting the book into my left hand, I reached under the couch in the general area where I had been kicking. I grasped something smooth and cool. Pulling, I was surprised when a sword hilt emerged. I felt my eyebrows scrunching against my hairline. I moved to the floor and pulled it the rest of the way into the open. Looking at the red blade I couldn't help but gasp. It was an impressive sword, obviously not for show either. The edge was razor sharp. I glanced down and my guess was confirmed. A cleaning rag had been pulled out along with the sword. 'What is Xander doing with a sword?'  
  
A cold feeling settled in my gut. It was irrational. There could be a thousand reasons. Xander might be using it to kill vampires. I tried to rationalize. The feeling remained. I never checked. I just granted her wish. It hadn't mattered. It wasn't a direct curse. He could be. 'And if he is?' The feeling lifted. Xander hadn't changed. He was the person I was falling for. Now though I had to worry less about him losing his life to this silly fight against the demons. 'I've done a lot worse things than behead someone. For them it's survival even. Not that I care. As long as Xander doesn't lose. If he does.oooh I don't have to play by the rules.'  
  
"Are you going to stare at it forever?" I started and whirled around. Xander was sitting up on the bed. I felt like I'd been caught doing something really naughty, which made no sense because I never felt bad doing something naughty before. Gently I laid the sword down on the sofa.  
  
"No. I was just wondering what it means." His eyes narrowed and he shifted on the bed. "Are you--"I stopped and gathered myself. "Are you Immortal?" He took a sharp intake of breath. Shock was written all over his face but he didn't say anything. Didn't really have to. "I take that as a yes."  
  
Xander  
  
Methos told me there are two low risk options when a mortal finds out what you are. You either kill them or get the hell out of Dodge. I'd already decided I didn't want to leave. My friends only had one shot at life and with the lives we lead theirs seemed destined to be short. I didn't want to miss a minute of them. Leaving Sunnydale while they were alive wasn't an option. That meant silencing the leak. The thing was, I knew I couldn't kill her. Anya was strange, unpredictable, and she'd already dug a place in my heart. It wasn't a deep niche, nothing comparing to those of Willow and Buffy or even that of Cordelia and the Weasel, but in time it might reach the same depth. So that left high-risk option number three. Come clean and stick it out.  
  
"Yes." 'Boy, confront me with the littlest bit of evidence and I cave.' "How did you know?" Curiosity got the better of me.  
  
She pointed to my sword. "I've run into two or four of your kind in my job. Also a few of my kind like to brag about the curses they'd gotten to stick to yours." She glared at me. "You're rather slippery in that regard."  
  
I smiled. "That's us. Slippery when wet. I guess it isn't much fun to make a penis become covered with boils if they heal in two minutes." Anya nodded, apparently not getting the joke.  
  
She gave me an odd look. "How old are you?"  
  
I returned her look though I wasn't sure what the look was. "Twenty."  
  
She frowned. "What?!"  
  
"I was hoping you'd be as old as me."  
  
I laughed. I laughed so hard I fell off the bed.  
  
Tears streaming down my face, I managed to get out between laughs, "I always--" chuckle, "--thought--" chuckle, "--they wanted them--" chuckle, "- -younger--" chuckle, "--not--" chuckle, "--older." Anya's smile was on the nasty side but I understood that. In her former line of work she probably saw that stereotype a lot. Then Anya took me by surprise, again, killing my laughter in my throat. She rushed to my side, quicker that I'd have thought possible, and was touching the side of my face, a worried look occupying hers.  
  
"Are you hurt?" I felt two fingertips caress my face. Then the pressure was gone and she was staring at her fingertips in fascination. Seeing her fingers were red I cursed. Anya jerked back from me in shock. Choosing to ignore her reaction and the churning in my stomach I reached a tissue box I leave on the nightstand. 'Why do I have to bleed tears? It's so god damn melodramatic for heaven's sake.'  
  
"No. I'm not hurt." I looked away as I wiped the blood roughly off with a Kleenex. 'Damn me. I can't keep anything a secret!' I couldn't help the wave of fear that spread through me. I'd just started to let her in. What if she rejected me in disgust? Anya pressed her hand upon my cheek turning my face back towards her.  
  
"What is it?" Anya just kept on throwing me. Her voice was so soft. Only my mother had ever spoken to me with such concern before. I took a deep breath then let it out. 'Can't stop halfway.' I ignored the voice that shouted 'Yes you can!' "I'm a vampire." I heard her heart stop for a second but outwardly Anya didn't react. "It was my first death. Now I'm a mishmash of the two. A little of this, a little of that, presto chango you have the one and only immortal vamp, complete with soul. Free of charge of course."  
  
Anya tilted her head. "You're not going to lose your soul because we had sex." I couldn't tell if that was a question or not. I opened my mouth to say yes but she interrupted me. "Good because I plan on having sex with you a lot." I heard my jaw when it snapped shut.  
  
"What?! I thought that you just wanted to forget about me." I was prepared for a fling and friendship afterwards--okay, maybe I didn't prepare too much. To be brutally honest.I'd pretty much decided earlier to turn her down flat. 'Then you pulled her into bed with you. Shows how well you stick to your plans Mr. Hormone.' I tried to stuff that sarcastic all too right part of myself into the corner of my mind. A dusty corner. It didn't seem to stick because for a second I could swear I heard chuckling resonate inside my skull.  
  
"I changed my mind." I waited for her to continue. She didn't.  
  
Frustrated I bit out. "Aren't you going to tell me WHY?"  
  
Anya seemed to consider that a moment then shrugged. "The sex was good."  
  
I felt my cheeks growing hot. 'I'm blushing! I don't blush!' My body disregarded my denial but the laugh was back. Suddenly I noticed that Anya didn't have a stitch on. For that matter neither did I since I'd fallen off the bed and out of the sheet. I glanced at her chest then hurriedly cast my eyes back up to her face. My blush grew worse. Despite all the memories of sex I had, I wasn't all that experienced. While we were.together. I hadn't thought about it but now.Anya looked down at herself then back up at me. She grinned at me then got up from her position on the floor, causing a distracting array of flesh to ripple before my eyes. I followed her movement, dazed, as she began looking for her dress. She found it crumpled next to the door. Anya slid into it then turned to me. "I'll be back." She was gone before I could form a sentence. I sat alone in my musty basement considering her parting words. 'What would you have said anyway?' The laughter echoed once more. "Oh shut up." I told myself.  
  
Spike  
  
I scratched covertly at my back, hoping no one was looking. It wouldn't look good if the minions saw their Master acting as if someone just put itching powder down his shirt. 'I can't believe she did that. She wrote a bloody love note on my back! Everyday it's like she gets stupider.' I glared at her. She wasn't even looking at me. She was looking at the floor and muttering to herself. 'Probably about bloody France again.' I growled and scratched again. She used permanent ink and my body was shedding the top layer of skin over and over to get rid of the bloody note. I heard crumbling as one of the crews hit pay dirt.  
  
"MASTER!" One of my minions yelled.  
  
"Yeah, yeah. I know we're through." Grabbing the lantern, I headed for the opening. I heard the idiot's mouth snap shut as he scrambled away from me. It was a good thing he did because I might have ripped his head off. I heard Harmony grunt as she climbed up after me. 'She's whiny, clingy, and an idiot. No sex is worth this.' I gazed around the crypt. 'Great, this place is fucking full of gems. Oh, well. It's got to be that big green one. Cause it's big.'  
  
"Ooh, pretty. Can I take stuff?" Doesn't she ever shut up?  
  
"Take whatever you want, I don't care." I ripped the necklace with the gem off the skeleton, sending its head flying. I heard Harmony jabbering but ignored her. I reached for a cross. 'Ow! Ow! Ow!' I grabbed my blistered hand. I wanted to hop around in pain but Master Vampires don't hop around. Harmony hadn't stopped talking. I watched her mouth go up and down, up and down, ignoring the nonsense coming out. 'Enough's enough.' I ripped a piece of wood off a stand and shoved it through her non-beating heart. The feeling of relief I got from staking her soon turned to surprise as her chest healed. 'No poof? The Gem.' I pushed her in front of the cross. She showed no sign of pain just kept talking. I ripped the ring off her finger. Paying no attention to her babbling as usual. I pushed past her. "Well now the real fun begins."  
  
Bryan  
  
I hated waking up because when I woke up I had to face what had happened while I was out. This time the atmosphere had changed, not literally. We were still underground, but the tension that had hung in the air for as long as I'd been held had changed to--well it felt like the end of a game when the underdog had just pulled off a major win. I could hear muffled laughter from above along with crashing. My brain wasn't firing on all thrusters but I easily figured out that the vampires were drunk. I filed this change away and continued with my ignoring.  
  
Time passed, with me trying not to notice and praying for unconsciousness, then the party spilled into where I was kept. A group of vampires tumbled in, giggling and staggering into each other. I noticed the thousands of dollars worth of gold and gems covering them mostly because they seemed so out of place over their lightly dirt dusted clothes. Ginger was the first to focus.  
  
"Sh." *Snort* *Giggle*. "SH!" She commanded, shoving the closest one who had ignored her hard enough into the wall that dirt showered down on him. The others quickly quieted and edged away from her, afraid she'd become angry with them.  
  
I shivered. I couldn't blame them. Every time I moved I felt the pull of scabs. Ginger had a fondness for pain. She'd slice me up and lick the blood off me. Then.I shuddered away from the memories. Ginger was nasty. Nastier than any of the others. And they knew it. She was beautiful, with flaming red hair curling around her face and ruby red lips. I'd never been as terrified of anyone in my life as I was of her. The others would just feed on us. Sometimes mocking us first. Ginger sliced layers off and reveled in our screams.  
  
Ginger held her glare for a few moments then turned to those of us chained up on the wall and smiled. I gulped and backed up until my back hit stone. The wounds on my back made me want to cry out but I swallowed the noise. The guy next to me started shaking and his shackles rattled, adding a tinkling sound to the silence. I was seriously wishing I wasn't conscious at this point.  
  
"We don't need to hide in this hole anymore. The Slayer is as good as dead. We'll finish off the meat while it's still fresh." She reached over and pulled a crown out of a vampire's hands. He started to glare but looked away pretty quickly when he realized whom he was glaring at. "And let it be food fit for a King." Ginger jammed the crown onto the head of the lone female lining the walls. The girl gave a whimper in pain and I saw blood start to leak down into her ravaged blonde hair. I felt a twinge of pity for her but only a little. I hadn't wanted to know the people in Hell with me so I didn't know her. She was just another piece of furniture making up the scenery. No, I was feeling a sense of relief because I finally knew this was over.  
  
After a few seconds Ginger tapped her feet impatiently. The other vampires shared startled looks then rushed to coat us in the jewelry they'd been decked in.  
  
A squirrelly looking vampire who looked like a paper pusher shoved some of his rings on my fingers and draped a robe semi-around me. He didn't even look at me but kept glancing back at Ginger as if checking for her approval. A petite blonde shuffled up next. She gave me a sexy smile before slipping a string of pearls over my head. She then leaned forward and planted a kiss on my forehead. I shivered as I felt cold lips on my skin. The memories of Ginger's cold lips whispered all over my body, making my stomach clench. She pulled away and gave me a hungry smile before grabbing a huge silver bracelet from her wrist. She pulled on it and it came apart in pieces with a click. She fit it around my neck and I heard another click as it snapped shut. I blinked in surprise as the blonde sauntered way. I twisted my head a little and felt what I had assumed was a bracelet rubbing against my neck.  
  
'I've been collared!'  
  
I hadn't believed I could feel anything through my fear but I found surprisingly that I could. I felt disgusted. I was about to die like a trussed up ham. After weeks of being abused my soul gave one last cry then fell silent.  
  
The vampires all pulled back and Ginger inspected their work. After a few moments of letting them fidget she gave her following a nod of imperial approval.  
  
Ginger turned to me and took a step forward. I noticed the blonde who'd collared me looking a bit put out that Ginger had taken her meal. I kind of wished she'd got me. I joined my wall mate in shaking. This wasn't going to be pleasant.  
  
I watched Ginger coming, feeling helpless. Around three feet away Ginger lurched forward as the room twisted. I jerked in my chains while I watched her floundering. Ludicrously I was reminded of a mime in an invisible box. When Ginger regained her equilibrium her face had become distorted, her brow ridges rippling across her forehead. Her eyes blazed yellow and fangs dropped down. I looked away. I knew I was in for it now, I'd only seen that face when she was angry, hungry, or aroused. Either way it never ended well.  
  
"What the hell is--"A muffled boom and a loud crack interrupted her. The crack reverberated throughout the room and more followed it. The vampires who had been feeding, stumbled. The walls started screaming and crumbling.  
  
Ginger managed to stay on her feet until the ceiling started falling. I watched, mystified, as huge chunks of stone crushed vampires and humans alike, ripping appendages off and grinding blood into the dirt.  
  
I looked up just in time to see a boulder larger than me falling towards my head. I quickly looked back down and shut my eyes.  
  
'God--'  
  
Anya  
  
When I was growing up girls didn't go to school. Boys didn't go either unless they were nobles. The only good schools were run by the church too. I looked around the campus of SDU. 'Boy, have things changed.'  
  
I shook my head then bent to check my school map. I was headed to the administration offices. I was here for a purpose after all. I was going to enroll for the semester.  
  
This wasn't what I'd imagined for my life. I'd had a good job, one I was pretty good at if I say so myself, and here I was wondering what to do with myself. I was bored out of my mind. So here I was. I was going to attend college for the same reason I'd stayed in high school, because it gave me something to do. It was more of a someplace to be actually because in high school I'd made sure to get the complete understanding of every subject before going to grant Cordelia's wish. Appearing stupid was not an asset to gain popularity. Even without the educational purpose going to school is supposed to fulfill, it gave me something to do everyday. It was a routine that helped cushion the loss of my powers. I'd found myself trying to create some stability to counter my feelings of loss. I was going to college now because I had found just how frustrating boredom can be.  
  
'At least this should be more of a challenge since I don't already know everything.' Though that in itself was frustrating. For over a thousand years my powers had let me do whatever I wished. It felt like I was always reaching for something no longer there. With a sigh I shoved away the by now familiar longing.  
  
I looked down at my map once more. 'I think I'm here, so I go that way.'  
  
Looking up and shifting to turn I stopped in surprise at the sight of Xander barreling towards me.  
  
"Hi, honey." He paused in front of me, leaned over and gave me a quick peck on the cheek and one of his goofy smiles. "Bye, honey. I have to go save the day."  
  
I watched him run off, feeling stunned. 'My boyfriend is a strange man.'  
  
Spike  
  
'I always loved a good sucker punch.' Fighting with the Slayer was just as I remembered it. Barbs being thrown, both physically and mentally. All around jolly good fun. I smiled as I threw the confrontation the Slayer just had with her newest boy-toy back in her face. The hurt on her face made it worth it even as her fist connected with my chin. I wanted to stop and rub my hurting jaw but that would be a sign of weakness, besides she didn't know it hurt. 'Damn ring, doesn't stop it from hurting. Just from killing.' When the fact that it was actually day registered in that pretty airhead brain of the Slayer's I got another thrill at the shock on her face. That shock soon transformed into anger. The kick that landed in my stomach went a long way to wiping my smile off my face. If I had breath it would have been knocked out of me. 'Maybe making her angry wasn't such a great idea.' Even with my invincibility the Slayer was wiping the floor with me. The sun's brightness was hurting my eyes and I just wasn't used to fighting with this much light. Everything was so much more distracting and louder as well. The muscles of my back screamed as I hit a telephone pole. 'Ouch.'  
  
Xander  
  
After my initial obligatory useless gesture of help I found myself cooling my heels playing possum against the light post I'd been thrown into, hoping that Buffy'd find some way around the can't-be-staked-hurt-by-the-sun-or- killed-in-any-way clause that came with the Gem's warranty. I had to admit, even given whatever sense of immortality he'd gained from the ring, Buffy was kicking his ass pretty much as usual. Sure, none of the hurts were keeping him down but still she was giving him a beating. I winced as she kicked him in the groin. 'Apparently she's also using him as an anger management tool.'  
  
Finding Buffy was the easiest part of all. I knew her schedule, and of course all I had to do was look for fighting. As I watched Spike get up from another should-be-fatal blow I cursed that Gem. Myself as well. 'There is no such thing as a myth. I should know that by now. Heck, I wouldn't be surprised if the frickin' Grail did exist. Seems just as likely as a ring that can make the wearer invincible.' I'd assumed that what Giles said was good intel and hadn't checked with my other sources like an idiot. 'Damn I've been acting as smart as a jarhead! Why the hell did I set up all those contacts if I wasn't going to use them!' I know very well why. I was too relieved at the time that something that sounded just like me wasn't real. It's hard enough to imagine one vampire impervious to all vampire-like death methods but another? One without a soul? I had shuddered at the thought. It had painted an ugly picture that I hadn't wanted to delve too deeply into. Still I should have looked. Should have checked. Just because I didn't want it to be wouldn't make it not real.  
  
Buffy  
  
'Damn him! This is nothing like Angel. It's not.' I landed another heavy kick to his head. I growled when he just got up again. 'Well girl, how are we going to get out of this one? Can't stake him. Sun obviously isn't doing its job. Got nothing to chop him into tiny bits with. Though knowing that stupid ring he'd probably just reassemble.' I narrowed my eyes at the offending object and found myself struck by how loose it seemed on his finger. 'Hmm. It's worth a try.' Charging him, I let him think he'd gotten me trapped and as we grappled I pulled the ring off his finger. I smiled as I heard Spike start cursing. Letting go he pulled his coat up over his head and ran for the trees. I gave chase but surrendered to the inevitable when he disappeared into the sewers. I definitely didn't want to go down there during the day with all the vampires using it to hide from the sun. I'd be overrun and I'd probably never catch the bastard anyway. 'Vamp has more lives than a friggin cat.'  
  
Giles  
  
I can't believe it's real, and so small. The Gem of Amara was sitting on my table looking so harmless and charming, nothing like the dangerous weapon that it really was.  
  
"I like it." Willow said.  
  
"It's small," Oz said, echoing my own thoughts.  
  
Xander snorted. "Really worth getting my ribs bashed in."  
  
"It's also very dangerous. And we're destroying it," I said.  
  
"We don't destroy it." Buffy's voice was barely louder than a whisper yet I heard it and her determination loud and clear. I glanced at Buffy. She was holding herself with a grim sense of purpose. 'I really want to kill that boy. If I can just find out who..'  
  
"Well, Buffy, any vampire that gets his hand on this is going to be essentially unkillable." A light dawned in my head. "Oh." Of course, Angel.  
  
"I have that gig in L.A. I could swing by," Oz offered.  
  
Buffy nodded and gave Oz a brief smile. "Thanks Oz."  
  
I glanced at Xander, who surprisingly hadn't said anything. I would have thought his dislike of Angel would have made him erupt but he just looked down at my questioning look. I turned back to Buffy. "Buffy, are you sure?" I wasn't entirely comfortable with the thought of any vampire being impervious to death, my own feelings for Angel aside.  
  
Buffy nodded again and met my gaze. "He should have it." I could tell she was determined to do this so I kept my reservations to myself. Buffy was the first to leave. She rushed out like a cat on a hotplate. Willow and Oz were next, Oz stopping to pick up the gem. They gave me a nod then filed out. That left Anya and Xander. I was still slightly curious as to why Anya was here. It seemed that Xander had brought her along but why I didn't know. There had been a round of curious looks but no one asked. She stood but Xander stayed seated. She gave him an inquisitive look. He patted her hand.  
  
"Go on, Ahn. I'll meet you later." She shot him a look then slowly nodded.  
  
Xander conferred on me a piercing gaze. I was so surprised by the seriousness of it that I didn't think to ask why he had stayed. Then he nodded to himself and dug into his pockets. He slid a piece of paper across the table to me. I heard him stand as I looked at the paper. There was a name Parker Abrams-Stevenson Hall RM 104. I jerked up and stared into Xander's eyes. There was a wry smile on his face. I looked at the paper again and when I looked up he was gone, leaving me with three hundred questions and only one answer. 'So, Mr. Abrams, you thought you could hurt my girl and get away with it.' A Ripperish smile spread across my face as I started planning.  
  
Buffy  
  
This street is so deserted. 'I wanted it that way. Demons and vamps would interrupt my thoughts.' Angel deserves the Gem. He works so hard.I know that Spike was wrong. Parker isn't like Angel. I just have to get Parker to forgive me. Then I have to make him see we can be more than one night. We can be more. He's such a nice normal guy.  
  
'What'd I do wrong?'  
  
Harmony  
  
I can't believe Spike left me! He tried to stake me. I thought he loved me! We were good together. Why did my platinum baby do it? If anyone should have dumped anyone it's me. He was always too soft. Didn't like killing the little children and they taste the sweetest! He bathed too much, too. After every meal for heaven's sake! I don't like my men smelling like dumpsters but he should have paid more attention to me than his hygiene. I miss our bubble baths though and the way he would comb my hair..He smoked too much. Ranted too much. He never paid enough attention to me.  
  
'Why'd he leave me?'  
  
Anya  
  
I don't know where this road leads. It fits since I have no idea where I'm headed. This was not the way my life was supposed to go. Love and humanity were the farthest things from my mind--now they're the only things. Xander is as nervous as I am. Today he barely said two words to me and even those were awkward. That time he was rushing off to help Buffy aside. He picked me up for the meeting but he hardly said anything to me the whole time. 'He said he'd see you later.' Yeah but he stayed at Giles'. 'Xander seemed to have a mission in mind. He wasn't ditching me.' I sighed and kept walking. Though I know more of him than his friends, Xander remains a mystery to me. This road is lonely. I hope mine won't be. 


	4. Fright Night

Chapter 4: Fright Night (Bats, spiders, heads, and disappearing friends. Oh my.)  
  
Buffy  
  
Gazing at the ceiling, I pretended to be utterly zoned. I just didn't feel like talking but listening I still felt capable of. I'd set my mind on observe mode, noting everything but nothing really getting absorbed. 'I don't know why Xander insisted we come over to his place to carve pumpkins. That's way too much a happy thing to do when you're not happy and.I'm not happy.'  
  
"I don't know, I was going for ferocious, scary, but it's coming out more dryly sardonic." Xander sounded disappointed but I thought it fit. Dryly sardonic pretty much defines him.  
  
"It does appear to be mocking you with its eye holes." Willow sounded bemused.  
  
"The nose hole seems sad and full of self-loathing." Oz sounded like his usual deadpan self.  
  
I heard cloth rustle. 'Uh oh, I think he's going to talk to me.' "What do you think, Buff?" 'Yep.'  
  
Well maybe for bothering me I'll bore him with my thoughts. Seems like justice to me. "I was just thinking about the life of a pumpkin. Grow up in the sun--happily entwined with others, then someone comes along, cuts you open and rips your guts out."  
  
Xander hesitated, obviously having no idea what to say to that, as I intended, then decided to change the subject. "Okay, and on that happy note, I've got a treat for tomorrow night's second annual Halloween screening. People--prepare to have your spines tingled, your gooses bumped by the terrifying--" I heard him rummaging around. "Phantasm. We can laugh at the scary parts." Xander ended triumphantly.  
  
"What's scary is that we actually do that," Oz put in.  
  
"Yeah well, if they'd consult professionals A.K.A us, scary movies would be scarier. We could make good money." Xander sounded angry at the world. Since I was saddened with the world at the moment I couldn't dredge up the need to empathize.  
  
"I thought we were doing the Alpha Delta thing." Now Willow sounded confused.  
  
"What thing?" There was hurt in Xander's voice.  
  
"The scary house? Sounds kinda lame." I put in my opinion. Don't want to spend Halloween pretending to enjoy it. I don't want to feel good right now.  
  
"It actually borders on fun. You have to go through the scary house maze to get to the party. Which is usually worth getting to. Those guys go all out," Oz defended.  
  
"As witnessed last Friday," Willow pointed out.  
  
I could practically see Oz nodding. "Very true."  
  
"There is a party?" Xander's tone had become kind of resigned, I noted.  
  
"We didn't tell you?" Willow sounded confused.  
  
Xander sighed. "No, it's cool. I'll find something to do."  
  
"You can come."  
  
"Okay, but just so you know I'm inviting my demony girlfriend."  
  
Oz and Willow shared a look. Finally Oz said. "A blast will be had by all."  
  
'That's my cue to leave.' Already their conversation was fading away. "I'm gonna get going."  
  
"Now? Tonight's still...." Xander looked at his watch. "Okay, it's a little mature, but still."  
  
I didn't want to stick around. You guys will continue to try and cheer me up. "I'm sleepy," I lied. "You guys have fun."  
  
"You want me to come with?" Willow asked, sounding worried.  
  
"No, I'm fine." 'Liar.' I left. I could feel their eyes on my back as I did but I ignored their concern.  
  
Riley  
  
I watched as the Professor chewed Buffy out. The strain of whatever her problem was showed on her face. Things weren't going well for her. Usually I was happy when someone was kicked out of class, one less paper to grade, but I felt for Buffy.  
  
"She means it, you know."  
  
Buffy frowned. "Yeah. I got the impression she wasn't saying it to make me laugh."  
  
"You've got to be aware your work's taken a little down turn lately. I can't remember the last time I've seen your hand up." Come on, work with me, girl.  
  
"Does stretching count?"  
  
I sighed. Appealing to her work ethic wasn't going to work. Time to be sympathetic. "Look, things get pretty intense freshmen year, as I dimly recall. Too much fun or not enough?"  
  
Buffy hesitated. "Both actually." 'There's the trouble.'  
  
I gave her the assignments. "Yeah, well, you just got to keep your priorities. Prof. Walsh is worth your time."  
  
She took them with a little too much enthusiasm. "Thanks, I'll get this done tonight."  
  
'Not good.' "Tonight. It's Halloween! What, you're not going to dress up and go party?"  
  
She tapped the notebooks and assignments I'd just given her. "I have a lot of work to do."  
  
I had to say something. She must be having a really rough time of it. "I may be out of line here, and it's not really my business, but you seem like the kind of person that makes things really hard on themselves. Halloween isn't a night for responsibility. It's when the ghosts and goblins come out."  
  
I saw something flash across her face. "That's actually a misnomer."  
  
'What a strange thing to say. Wonder what she means by that.' "Well, I didn't mean real ones."  
  
'For all I know the real ones hate this holiday because it pokes fun at them. Then again they could be using it as a cover to feed without people noticing.' Buffy smiled and looked down. "But, hey, there is some good scary fun to be had on campus tonight." 'That I won't be enjoying.'  
  
"Yeah? What are you doing?" She'd perked up a little. Good.  
  
"Well, I'm going to sit here and grade papers." 'I hate lying.'  
  
Buffy turned to go. "Scary." At least I cheered her up.  
  
I grinned at her. "Very." 'Not as scary as what I'll really be doing.'  
  
"Well, thanks for the pep talk, coach." Did her grin just get bigger?  
  
"Don't make fun. I worked long and hard to get this pompous." All's fair in teasing and teaching, as I say.  
  
"No, I mean it." Suddenly Buffy was somber again.  
  
Now I hesitated. The thought that she was so unhappy upset me. "You're welcome."  
  
Buffy smiled and walked out the door while I stood looking at her retreating back. When she was completely gone I shook it off. I had to get ready for my real job.  
  
Xander  
  
I think one of the most annoying sounds ever in existence is the ringing of the telephone. Only thing worse is my great aunt Edna's voice and maybe the sound of a Thraisk demon, damn those things can wail. So when I was woken by my ringing phone to say I wasn't happy was understatement. Picking up the receiver I mumbled groggily, "Uhn.."  
  
A rich sensual recorded woman's voice answered me. "Home alone on a Friday night?" her voice drawled. "Lonely? In need of some companionship? Press one to talk to a woman. Two to talk to a man. Three to--" I slammed the phone down on the hook.  
  
"In this town three's probably for a demon." Rubbing my face, I looked at the clock. "Okay you know you need a life when you're asleep alone in your parent's basement by 9:00 p.m. on a Friday and you're talking to yourself." 'Maybe I should take her up on the offer.' I threw off the afghan I'd grabbed before crashing and looked around at my life. A leaky, moldy, bare walled, cement hole. A damn couch to sleep on when the bed gets soaked from the leak in the ceiling. A chair with a broken arm, a coffee table covered with last year's worth of magazines, and a rusty sink. The old-as-dirt washer and dryer set sitting against the wall were silent testimony to how much this sucked yet how little I could change things since this was not my house. My hunting clothes locked in a trunk with my weapons in case my dad ever sobered up enough to look for anything worth selling like he did from time to time. 'I should have done what Adam wanted me to and faked my death.' Even as I thought it there wasn't much enthusiasm in the thought. 'Who am I kidding? Definitely not me.'  
  
A thud reverberated from the ceiling above me. Then a crash. Then feminine giggling echoed hollowly and wetly through my chamber of horrors. Fury built inside me then disgust took way. 'Damn that bastard. I can't stay here for sure.' I used to wonder when I was younger how come my father retained his fantastical looks after years of hitting the bottle and harder substances. It all fell into place when I found out about the Hellmouth. I figured it supported the local evil.  
  
Still what can I do? I don't want to leave Sunny-D but I have no skills that I can legitimize. Oh, sure these days I swap theoretical math equations with professors over the Internet and I'm part of an anonymous group of military personnel that get together to plot the destruction of corrupt secret op's but how the heck do you get paid for those sorts of things? And how would I be able to explain it to the Scoobs? For that matter I don't really need to work. Mallory the twisted s.o.b. that he was had been a genius who knew how to play the markets and how to save up for a rainy day. There is a couple mill stashed around the globe in accounts along with a house in Borneo and in the Bahamas and in India and in New Hampshire for some strange reason. I need to do some major redecorating in those places before I ever set foot in any of them though, since blood and skulls aren't really my style.  
  
'I don't know why I'm even worrying. They probably wouldn't even notice.' I knew I was being uncharitable but Wills and Buffster hadn't paid much attention to me for a long while. They didn't even notice that I gained a sudden dose of fashion sense after all their years of harping on my style. Cautiously at first I started replacing my wardrobe, taking a chance that they wouldn't notice that my clothes had become a lot more expensive and was disappointed when I was proven right. While I was glad I didn't have to defend my--ah--"outfits" anymore I wished they weren't so wrapped up in their own little worlds. 'After all, they are the reason I'm sticking around in this crummy excuse for a life.' I am glad I don't have to cruise the Salivation Army for my clothes but they haven't been paying any attention whatsoever to me or they would have noticed I no longer look like a Technicolor rainbow. That hurt. It broke the semi-hope that was at odds with the whole idea of hiding. The stupid hope that they'd detect the differences in me and would force the truth out of me.  
  
Along with all the physical remnants of the demented Quinn Mallory there still was the mental mess. Now his memories joined the Praying Mantis Lady, the Mayor, Nam, and my father in my nightmares. The man had serious issues, which I inherited, upon his death. 'Not like I didn't have enough before.' Resting my elbows on my knees, I put my face in my hands. They say there's a fine line between genius and insanity--well Mallory crossed it so many times he zigzagged. Sometimes I find myself scribbling down equations that, before taking his head, would have made as much sense to me as a Korean sonnet in Korean. That's why I joined the chat group. It releases frustrations and I have fun kicking some old fogies' butts. The internet has become my lifeline. I bought a laptop cause it was easy to store. Another gift from the ghosts that haunt me. Colonel Dean Liu was extremely skilled in computers. I would have called him tech support except he was the leader of his black op unit. I enjoy most of the things I got from the Colonel. He had a nice life till it ended. He had a happy childhood and good friends. Though waking up reliving his nightmares is no treat. Catching up on the eleven years of computer advances that had occurred after his death was hard work but it was worth it. The internet is anonymous, the perfect escape.  
  
There was a nagging feeling trying to drag me out of my funk. 'There is something I'm supposed to be doing..' I sat up and snapped my fingers. "The haunted house party at Alpha Delta." After our failed attempt to drag Buffy out of her depression I found out about the party. I felt another pang at the proof of my friends' disregard of me. I remembered our last few words about Parker and my game face slipped on. That bastard needed to learn a lesson. A smile twisted my features as I remembered the satisfaction I'd felt when I'd slipped Ripper--not Giles--Parker's address. I had a feeling vengeance was going to be coming a-calling for the player. I shook off my vampire side, balancing the immortal and vampire again, and put the thought aside. 'Later.'  
  
I'd helped Oz set up the stereo at their place and I asked Anya to come with. 'How could I have forgotten?' Panting and moaning reverberated around me. 'Oh yeah.' So what am I going to wear? If this year is a rerun.I'd better keep my weapons handy. Now what goes with a 9mm handgun? I could practically see the light shining above my head. A slow smile spread across my face as I reached for the phone. Hopefully the Tuxedo rentals were still open.  
  
Willow  
  
I know this is going to be fun. After all, I spent the last Halloween as a ghost. Can't get much worse than dead. I snuggled up against Oz as we walked. Buffy's dressed as Little Red Riding Hood. It's funny. I just don't think it suits her. I look down at my costume and smile. Oz's idea was cuter than I thought it'd be. It was cheap and easy for him and it gave me an excuse to use my scrounging skills. Finding knitted cloth that looked just like chain mail on short notice is like.like finding a real looking Eskimo suit. I like the challenge of making everything look authentic. 'Mom never notices the extra charges to her credit card anyway.' I look at Buffy again. She's looking out of place. 'Hey, she looks lost just like Little Red Riding Hood.' I cheered up at my analogy then felt a little sad because it wasn't really a good thing.  
  
'Hey there's Xander!' I happily diverted my chain of thought to feeling joy at his arrival. After the initial confusion about his costume I looked him over again. 'The persona actually seems.right. It's funny I just never thought of him as the James Bond type before. There's nothing mysterious or dangerous about Xander. Is there?' I felt confused and a little scared because I realized I didn't know the answer to that. We didn't just sit and talk anymore or call each other in the middle of the night. 'He hasn't changed, though. Of course not. This is Xander.' Yet my thoughts lacked conviction. My doubts made me take another look at him. The suit fit him like a glove; he made it look classy even though it was clearly from Tux R Us. The way he moved, the way he walked.. I pushed observations aside. 'We've drifted so far apart I'm seeing him like a stranger. I miss him. I need to talk to Xander more.'  
  
I looked up at the Alpha Delta house. It looked like the usual frat house, rundown and cheaply made, but I felt a tremor run down my spine at the sight. I ignored it, thinking it was just gloom at finally grasping that I had been losing my friend without even realizing it. I pressed closer to Oz, trying to draw his warmth into my suddenly cold body.  
  
Buffy  
  
'Here I go. Fifth wheel again. God, even Xander has a date. So what if it is with Anya the ex-demon? He's not alone and I am.' I sighed and looked down at my basket full of weapons. I felt so ridiculous tagging along to this thing. I don't even know why I'm doing this. 'Probably because your friends bugged you until you agreed. Heck, even Giles told you to have fun.' I swatted my conscience away. I shouldn't have come. I'll just be a party pooper.  
  
Suddenly a group dressed as commandos burst through the hedges directly into our path, interrupting my mope fest. 'How rude.' I glared at their retreating backs.  
  
Xander  
  
No use borrowing trouble, as my grandmother used to say. Still, as I stepped into the foyer, unease settled in my heart. 'Bats. I hear bats.' Looking up, I strained my senses. 'There's something else too. But it's muffled.'  
  
"Ugh! Get if off!" I was distracted from my thoughts by Willow. She danced around for a bit, swiping at her shoulders. Then she stopped shuddering. "I hate spiders." She gave us a weak grin. Oz checked her over to make sure the pesky critter was gone. He gave her a nod. She tried to detach her head and see her back side. "Are you sure it's off?"  
  
"Yeah." At Willow's doubting look Oz gave her another nod to show he was really sure.  
  
"At least it wasn't a frog, huh Wills?" She glared at me. Then she glanced around.  
  
"Uh Buffy? Where is everyone?" Buffy and Wills began searching around the hall, Oz following tamely behind but I was no longer paying attention. I had already begun eyeing the severed head sitting as a centerpiece in front of the sheet draped stairs. I couldn't help but marvel at how realistic it looked. It reminded me of the poor fellow whose head my sword got stuck in during my fight with Drusilla. I shied away from the memories and took a deep breath to calm myself. 'Tonight was supposed to be a fun night. No worries. No flashbacks.' Then my mind registered what my nose already had. 'I smell blood. Real blood.'  
  
I walked up to get a closer look at the head sitting on the stand in a punch bowl. I took another couple sniffs to confirm it. 'Yeah, it smells of blood. In fact the air seems full of it.' My heart took up residence in my stomach as I realized that not only was it real blood but a real head. The eyes were still round and clear, not filmy and flat, so he'd been killed less than five minutes ago. A death like his would have been messy and loud. Someone should have heard it. Unless.. I finally identified the muffled sounds I'd been hearing: screams. 'What's one more in a crowd?' Inwardly I groaned. "Guys. I have a bad feeling about this. 'Cause unless these guys are going all out for accuracy--and I mean all out--" I turned around and found I was talking to myself. "We're in big trouble.." Doing a full circle, I checked and saw no sign of my friends. They'd completely disappeared without me even hearing them leave. I sighed. "And it's getting bigger by the second."  
  
"RELEASE ME." It wasn't a shout but the voice rumbled throughout the entire house. I could feel the vibrations in my bones. I glanced around, trying to determine the source. Nothing magically presented itself as I had halfway expected.  
  
"Much bigger."  
  
Willow  
  
One second Xander was there then I turned around and he was gone. "Umm Buffy.." I tapped her on the shoulder. She was looking up and down another hall trying to figure out where everyone was just like I'd been doing a moment ago.  
  
"What?!" she said impatiently, not stopping her searching.  
  
"We seem to be short one Scooby." I said pointing to the empty space where Xander had been.  
  
Oz turned and looked also. "Huh." Buffy was a little more vocal.  
  
"Where has he gone now?" Her tone was full of annoyance and I couldn't help but feel a little bit uncomfortable about it, especially because of my earlier thoughts. 'She makes it sound as if this is all Xander's fault.' I glanced at Oz. He raised an eyebrow in return. Buffy was so focused I don't think she even noticed. She marched over to a closet I was sure hadn't been there a second ago. Now that I saw it, I noticed it was shaking and there was a slight hissing noise coming from it. Buffy ripped the door open to reveal a terrified man clutching a basket like a child would clutch a doll. He looked scared and he was shaking hard enough that the walls of the closet shook with him. He was so pale he was almost translucent with red blotches under his eyes. Before I had been feeling uneasy, not uncommon in my life, now I felt a growing sense of dread, also not uncommon. I groaned. Halloween must be cursed.  
  
"I'm sorry. I didn't know. I'm sorry," the boy mumbled as he rocked back and forth.  
  
Oz crouched down in front of him. "Chaz."  
  
"I didn't know," Chaz whispered, clutching the basket closer.  
  
"What's happening?" Oz asked.  
  
Chaz began rocking harder. "It ah...."  
  
Buffy got impatient and demanded, "What is it?"  
  
"It's alive. It's alive," Chaz began repeating, scared by the harsh tone Buffy used. I felt really sorry for him. He looked about ready to die of fright.  
  
"What's alive?" she asked again, more gently this time. "Chaz, what happened here?" Chaz looked up and screamed. I whirled around just as a skeleton stabbed Buffy from behind. Buffy turned, knocked its head aside and then kicked it in the middle. It laid back on the ground, once again plastic. Buffy stared at it then checked her shoulder. There was only a thin red line on her shoulder blade. I pressed my hand against my heart, trying to keep it where it belonged.  
  
Buffy  
  
'Ok-ay. That was a new one. Never been attacked by a plastic skeleton before.' A girl's scream reverberated throughout the hall. I swallowed my shock. Chaz crawled back into the closet and closed the door.  
  
"Cowering in a closet is starting to seem like a reasonable plan," Oz observed. I wanted to agree with him but then I noticed that there was no closet.  
  
"What closet?" Oz and Willow did a double take but the closet didn't reappear. I turned from the now harmless decoration and the disappearing closet to my friends. 'I need to get them out of here to safety.' "I'm gonna make my way upstairs and see if there are any people up there. You guys find a way out of the house and use it. You guys go get Giles. We'll need his help to figure out what's going on. I'll look for Xander." 'And try to kill whatever's doing this while they're out of danger. God, where is Xander? He's always getting into trouble. Now I have to find him first.' I turned to head deeper into the house.  
  
"No." Willow's firm response made me stop in my tracks.  
  
I whirled back around. "What?! Will, I'm telling you.."  
  
"You're telling me? You're telling me?!?"  
  
"I can't do my job if I have to worry about each of your safety!" Gritting my teeth, I tried to keep my anger from my voice.  
  
"It's not your decision!" she yelled in my face.  
  
'The heck with it.' I bit out, "Got to disagree with you there."  
  
"Oh, of course you do. Being the Slayer doesn't automatically make you boss. You're as lost as the rest of us." Willow crossed her arms over her chest, clearly saying she'd made up her mind.  
  
"What are we talking about?" 'Thank you Oz.' I knew he would stop her from doing anything foolish.  
  
"It's a simple incantation, a guiding spell for travelers when they become lost or disoriented. I can find him and anyone else trapped in here. You don't have to play guess and check. It will take us straight to them."  
  
It sounded like a reasonable idea but I didn't like it. "And how does it work?"  
  
"It conjures an emissary from the beyond that--lights the way." She tried to sound completely confident but I knew I had her.  
  
"Conjuring. Will, let's be realistic here. Okay, your basic spells are usually only fifty-fifty." 'Back me up Oz. You don't want her doing heavy magic either.' He stayed silent. Then I remembered the promise he'd made Willow to stand by her. 'Damn. I'm not going to get any help on that front.'  
  
Flustered, Willow stuttered out, "Oh yeah? Well, so is your face!" Then she stalked off. Confused, I tried to make out what she'd meant.  
  
"What?!" I went after her. "What does that mean?"  
  
Willow turned around. "I'm not your sidekick!" She whirled back around and resumed her frontal retreat.  
  
I tried one last appeal "Willow.." She didn't even turn around.  
  
Oz gave me one final look then turned and ran after her. I shook my head. 'When her spell doesn't work they'll go and find Giles. Willow is smart, she'll come to her senses.'  
  
Giles  
  
I got dressed up in this stupid costume and pretended to be all bloody cheerful specifically so I wouldn't be bored for this bloody holiday and what do I find myself doing? Sitting on my bloody couch holding a bloody bowl of candy. I should have bloody known better. Little kiddies don't live in this neighborhood. I sighed. Where's a demon when you need one?  
  
A pounding started at my door. 'Demons don't knock.' I winced, as the pounding got more incessant. 'Even like that.' Must be trick-or-treaters, finally. "Coming!" Gathering up my bowl, I plastered a smile on my face then swung open the door. "Happy Hall.." I was surprised when Anya, dressed in a giant bunny suit, brushed past me.  
  
"Xander is in trouble. We've got to do something, right now!"  
  
I stared at her, my mouth hanging open. "Anya." I felt the need to confirm her actual presence in my apartment.  
  
"Are you listening? Xander is trapped!" I shook off my shock. She most definitely was really here. Though her distress over Xander was.anomalous.  
  
"Uh, ah, where are Buffy and the others?" Concern for my charges overrode my curiosity.  
  
Anya rolled her eyes like she was talking to an idiot. "They're trapped, too, but we've got to save Xander!"  
  
I took off my ridiculous sombrero and sat down. 'I got what I asked for I guess. She was a demon and this situation has the potential to contain another one. Be careful what you wish for indeed.' "Slow down. I need you to be more specific." I tried being patient, seeing as how confused wasn't working.  
  
"Uhm, ah, we were supposed to meet at this house, and I got there and there was no door where a door should be. And then I see this girl standing in a window, and then poof! She's gone."  
  
"She vanished from the window?" This is quite a bit of alarm for just that. I kept that to myself though.  
  
"No, the window vanished from the house." Now that worried me. I hadn't known whether to take this girl seriously, she did after all have a rather stained past, but what she described had a ring of truth.  
  
"Hmm. Matter and reality distortion." I got up and retrieved a book from a shelf. "Like a summoning spell's temporal flux."  
  
"What?"  
  
I looked up from the pages. "Hmm? Oh, never mind. I just need to get some- -supplies together." I bustled over to my supply cabinet then paused and looked over at her. Anya certainly looked worried. I wasn't sure why she was or even if it really was genuine but I felt the need to say something comforting. "I wouldn't worry about Xander. At least he's amongst friends."  
  
Oz  
  
"She thinks I'm not ready to be a full blown witch! I can handle the dark forces as good as anyone else. It's not that hard. I-It's just a guiding spell and I'm careful and all." I watched as Willow raged, not saying that I thought Buffy's fears had merit, that I didn't really want her reaching into that darkness. I'd promised her I'd stand by her decisions and I would. Looking around at the room we'd found ourselves in, I felt uneasy.  
  
"This floor used to have windows."  
  
Willow ignored me as she focused on something else. "Look. We found the stairs." She started walking up them. "Buffy didn't find the stairs, no sir!" 'She's still venting.' I shook my head and started following her up the stairs.  
  
Then suddenly I felt it. The shudder of the change. 'No. It can't be.' Another ripple swept through me. 'It's not possible! It's not a full moon!' I bit my tongue to keep from crying out. Fear gripped my insides and turned them to solid blocks of ice. Slowly I brought my hands up. I almost lost it when I saw the lengthened hair and sharpening nails. I bit the inside of my check and realized that my canines had also been affected as I drew blood. I started backing away from Willow down the stairs. Willow turned, a surprised expression on her face. Willow, my beautiful Willow. I have to get away before I change. I can't hurt her. 'It'll kill me.' "Stay away from me," I managed to get out around my mouth full of teeth. I felt the change coming faster. I turned and ran from my love. 'Don't change. Don't change. Don't change.'  
  
I heard her voice echoing after me. "Don't leave me.."  
  
Xander  
  
'I know I've only been in the Alpha Delta building once but I'm pretty damn sure that it wasn't nearly this big.' After wandering through room after room I found myself completely lost. 'This is doing me no good. There's magic a foot.' Sighing, I surveyed the current room I was in. One entire wall was covered in a solid mirror. 'Why would a bunch of jocks have a mirror like this? Well, one that isn't on the ceiling? Oh, who cares? I have to find the girls, not marvel at the Alpha Delta's decorating.' I turned back to the door I came through only to find it was no longer there. 'What the....' I spun back around. A check of the other two walls revealed that I hadn't just gotten turned around, but that there were no exits. 'Oh boy.'  
  
Willow  
  
After Oz inexplicably started changing I became more determined than ever to perform the guiding spell. Xander and Oz were the two most important people in my life. I wasn't going to leave them trapped in this horrific, haunted house. Concentrating, I put all my power into the spell, ignoring the sliver of doubt I myself felt about my abilities. I was allowed to feel hesitant. Buffy was supposed to be supportive and reassure me that I could do it. As the small green sprite appeared before my eyes I felt proud and excited. 'It worked.'  
  
On the high of my success I joyfully asked the tiny sprite to lead me. I was puzzled when it instead whipped around my head then split into two. Fear unfurled in my heart. 'I must have done it wrong.' They quickly split into two again and again. 'If I have no control, who knows what they're going to do?' All I could do was watch, terrified, as they multiplied. Soon there was a green cloud of tiny sprites surrounding my head. As one they descended like angry bees, stinging and burning me with every touch. I tumbled off the table, swatting at them. "Oz--hel--" I was cut off by the swarm. I had to get away. Rising to my feet I ran, trying to out run the horde I'd conjured as they attacked me from all sides.  
  
Buffy  
  
"Oz--hel--" 'That sounds like Willow.' I spun around and tried to locate the source.  
  
'Why didn't she leave like I told her to?'  
  
"Willow," I called. 'I think it came from in here.' It was an empty corridor with a door at the end. I tried the knob but it was locked. 'Oh well, I'll have to do it the old fashioned way.' Backing up, I got a running start and rammed into the door. It burst into a shower of splinters as I expected. My momentum carried me into the room. Where I promptly found there was no floor. All I had a chance to think was, 'Great,' before I hit the ground.  
  
Laying on my back trying to get breath back into my lungs, I watched the door swing slowly shut above me. 'Ow.' "Basement. I must be in the basement," I voiced, vexed.   
  
"All alone." The voice was hollow and echoed. It sent shivers down my spine. That was what I'd been thinking. How I felt so alone.  
  
I pushed myself up. Better to face whatever on my feet than lying helpless on the floor. "Who said--that?"  
  
A guy walked around the corner. His head was tilted at a sickening angle. I'd seen that before. Vampires have a peculiar fondness for breaking necks. The guy was dead but not a vampire. He was already starting to smell. "They all ran away from you. They always will. Open your heart to someone and.." He smiled at me, a strange pantomime of a smile on his bloated lips. "But don't fret, little girl, you're not alone--" Suddenly the ground burst open beneath me. Hands grabbed me, their flesh slipping loosely, unconnected to muscle--like that of the deceased. I couldn't help it, I screamed.  
  
"Anymore."  
  
I fought, but there were too many; they were dragging me down.  
  
Broken neck guy continued to talk as I struggled. "No matter how hard you fight, you just end up in the same place." I managed to break free. Gasping for breath, I crawled along the floor on my hands and knees, kicking at the dead hands reaching for me. "I don't see why you bother." 'Because, you bastard, I don't give up.' I reached a small door. 'Was that there before? Never mind.' Went through and slammed it behind me. I took a deep breath then looked around. I was in a big room with a pentagram on the floor.  
  
A memory poked at me. "I'm upstairs. The goat room." I thought that it was in the attic. How'd I go from the basement to the attic? My stomach doing flip-flops, I walked slowly into the room. There were college kids in costumes cowering all along the walls, whimpering. 'Damn.'  
  
Anya  
  
'When I get my hands on him I'm gonna.oh I don't know what I'm going to do but.oooh he'll pay for making me so worried.' I bounced up and down impatiently. Giles was taking an inordinate amount of time examining the place where the door used to be. 'Who cares! We need to find Xander!' "Well?" I put all my worry and impatience into my voice, trying to get him to move along.  
  
"We're gonna have to create a door." 'Well we obviously can't use the old one.' He snapped his book shut and walked over to his bag.  
  
'Wait..' "Create a door. You can do that?" It takes a lot of power to change reality. I should know. I didn't know he had it in him.  
  
Giles got up with a chainsaw in his hands. "I can." 'Not what I was expecting but if it saves Xander who cares?'  
  
Xander  
  
I was searching the wall for the exit for the hundredth time when I saw something move out of the corner of my eye. I turned and ended up laughing at myself. I'd just been seeing my reflection. My laughter died in my throat when my reflection smiled at me. A vicious, predatory smile. One I wasn't wearing. I swallowed, hard, as mirror me walked closer till he looked as if he was going to run into the glass. Like inside the mirror was another dimension and he'd just walked to the separating wall. Unconsciously I moved closer as well. I reached out to touch the glass and was once again disturbed by the fact that my reflection didn't mirror me.  
  
"BOO!" my reflection shouted. I jerked back, dropping my hand. His chuckle made me shiver. It didn't sound like me. Yet it was my voice.  
  
"Who are you?" I hoarsely whispered around my choked up throat.  
  
My reflection's smile became evil and taunting. "I'm the you that you keep locked inside. You know me." His face shifted, revealing his demonic visage. "You can't ignore me forever. Sooner or later you won't even want to. You already want to let go. Why save people too weak to help themselves? They're idiots that bury their heads in the sand. Not worth the effort. Your 'friends'?" He practically spat out the word. "What kind of friends are they? They push you aside. They think you're a weak nothing. Show them how weak you are! The world will bow at your feet. Take power! Revel in their blood!" Suddenly my lips were covered in blood, as were my hands. I could smell it. I could taste it. My face started shifting to match the one in the mirror. I heard a growl rising from deep inside. It was taking all my will power not to lick my lips. 'No,' I silently ordered myself. Then the image changed, as if sensing my weakness and trying to press the advantage by attacking on a new front.  
  
I was wearing Quinn Mallory's 18th century get up and an insane grin. I was holding Mallory's head by the hair in one hand and my bloody katana in the other. "You're a murderer." I felt a shiver run down my spine. When he spoke it was through Mallory's severed head while my/his head just kept smiling, no emotion in his eyes. "It's so easy. Power is meant to be used. Why not have fun with it? You know you want to." The other me started talking now with the head creating a creepy dual echo. "Quinn wasn't so different. You just like to pretend he was." Mallory's memories assaulted me--all the delight and ecstasy he had derived from death and suffering. They began merging with my own. With growing horror, I realized I no longer could discern between them. My face took the place of Quinn's in all the scenes. I was the one who laughed as I drove a knife into a man's guts. I was the one kissing Cordelia. I no longer knew where I ended and my acquired memories began. Then there was a snap and Mallory was as alien as before but I could still remember feeling as if it was me taking joy in those things. I felt like I'd rolled in a garbage dumpster.  
  
I blinked, shaking. The image had distorted once more. I suddenly looked like my father. His curly blond hair, sharp nose, and chilling blue eyes replaced my own features. The only way I knew that this was supposed to be me was his height and build. My father was a good four inches taller and a great deal bulkier. Somehow when this incarnation blew out at me, I smelled cheap bourbon. The bastard's drink of choice. "Talk about pretending. How long do you think you'll last before you walk into the bottle? Forget it all. Beat those you love. Anya is always saying the wrong thing. A few good whacks will teach her to keep her yap shut. Worked on you, didn't it? Can't even open it when you want to. Go ahead, give in." My mind became fogged with alcohol. I felt like throwing up. 'Not my father. ANYTHING but my father.' I hazily made out the me in the mirror smiling drunkenly at me then I was on my knees throwing up the contents of my stomach along with the lining. When I had nothing left I still shook with dry heaves. The world swam and I collapsed next to the mess. Even then I couldn't turn away from the mirror. My distorted reflection kneeled down and laughed mockingly at me. He kept on laughing but soon the laughter turned into the sound that haunted my dreams.  
  
I passed out or I just got lost in the alcohol, which ever it was, when my eyes focused on the mirror again--the blond hair and other features that had made me look like the bastard had melted away. He looked like me until he smiled once more. This smile was feral, full of teeth and meant for ripping flesh from bones. Somehow my features became more rugged, shaggy looking. His eyes flashed green and in them I saw no thought. No worries about friends. No feelings of pity, only anger and the hunger for food. Something stirred inside me, responding to the thing in the mirror. Something I had tried very hard to suppress for years. I quickly regretted my earlier thoughts. He was much worse.  
  
A cold voice whispered, 'Others are weak. No good to the pack. Prey. Nothing but the pack. Weakness is death.' Images of the hunt flooded me. The taste of raw flesh filled my mouth. Slowly I rose from the floor. I stared at the mirror, uncomprehending. 'Threat?' I took a deep breath through my nose. 'No scent. No threat.' I looked around. 'Pack gone.' I could smell their scents faintly but only on me. A pushy strawberry-blond flashed through my mind. 'Mate gone. Find pack.' I took another breath and scented blood. 'Hunt first.' I laughed mockingly at the foolish prey that was so weak to wound themselves, making themselves easy kills. I tried to move off to hunt but I could not leave the shiny thing. I growled at it, trying to get it to release me. I bristled when instead more figures joined the unscented one. 'Reflections.'  
  
That word broke the hyena's control. I came back to myself with an echoing howl ringing inside my head. I broke into a cold sweat as I realized what had happened. I had been totally subverted just like the first time. I could practically feel the hyena prowling around with frustration behind my eyes.  
  
The four incarnations of me just grinned as I shook, each flashing their own distinct one. As one they spoke, "You try and lock us up but you know we're here. We're reflections of what you really are but pretend you aren't. You wrap yourself in morals like a cloak but they don't apply to us." They reached through the glass. I wanted to run but I couldn't move. All I could do was stand there as their hands went right through me. I shook and shut my eyes. Their touches left icy tendrils spreading through me. And they laughed. Their laughter filled the air around me. I tried to block it out but the sounds passed right through my hands. I was all that I hated. Who was I kidding? The proof was right before my eyes. 'No. No. It can't be. I don't want to be them. Please no.' I sank to my knees, softly crying out as they whispered and laughed. 'Noooo..'  
  
Jill  
  
I'd been sitting in this corner for an hour, unable to move. My back was broken once more and I was immobilized. No one would help me. They were all too much in the grip of whatever-it-was that was terrifying us. All I knew was at regular intervals it'd shout RELEASE ME loud enough to shake the walls and it was doing this to us. My fear I could manage, barely. I'd lived with it for months. The horrible feeling of nothing below my neck, not knowing if I'd ever feel anything again. I was scared but I wasn't catatonic like half the people around me. The survivors. The room only held about half the people who'd been at the party when I had found my way to the goat room. I hadn't moved from this spot since it had started, I couldn't, but everyone that could scattered. Some running, some crawling, some by walking off in a haze as if seeing something no one else did. One by one they ended up back here, in worse states than they left in. Those that did return, anyway. Unable to move, I was in no more position to help them than they were to help me. No one new had shown up for several minutes and I was hopeful that no one else had gotten pulled into this horror flick we seemed to be living through when they showed up.  
  
First there was a short, red haired guy I thought I'd seen performing with a band once. I blinked my eyes and there he was rocking back and forth mumbling something to himself. It happened sometimes, the suddenly there thing. Chaz, the last one before this, had done that. The new guy was too far away for me to hear what he was saying so I couldn't guess what his fear was. Figuring out other people kept my mind off what was happening to me just like it had the first time. My hope that no one else would be drafted into this was dashed.  
  
Next a dark haired guy in a tux appeared, kneeling in another corner. He had his hands clasped over his ears. His eyes were tightly shut. He just seemed to be trying to block something out. 'Noise maybe? Could be.' I noticed the blood on his face but it wasn't unusual. The girl to my right was as covered in it as Carrie on Homecoming night. I figured she was afraid of blood. One of the jocks had blood pouring from a head wound about two feet from me. He was out cold on the floor. Another girl had cuts opening and closing on her arms. I hadn't looked at Thomas' body since the first time; some invisible assailant had beaten him bloody to the ground. He was either dead or unconscious. I didn't know which. His face was such a gory mess that after the first look I couldn't bare to look again. No blood definitely wasn't unusual.  
  
Then someone else appeared. She was blonde, dressed in a checkered outfit. The tiny door she'd entered through reminded me of Alice in Wonderland. The slightly shocked look on her face helped the association. 'Alice certainly fell down the rabbit hole this time.' I didn't entirely understand what was happening but I knew it was real, too damn frightening to not be. Blondie peered into the corner with the redheaded guy and called, "Oz?"  
  
A petite redhead, running through one of the doors that mysteriously appeared then disappeared, crashed in next. She was swatting at the air, spinning in circles trying to brush invisible somethings off. 'Bugs. She's afraid of bugs.' I'd seen a guy--that one over there in the blue and green shirt--doing the same thing, shouting the whole time to get them off just like her. I waited for them to end up like the rest, mumbling to themselves, rocking back and forth, or staring blankly into the air. Instead I saw movement in the corner. The short, red haired guy had stopped mumbling. He looked at his hands in astonishment then rushed over to Bug Girl.  
  
He grabbed her. "Willow, Willow, Willow, what's wrong?"  
  
She stopped screaming and started shaking in his arms. "Couldn't get them off." She whispered hoarsely.  
  
"It's okay. It's okay." The guy, Oz I guess, pulled the girl, Willow, into his arms. "We're okay." 'They must be a couple.'  
  
Blondie shook her head. "We're not okay. We need to get out of here." I totally agreed with that assessment but the trick was getting out. The doors and windows had a strange tendency to disappear when you went to go through them.  
  
"Buffy." I looked to the other corner where Mr. Tuxedo was rising shakily to his feet. I noted analytically that the blood had been wiped off his face. He glanced quickly around then took a deep breath. "Guys." They must have come in together. They know each other.  
  
"The house separated us. It wanted to scare us," Oz said, taking in the attic and still holding the girl, Willow, in his arms.  
  
"But--we got away," she said plaintively, like she was trying to convince herself.  
  
"No. We were brought here. We all got so scared that we ended up here. Why?" Blondie seemed to know what she was talking about.  
  
I saw something click in tall dark and handsom's face. I was slightly annoyed that I still didn't know his name. He pointed to the creepy pentagram that was painted in the middle of the room. "I saw them painting that. They were copying it out of--" He searched around. Apparently finding whatever, he picked it up. "That!" It was a book. 'A book? What the?'  
  
Willow hastily made her way to him and took it from him. "I think it's Gaelic."  
  
"Can you translate?" Blondie asked.  
  
"RELEASE ME!" 'Great, the voice is back.' The group looked around but I knew from experience there was nothing to see other than cowering college students. "RELEASE ME!"  
  
"Will, give me something." Blondie pleaded to Willow. She certainly looked like a willow--tall, willowy and everything. I didn't know what they thought they were doing but if they knew how to get out of this I was going to give them my first born.  
  
Willow looked around nervously then said, "Okay, uhm, uhm, the icon's called the-the Mark of Gachnar. I-I think this is a summoning spell for something called...."  
  
"Gachnar?" I could practically feel the smirk in Mr. Tuxedo's voice. 'Wait, they're talking like witch craft is real.you know that would sure as hell explain this.'  
  
Willow nodded. "Well, yes. Somehow the beginning of the spell must have been triggered. Uhm, Gachnar is trying to manifest itself, to-to come into being."  
  
Blondie, okay so I knew her name, but what kind of name is Buffy? I liked Blondie better. "How?"  
  
Willow looked appalled. "I-it feeds on fear."  
  
'Eww. Now I'm appalled. It's eating off me!'  
  
Blondie just looked business like. 'Doesn't anything faze her?' "Our fears are manifesting it. We're feeding it. We need to stop."  
  
"If we close our eyes and say it's a dream it'll stab us to death! These things are real."  
  
'Very good point, Tux boy.'  
  
"RELEASE ME!" I wonder if the rumbling is because he feels inadequate in some area? Oh, who am I kidding, I'm scared out of my mind.  
  
"Okay, so our fears are feeding it, if we get everyone out of here--" Blondie was interrupted when the walls started knocking and shaking.  
  
"I don't think Gachnar likes the idea of its free meal walking out the door." I had to agree with him. It sounded like the whole building was going to collapse. Then the door burst open to reveal a rough looking guy with a chainsaw running in his hands. The only thing off about his image was the pair of glasses perched on his nose. He turned off the saw. "Giles? Everyone, it's Giles! With a *chainsaw*." Tux boy sounded shocked at the idea. Then a girl in a ridiculous looking bunny outfit rushed past Giles and hugged mystery man. "Omph. Glad you could make it." He got out as she tried her best to squeeze him to death. I sighed. 'Girlfriend.'  
  
"The walls closed up behind us," this Giles character said, stunning me with his sexy British accent. I never would have figured him for a Brit. Maybe it was the chainsaw. He walked over and took the book from Willow's hands. He peered down at it then claimed, "Gachnar, of course. Its presence infects the reality of the house, but it's not managed to achieve full manifestation. We can not allow this to come into being." 'Why do I suddenly see him as a librarian?'  
  
"But if it does I can fight it, right?" Blondie looked pretty eager for the possibility.  
  
He walked over to her and showed her something in the book. "Buffy, this is Gachnar."  
  
She paled slightly. "I *don't* want to fight that." 'That doesn't sound good.' "So, we break the spell."  
  
"Whatever we do, let's do it fast." Blondie glared at Tux but I was in total agreement, again. I'd had enough of this as well.  
  
Giles began flipping pages. "I have it, I have it. Uhm, 'the summoning spell for Gachnar can be shut down in one of two ways. Destroying the mark of Gachnar--" Blondie walked over to the mark. She put her fist through it, ripping up the floorboards. 'Wow. No wonder she was eager to fight it. Still that was a little bit of overkill. All you'd really need is a wash cloth.' She got up and looked over at Giles with a proud smile. "--is *not* one of them and will in fact immediately bring forth the fear demon itself." 'Oh, great going.' Blondie made a face. I was startled when the mark actually started to glow. I'd sort of accepted that magic was real. But now I was seeing it. Seeing now that I knew it was magic anyway. I'd been seeing magic for hours now if I wanted to get technical about it.  
  
"Look!" Willow shouted.  
  
The floor rumbled as we all stared in horror. Gachnar showed up and he was one ugly dude, but.. 'God, he is tiny, maybe a half a foot tall, if that.'  
  
Blondie looked like she could barely hold in her giggles. "This is Gachnar?"  
  
Tux boy joked, "Big overture. Little show."  
  
Gachnar screamed. "I am the dark lord of nightmares!" His voice was high pitched like a mouse. "The bringer of terror! Tremble before me. Fear me!"  
  
Willow started laughing. "He--he's so cute!"  
  
'I guess she didn't see the damage he did first hand.' I hated the little creature.  
  
Gachnar said, "Tremble!"  
  
Tux bent down. "Who's a little fear demon? Come on! Who's a little fear demon!" Well at least the little bastard was getting his. The sadistic side of me was finding a lot of pleasure in Tux's fun.  
  
Giles grimaced. "Don't taunt the fear demon." 'Demon huh? Well if witchcraft is real, why not demons?'  
  
"Why, can he hurt me?" Tux got back up and raised an eyebrow inquisitively. I noticed he didn't look particularly worried.  
  
"No, it's just.tacky." Hey, I happened to like the taunting. "Be that as it may, Buffy, when it comes to slaying...." 'Slaying? As in killing? Good.'  
  
Blondie smirked. "Size doesn't matter?"  
  
Gachnar looked afraid. "They're all going to abandon you, you know." He said in his tinny voice.  
  
"Yeah, Yeah." Blondie raised her foot real high and stomped. I heard a satisfying squish.  
  
'Oh god, I can feel my bits again.' Joy spread through me as I moved for the first time in hours. I was stiff all over but I could move. I started massaging my legs to get the feeling back. I heard the other partygoers moving around in shock. When I finally got to my feet our rescuers were gone. 'Damn, I can't even thank them. Or find out what the hell that guy's name was. That's going to bug me forever.' I sighed and went to check on the wounded. At least I could help the others now.  
  
Philip  
  
I slid down the porch steps. I let out a scream of pain as I hit the dirt. It took a lot of effort but I flipped myself over and stared at the sky. It never looked so beautiful. 'Oh, thank you, God.' I rolled over again, this time stopping when the agony reduced me to panting in pain. When I regained my breath I started forward once more, ignoring the pain from my shredded legs dragging behind me. Grabbing tufts of grass, rocks, and just plain digging my already bruised and bleeding fingers into the ground, I pulled myself farther away. Inch by torturous inch away from the horror. 'This was supposed to be a night to relax. To have fun.' I felt hysterical laughter building up in me. I quickly suppressed it. If I started really thinking I didn't think I'd be able to go on. I centered my attention on moving forward, not thinking back. My focus was broken abruptly when directly ahead of me a pair of green lights blinked into existence. 'What is that?' There was a low rumbling noise then something flashed in front of me. Before I could blink I felt something wet and warm on the back of my head then everything went dark.  
  
Ryconis  
  
If Jennifer Lowery had lived past its calling she would not have recognized the beast that tore into the poor departed Phillip Marcum's flesh. It no longer looked like the half starved black dog pup she had called in her innocence to scare her stepmother away. Its talon like paws and three-inch incisors she would have recognized. Along with the green slime that even now it was spreading along the ground near its meal. All else had changed. It was twice the size it had been when it tore her and her stepmother to pieces and its fur now shone luxuriously. A third eye was growing in the center of its forehead. Barbs had started to sprout along its backbone. The Hellmouth had agreed well with the beast. For it the town was a veritable feast. Especially since it didn't mind leftovers.  
  
Buffy  
  
I actually felt better. Nothing like stomping an itty-bitty fear demon to lift your spirits. Besides there was chocolate. I grabbed another Milky Way.  
  
Oz was munching on some Malt balls. "Some quality treats here, Giles."  
  
Giles looked green. "*Please*, finish them."  
  
I smiled at him. "Uhm, this is much better. There is no problem that can not be solved with chocolate."  
  
Willow leaned back, crossing her arms over her stomach. "I think I'm going to barf."  
  
'Uh oh. Candy overload.' "Except that."  
  
I saw Xander staring at Anya while he was eating his candy. "What?!" I guess Anya finally had enough. I still don't know why they're together. Xander is a real demon magnet, I guess.  
  
He tilted his head at her. "That's your scary costume?" I almost choked on my Milky Way. I thought she was just wearing that thing because of last minute costume finding problems.  
  
Anya looked calmly at Xander and said, "Bunnies frighten me."  
  
"Oh, bloody hell. The inscription!" Giles yelled. He looked like he wanted to hit himself.  
  
"What's the matter?" It's not often I see Giles look so sheepish--without my help, that is.  
  
Giles came over to show me the book full of words that had no meaning to me. "I should have translated the Gaelic inscription under the illustration of Gachnar."  
  
I looked at it. But had no idea what it said. "What's it say?"  
  
"Actual size."  
  
'So goes my life.' I shrugged and closed the book. 


End file.
